


I Have Too Many Fucks To Give About This Marriage: A Billdip Christmas Story

by AlphaDeerTree, incognitoburrito



Series: It's The Most Wonderful Time of the Year: 2018 Christmas Specials [1]
Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: 24 hours, Adultery, Christmas, F/M, Human Bill Cipher, M/M, Marriage, NSFW, Pacifica Northwest Being A Jerk, Pacifica Northwest is a whore, Smut, Song: I Write Sins Not Tragedies (Panic! At The Disco), Song: Sweater Weather (The Neighbourhood), Song: When I Was Your Man, Wedding, daily updates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-01
Updated: 2018-12-31
Packaged: 2019-08-23 18:48:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 25
Words: 57,898
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16624460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlphaDeerTree/pseuds/AlphaDeerTree, https://archiveofourown.org/users/incognitoburrito/pseuds/incognitoburrito
Summary: Based on:"I Write Sins Not Tragedies" - Panic! At The Disco"Sweater Weather" - The Neighbourhood"When I Was Your Man" - Bruno MarsBill Cipher's not looking forward to Christmas.His ex-boyfriend (who he still longs for) Dipper Pines is marrying Pacifica Northwest and there's nothing he can do about it until he and Mabel find some incriminating text messages on Pacifica's phone. They decide there's only one thing to do—crash the wedding.Oh, well imagineAs I'm pacing the pews in a church corridorAnd I can't help but to hearNo, I can't help but to hear an exchanging of words"What a beautiful wedding! What a beautiful wedding," says a bridesmaid to a waiter"And yes, but what a shame, what a shame the poor groom's bride is a whore!"I chimed in with a, "Haven't you people ever heard of closing the goddamn door?!"No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality





	1. 12:00 AM: The Wrong Person

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone!
> 
> My friend Vii (AlphaDeerTree) and I (incognitoburritoo) are so excited to bring you this special Christmas fanfiction throughout December. This fanfic is based on **I Write Sins Not Tragedies** by Panic! At the Disco and **Sweater Weather** by The Neighbourhood.
> 
> We've been pouring blood, sweat, and tears into this project since November, so we really hope you enjoy it.
> 
> There will be 24 chapters, one representing one hour of the day, going from 12:00 AM on December 24 to 12:00AM on December 25. The twenty-fifth chapter is a "One Year Later" epilogue; it's our Christmas gift to you. This entire fanfiction is a rollercoaster of emotion and events, so sit down and buckle up!
> 
> Please be aware that production on my other chaptered fanfictions (I Won't Lose You, Too, Inside It's Empty, Treat You Better and Creep) have been halted/may slow down for a hot minute so we can work on this. It takes a lot of work to write a 24-chapter Christmas special, not to mention I'm doing this very same thing with 2 other ships and 1 other fandom.
> 
> That's all the notes I have for you. We sincerely hope you like this. Merry Christmas!

#  **12:00 AM - The Wrong Person**

Dipper never realized it was possible to experience so many emotions all at once.

As he stares at his bedroom Christmas tree illuminated by multicolored lights, he thinks back to the moment Pacifica had said yes.

_“Do you remember that day?” he asked, staring into her eyes. “When we first met here when we were sixteen?”_

_Pacifica looked down at the ground and smiled. “Yeah. I still remember what you wore.”_

_Dipper raised an eyebrow. “What was I wearing?”_

_“You were wearing a yellow t-shirt that was_ way _too big for you,” she said, “and red basketball shorts. I was so nervous to talk to you.”_

_“It was a miracle when we found out we went to the same school,” Dipper told her. “It was a miracle you said yes when I asked you out.”_

_“I never thought you would,” Pacifica confessed. “Always thought you would've been too shy.”_

_“Sometimes you have to do things you hate for the people you love.”_

_Pacifica's face flushed._

_“Pacifica?”_

_“Yeah?”_

_Dipper bit his tongue, not sure how to ask the question he had been wanting to ask for the past three years. “I—I’m hoping another miracle will happen today.”_

_Her eyes lit up. “What are you saying?”_

_A lump formed in Dipper's throat as he got down on one knee and pulled the tiny velvet box out of his pocket. “Pacifica, will you marry me?”_

Months ago, she said yes. Now, the wedding day is tomorrow—or, actually, in a few short hours, now that the clock has struck midnight. Dipper is getting excited and restless, happy that his new life would start in a few hundred minutes, but not everything was perfect. There is still a dark cloud looming overhead, threatening to shatter everything into a million pieces.

Bill.

As a bisexual, Dipper has dated both guys and girls, but Bill was the first boyfriend he had who showed he truly cared about him. Bill constantly gave him kisses on the cheek, respected his sexual limits, and remembered important dates and events. He was the best boyfriend he could've asked for.

Until all of that changed.

Bill still respected his boundaries but the loving boyfriend he once was turned into someone else. It started small, then quickly escalated. He stopped responding to Dipper’s text messages. He never called to see how he was doing. They stopped seeing each other often, and when they _were_ together, Bill’s behavior had changed. It was as if he was suddenly more uncomfortable around Dipper, like he was an _inconvenience._ Dipper was feeling alienated, like he didn’t even know who he was anymore.

_“Bill?” Dipper touched his shoulder gently, something he hadn’t done in a while. His boyfriend was wearing headphones and flinched at the touch._

_Taking the devices out of his ears, he said, “Oh. Hey, Pine Tree. What’s up?”_

Pine Tree _was a nickname that Bill never used when they were dating. He had always called him corny pet names, like “sweetheart” and “cutie.” “Pine Tree” was basically equivalent to calling him “Dipper”._

_Dipper scratched the back of his head, unsure how to approach the topic of feeling neglected and like he was single again. “Bill...can I talk to you for a second?”_

_Bill pulled up a chair and sat down in it. “Sure, what is it?”_

_The brown-haired teenager decided there wasn’t much point dodging the topic. “Why have you been ignoring me?”_

_There it was, plain and simple. Dipper just wanted to know why his boyfriend was ghosting him._

_The blond boy wore a look of confusion on his face. “What do you mean?”_

_Dipper sighed in frustration. “You know damn well what, I mean, Bill. You keep leaving me on read. You’ve been acting like I don’t exist, you’ve stopped showing me affection. You’re ghosting me.”_

_“I’m not ghosting you, sweetheart,” he said sweetly as he caressed his face. Dipper slapped his hand away, sick of his façade._

_“Cut the shit,” Dipper snapped. “You know what I’m talking about.”_

_“Babe, I would_ never _treat you so badly,” Bill said, maintaining the same tone of voice. “If you felt neglected, why didn’t you just tell me?”_

 _“BECAUSE YOU WERE NEVER THERE!” Dipper yelled. “You are NEVER with me anymore! You always go to gay bars and drink, talking to other guys as if I don’t EXIST! AND WHEN WE_ ARE _TOGETHER, I’M INVISIBLE!”_

_Bill’s face hardened and the sweetness eroded away into something more serious and angrier. “I didn’t think you noticed,” he responded, voice flat._

_Dipper bit his tongue, only because the only alternative physical reaction would be to kick him where it would hurt in the morning. “So you admit it. Why do you hate me all of a sudden?”_

_The blond teenager tucked strands of hair behind his ear in nervousness, hesitating before he gave the shittiest answer possible. “I dunno.”_

_It was all he could do not to slap him._

_“You...don’t..._ know _?” Dipper inhaled the entire room, trying to compose himself. Angry Dipper wasn’t a pretty sight. “You don’t KNOW?”_

 _Bill stayed silent as Dipper continued his rampage. “One does not simply GHOST THEIR BOYFRIEND FOR NO REASON! THERE’S_ ALWAYS _A REASON BEHIND IT, BILL!”_

_“Not always,” he responded coolly._

_“Yes. There is,” Dipper said through gritted teeth, slowly approaching him. “What is_ wrong _with you?!”_

_“You can’t know,” he said. “It would be best if you didn’t.”_

_Dipper scoffed. “What, did you_ kill _someone?”_

_“No,” Bill responded in a monotone, face stone-cold, expressionless._

_Dipper turned away, not looking at his boyfriend anymore. “It’s like you don’t care about me,” he said, tears beginning to form in his eyes. “You don’t care that I exist.”_

_Bill pursed his lips, staring straight at the brown-haired boy. “I_ do _care, sweetheart,” he said in a softer voice, resembling the tone he had at the beginning of the confrontation. “There are just...reasons. Reasons that I don’t want you to know about.”_

 _Dipper furiously exhaled, running a hand through his hair. “_ Reasons? _What REASONS?! What could possibly be so--”_

_Bill wrapped his arms around Dipper’s body, crashing his lips against his to silence his irritated boyfriend, only annoying him further. Bill weighed almost twice as him, so fighting him by shoving him away wouldn’t do much. Instinctually, his knee shoots upward, striking him directly in the garden of good and evil._

_The blond boy immediately let go of Dipper’s small figure, collapsing to the ground, spilling expletives into the air. “FUCK! FUCKIN’ PIECE OF_ SHIT _, WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?!”_

_Dipper didn’t bother trying to stop the tears from flowing. “Get out.”_

_Bill looked up at him. “What?!”_

_“GET OUT! NOW!”_

Dipper’s memory of the rest of that day is foggy. Bill didn’t speak to him much after that. They were seventeen when that happened. Five years later, the wounds are still fresh, and their feelings are still there.

As he sat up in bed he didn’t even notice the tears streaming down his cheeks until he felt them slip down his face and hit his hand. “Ugh..” He sniffed, wiping them away. Instead of thinking about his big day the only thing he could think about was.. Unfortunately, Bill. So much for sleeping tonight.

He casted a glance to his phone on the nightstand only hesitating for a moment before picking it up and sending a message to the only other person he could trust.

[12:02 AM] **mabel? Are you awake?**

[12:02 AM] _ofc whats up dippy_

He took a deep but shaky breath, briefly regretting his decision for a moment. After all it’d been years after his fall out with Bill, he should be over it by now but..

[12:05 AM] _dip? U still there??_

[12:05 AM] **yeah, yeah I’m here**

No he couldn’t keep this down, he was past the point of no return already.

[12:06 AM] **somethings up, can we talk?**

[12:06 AM] _say no more bro-bro_

In less than a minute, the phone in his hands rang, and he wasted no time answering it. Dipper almost smiled as he heard his sister’s teasing voice over the phone. “What’s up, Mr. Man of the Hour? Are you nervous about your wedding or something?”

Dipper swallowed. “Something.. like that.”

He must have sounded upset because she paused for a moment, he could hear a faint shuffling heard on her line playful demeanor gone as she asked, concerned. “What’s wrong?”

“It’s nothing big, its just...dumb, really.”

“Dipper. I’m your sister, no matter how dumb it is, you can tell me. Ya know?”

“I know, I know.” And he was happy to have someone like Mabel to talk to, but Dipper still hesitated; he didn’t want to worry Mabel with this, especially not this late but he didn’t want to think about it alone. “Do...do you remember what happened with Bill?”

“..The break up?”

“Yeah. That.”

There was another beat of silence before Mabel spoke up. “You’re right, that is a pretty shitty thing to think about on your wedding day.”

He couldn’t help but laugh, despite himself. “Yeah. Sorry.”

“Don’t be, your amazing sister is here to help.”

“You’re my _only_ sister.”

“Details, details.” He could imagine her waving her hand dismissively at him, he rolled his eyes at her. “Now, what has you thinkin’ about ol’ Bill Cipher?”

“I--I don’t know, it's late and I’m nervous...I guess.” Dipper ran a hand through his hair, wishing he had a pen to chew on. “I still can’t believe I’m getting married in just a few short hours and I’m ecstatic about that.” He was, he couldn’t be more excited. But this odd feeling--Dipper didn’t know how to describe it--it was spoiling his happiness.

She paused. “You still love him.”

Dipper tightens the grip on the phone and he sighed, not wanting to admit he knew Mabel was right. “He was the first person I loved, Mabel. I still think about why he broke up with me. He never told me, and I never figured it out.”

“Dipper, maybe you should…” Mabel trails off, as if she doesn’t want to complete her sentence.

“What?” Dipper says. “Maybe I should what?”

Mabel sighs, deciding there was no point in delaying her response. “Maybe you should talk to him.”

“ _Mabel_.”

“Hear me out, Dippy! I know you guys haven’t talked much.” Or at all. The only times they communicate is when they awkwardly bump into each other in public or at social gatherings. “But maybe it would help the both of you?”

Dipper groaned, not responding to his twin sister’s suggestion. What a shitty thing to be thinking of on the beginning of his wedding day.

Mabel pouts her lips. “Do you regret proposing to her?”

“ _No_ !” Dipper denies quickly. “ _No_ , of course not. I’m happy to be marrying Pacifica. She’s sweet, and kind, and I couldn’t be happier that she said yes...but I don’t know. I still think about how things _could_ have gone differently between Bill and I. But I know it’s pointless. It’s not fixing anything. I don’t even want to see him,” he lied.

“That was a lie. You’re lying to yourself.”

Dipper rolled his eyes, cringing. “Don’t call me out like this.”

“I’m sorry. I had to, Dippy.”

Dipper couldn’t help but laugh, despite himself. “So, how do I get out of this? I don’t want to talk to him—I can’t. I’m getting _married_ , Mabel! It wouldn’t do anyone any good.”

Mabel sighed. “Dunno. Just meditate and take a shower if you can’t sleep. And don’t overthink so much. Distract yourself.”

“Yeah. Yeah, okay. Thanks.”

“Don’t mention it, and don’t stay up all night okay? You’ve got a big day coming up tomorrow—”

“In a few hours.”

“What was that? I couldn’t hear you over the sound of wedding bells.”

Dipper grinned. “Alright, alright. I won’t. Goodnight, Mabel.”

“Night-night, Dippingdots.”

The call disconnected, and Dipper was left alone with his thoughts again.

Unable to sleep and with a lot on his mind he decided to take Mabel up on at least one of her suggestions. Leaving his phone back on the nightstand, he pulled himself out of bed and headed towards the bathroom. Maybe a shower would help ease his nerves and put his thoughts at bay.

Locking the bathroom door (even though there would be no one to walk in on him), Dipper pulls off his clothes and turns the faucet so the water would begin to rain down from the shower head. He steps into the hot water, instantly relaxing him and the tension in his muscles began to fade away.

As the temperature steadily increased, Dipper found himself surrounded in warmth, and his mind drifted back to the first time he and Bill watched a movie together, enveloped in blankets, enjoying popcorn, and--

_No._

That wasn’t with Bill.

That was with Pacifica.

Dipper slaps himself across the face, a disgusting feeling of guilt settling into his stomach. How could he recall an event with his girlfriend _without his girlfriend_ ? And to make matters worse, replacing her with his _ex!_

 _Ugh!_ It was with _her!_ They were watching _The Notebook_ and it was with _Pacifica!_ Why the hell couldn’t he get the thought of Bill out of his mind?

Dipper easily could’ve thrown up in the shower right there, but he took three deep breaths and blinked twice. Bill is _gone_. No longer a part of his life. No need to worry about him anymore.

He would never be with Bill anymore.

Dipper sighs. He _loved_ Pacifica. There was no one else that was better than her. She was perfect for him in every way.

Right?

... _Right?_

His hands shook as Dipper began to feel woozy. A horrifying thought entered his mind.

He might’ve proposed to the wrong person.

He has literally less than 24 hours before that potentially-wrong-person would take his last name and they would spend eternity together. And he wouldn’t enjoy it, because of some stupid, blond, homosexual son of a bitch.

Dipper was ashamed to admit he still enjoyed reliving some of his memories from when they were dating. His favorite took place on his birthday, about six years ago.

 _“Are you_ sure _your parents are gone?”_

_Dipper’s face was fire-truck red as his boyfriend held him in his arms. “Of course, sweetheart,” he whispered seductively as he pressed soft kisses to his jawline. “None of our parents will ever have to know.”_

_The brown-haired boy’s breathing quickened as Bill’s hand slipped under his pants, toying with the erection inside. “Mason, you’re excited now, aren’t you?”_

_Oh_ God, _he loved it when Bill called him that. Dipper’s breath continued to speed up as Bill’s other hand undid the zipper and button on his jeans, and the article of clothing fell to the ground. “B-Bill, wait-”_

_Bill stopped, bringing his hands back up to his shoulders. “Is something wrong?”_

_“N-no, it’s just--” Dipper looked at the floor shamefully, embarrassed by how_ dirty _this felt. He wasn’t a hundred percent sure that he wanted to lose his virginity just yet._

_Well, he was. He was just nervous._

_“I’ve never done anything like this before,” Dipper admitted bashfully. “Still a virgin.”_

_Bill smiled. “I understand. Do you want to keep going?”_

_Dipper exhaled. “Um, I m-mean, yeah,” he stuttered. “Just...go slow.”_

_Bill slid a hand up Dipper’s shirt as he pressed another kiss to the top of his head in an attempt to relax him. “Okay. I promise.”_

_Dipper blushed profusely as his fingers fumbled their way to Bill’s shirt, clumsily undoing the buttons until his chest was exposed. He experimentally ran his hands across his body, pressing his lips to the hot skin._

_He paused for a moment. “Shouldn’t we get the water running?”_

_Bill wordlessly wrapped his arms around Dipper and picked him up, shoving him against the wall of the shower and pinning his limbs there, making the smaller boy squeak. “One minute,” he whispers as he crashes his lips against Dipper’s._

_Dipper’s hand hungrily finds its way to Bill’s crotch, pulling his pants down and discarding them outside the shower. He took the hard length in his hand, amazed by how large it was. Bill’s lips began leaving kisses that were rougher, travelling down his neck and onto his collarbone._

_A bit of shame began to creep into his mind as Dipper curiously stroked his hand up and down Bill’s member. A shudder escaped him as Bill looked up at his boyfriend. “Keep doing that, Mason.”_

_Dipper did as Bill said, continuously stroking his cock as he writhed in pleasure. Dipper never felt like this before, and it was an intoxicating new sensation he wanted to explore further. Hopefully, Bill would be the only person ever to see him in this state of arousal._

_Bill had lust in his eyes as his hand cupped Dipper’s groin, the worries about “going slow” seemingly out the window. “Mason-”_

_Dipper shuddered at the use of his actual name. The way Bill’s deep voice sugarcoated the five letters made him want to scream._

_“-I want to suck you off.”_

_Dipper swallowed nervously and said nothing--instead, he nodded his head rapidly and exhaled, resisting the urge to grab Bill’s head and pull him down to his dick._

_Bill got on his knees and stroked Dipper’s penis, making sure it was hard before using his tongue to flick the underside of his prick. Dipper cried out in pleasure, breathing labored but still unable to speak before Bill trapped it in his mouth._

_He felt lightheaded as the sensation overtook him, his body shaking, uncontrollable screams pouring out of him. Dipper yelled his name, fisting his hair and pushing his head further down his penis until-_

Dipper’s heart sank as his body jolted, ejaculating into the open air.

He looked down, and saw that his hand and member was coated in white. His head swam as he processed what just happened. He, Dipper, an engaged man with a wedding less than a day away, was touching himself while thinking about having sex with an ex-boyfriend.

Never in his life had he been so mortified, disgusted by his own actions he quickly wrapped up his shower and turned the water off. He let out a shaky breath before stepping out and wrapping himself in a towel, beginning to dry off. He couldn’t believe himself, he wasn’t supposed to be thinking about his ex-boyfriend, let alone jacking off to the thought of his mouth on his-

“ _Stop!_ ” he hisses at himself, narrowing his eyes at his reflection in the mirror. He couldn’t keep thinking about things like that, it wasn’t right. It wasn’t fair to the woman he’d be marrying in just a few hours.

He felt a wave of guilt wash over him as he remembered that detail, the full effects of what he’d just done sinking in even more.

Pacifica really did deserve someone better than him.

He picked up the clothes he brought in and started getting dressed, wishing he could take back what he’d just done. Leaving the bathroom, he lets the steam flow out as he went back to his bedroom. As much as he regretted what happened in the shower it did help with one thing, he was exhausted. Lying back in bed, he slipped under the covers. In a few hours, things would be different. He’d be happily married and the memories of his ex-boyfriend would disappear. He couldn’t change what happened then, no matter how ashamed he was for it--but it was a one time thing and it wouldn’t happen again.

Or so he tried to convince himself.

With a tired glance to the alarm clock on his night stand, he closed his eyes and slowly drifted off to sleep with a final image in his mind.

It was 1:00 AM.


	2. 1:00 AM: The Text Messages

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi again! So far, we've stuck to our promise! Let's hope that keeps up!  
> Here's 1:00AM.

#  **1:00 AM - The Text Messages**

It had been about half an hour since her phone call with the man of the hour and Mabel was no closer to sleeping than the local insomniac.

Pacing only managed to work her up even more, and laying in the comfort of her many, many cotton puffed blankets proved itself useless as she only tossed and turned trying to find a comfortable spot and fell off the bed in the process. So, she found herself sitting in the kitchen with a flurry of worries in one hand and a spoonful of ice cream in the other.

“This isn’t fair,” she grumbled through her spoonful of mint chocolate. Never did she think _she’d_ be the one so worried about her brother’s wedding day; if anything, she thought she’d be the one to have to calm her brother’s nerves down when she received that phone call--only to be surprised by it turning out to be the last thing she were to expect mere hours away from the big ceremony. No matter how much Dipper tried to convince himself he was happy, it was still obvious he was depressed.

That was the feeling she had antiquated herself all too well with before. Regret.

“He’s ruining his chances at true happiness!” she whined into another spoonful. It was clear that he’d never really gotten over Bill and as much as he could try and push down his feelings, she knew it would only make things worse. Yet, she couldn’t do much about it. He still didn’t want to talk to Bill, and maybe he _did_ have feelings for Pacifica as well, he couldn’t just back out of the wedding like that.

Or maybe he could, but Mabel knew her brother. Dipper wouldn’t do that.

And she just had to respect that.

She groaned. “This is so stupid.” She couldn’t do a thing but stand by and watch her brother make a mistake--quite possibly the worst one of his life. She’d tried to get them to talk before, and even now she had tried yet again only to be met with the same response she’d heard over and over again. Mabel let out a deep sigh and leaned back in her chair. “What am I gonna do?”

As if on cue, her phone buzzed in her pocket. Pulling it out and looking at the text message she had just received, Mabel is pleasantly surprised when she sees it’s Bill.

 **[1:32 AM]** _mabel_

 **[1:32 AM]** _halp_

Poor Bill. Dipper definitely isn’t the only one who is suffering.

In the long years since their breakup, Bill has seen Mabel as the sister he never had, someone to fall back on and always trust no matter what. The night Mabel went to his house and Bill told her what had happened…

Mabel didn’t like to think about that.

 **[1:32 AM]** **ur sad aren’t u**

 **[1:33 AM]** _yes_

 **[1:33 AM]** _halpppp_

 **[1:33 AM]** **please be more specific i can’t *halp* u if i don’t know how to *halp***

 **[1:33 AM]** _i’m just rly regretting the things i did to him and wishing things could be different...sorta like every day ig_

Mabel stopped herself before her thumbs touched the screen. _Should she tell him about Dipper’s suppressed feelings?_

No. It would only cause more harm than good. Bill might do something irrational, like try to crash the wedding. There would be no reason to ruin Dipper’s happiest day.

But...it _isn’t_ Dipper’s happiest day. He obviously still loves Bill, and him being bound to the wrong person for eternity isn’t exactly the greatest thing ever. Mabel could tell Dipper loved her--he has a certain look when he admires Pacifica. His pupils dilate, his eyes widen. It’s as if he’s looking at the most beautiful thing in the world. But what if he loves Bill more than her?

Mabel’s thoughts drift to the last time Bill and Dipper bumped into each other.

 _“We can’t keep buying this, Mabel,” Dipper had said to her. “It’s_ so _unhealthy for you.”_

_“Come onnn, Dippy! You know how much I love gummy worms!”_

_He rolled his eyes. “Fine. But I’m not eating them. If_ you _want to gain weight like_ this, _that’s fine.”_

_They were at the grocery store. It was the middle of the night, and Mabel went for a midnight snack only to find they were completely out of food. So here they were._

_Dipper looked down at his phone to check off “snacks” on his shopping list. When he looked up, his heart stopped._

_Bill._

_He was wearing a ragged collar shirt and sweatpants. His blond hair was still as short as ever, which is to say, not very short for a male. His golden locks just barely touched his shoulders and covered almost half of his face, though he didn’t need to see his face to recognize him. The tattoo on his arm was confirmation enough._

_Dipper wanted to slap himself across the face for thinking that he was hot. He_ was _attractive, but that didn’t matter. He had Pacifica, and he was definitely happy with her. He was happy with Pacifica. He was happy with Pacifica. He was happy. He had a new girlfriend, and he had no regrets._

_The blond bastard turned around and almost jumped at the sight of his ex-boyfriend. “Pine Tree?”_

_Dipper averted his gaze and kept his head down as he exited the aisle without another word. Bill didn’t try to stop him._

_Mabel gave him a sympathetic look as she followed Dipper out of the store. She knew something was up with him. The look he gave Bill--it could only be described as desire and regret combined into one. He appeared lovesick, like he wanted to kiss him so badly but couldn’t. The look only lasted a second, but it was there._

_Mabel could tell they still had feelings for each other._

As the memory ends, a realization slaps her across the face.

Dipper could never be truly happy unless he is with Bill. He doesn’t love Pacifica the way he loves Bill.

Mabel’s fingers dance above the phone screen, still mentally debating whether or not it would be a good idea to tell Bill about Dipper’s feelings. It might be an invasion of his privacy if Mabel told him--Dipper never said he could tell Bill this, and he _obviously_ would never be okay with if it Mabel did.

But...a couple _nudges_ in the right direction wouldn’t hurt anyone, now would it? Mabel didn’t realize how far she zoned out until a series of messages flashed on her screen.

 **[1:41 AM]** _I MISS MY PINETREE_

 **[1:41 AM]** _ANY TIME I GOES TO THE STORE I CRII_

 **[1:41 AM]** _FUCK CHRISTMAS_

 **[1:42 AM]** _THIS ISNT THE JOLLIEST TIME OF THE YEAR_

 **[1:42 AM]** _THIS IS FALSE ADVERTISING_

 **[1:42 AM]** _CANT U SEE MY BOYFRIEND IS GETTING MARRIED TO A HOE_

 **[1:42 AM]** _AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA_

**[1:43 AM] SORRY BILL**

**[1:43 AM] I WAS JUST THINKING**

**[1:43 AM]** _about what???_

Fuck. There was no getting out of _this_.

 **[1:43 AM]** **you HAVE TO PROMISE NOT TO TELL ANYONE!!!1!!!!!11!**

 **[1:43 AM]** _don’t worry i’m not a 4th grader what *fucking* is it_

Mabel typed out the dangerous message and her thumb hovered over the Send icon that resembled a paper airplane.

_Fuck it._

**[1:44 AM]** **DIPPER LOVES U SHLGHSKGH**

 **[1:44 AM]** _You’re shitting me._

**[1:44 AM] nO SHIT HERE ONLY 167830% TRUTH**

**[1:44 AM] HE DEADASS TOLD ME HE IS WORRIED ABOUT HIS WEDDING BECUASE HE STILL HAS FEELINGSS FORUUUUU HASKHSGHSKGASHGH**

**[1:45 AM] IT’S KEEPING HIM FROM BEING HAPPEEEEEEEEEE**

**[1:45 AM]** _I want proof_

 **[1:45 AM]** _dipper has no reason to love me_

**[1:45 AM] YES HE DOES HAVE YOU EVER LOOKED IN THE GODDAMN MIRROR?????**

**[1:46 AM]** _awe_

 **[1:46 AM]** _you’re still full of bullshit_

 **[1:46 AM]** _but you’re sweet_

 **[1:46 AM]** _sweet billshit_

**[1:47 AM] did.**

**[1:47 AM] did you just.**

**[1:47 AM]** _SORRY that’s autocorrect i call myself “billshit” a lot :3_

**[1:48 AM] i dont kno whether to smack u or feel sorry for u**

**[1:48 AM]** _you can do both it’s okie_

 **[1:48 AM]** _i still want proofs_

**[1:48 AM] uuuhhhhhhhhh**

**[1:48 AM] COME TO HIS WEDDING**

The two check marks next to the text bubble light up blue, meaning he’s read the message, but he’s not typing.

Damn. Mabel decides she should take the time to elaborate.

**[1:50 AM] OKAY HEAR ME OUT SO LIKE?? COME OVER ASAP AND I’LL GET U A DISGUISE SO DIPDOP DON’T RECOGNIZE U AND THEN I’LL WEAR A WIRE !!!! AND GET DIPPY TO CONFESS AGAIN AND YOU’LL HAVE YOUR PROOF**

**[1:51 AM]** _do you know how fucking *sadistic* you sound rn?? You can’t get pine tree to tell you that again!! It’s his wedding!!!! Even if he loves me still, he’ll be happier with pacifica SO WHY WOULD YOU RUIN IT FURTHER_

**[1:51 AM] BILL BELIEVE IN THE POWER OF MABEL**

**[1:51 AM] BILLIEF**

**[1:52 AM]** _I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU JUST DID THAT_

**[1:52 AM] YOU STARTED IT !!!**

**[1:52 AM] i really really wanna do this!! Plzzz!!!**

**[1:52 AM] and by the way, he won’t be happy either way. I’m not ruining anything**

**[1:53 AM]** _are you saying we should crash the wedding???_

**[1:53 AM] nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnoo i’m just saying that he might eventually divorce her**

**[1:53 AM]** _fine whatever but don’t come crying to me when dipper comes crying to you_

 **[1:54 AM]** _do you want me to come over_

**[1:54 AM] YES GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE!!**

**[1:56 AM]** _omw_

Mabel beamed, happy with her plan. Bill was going to be _unrecognizable_ with the disguise she would whip up for him. Dipper was going to confess his true feelings, and that marriage would end faster than it could start.

Dipper and Pacifica aren’t meant to be, that was for sure. An attachment that lasts _that_ long after what happened between them is fucking powerful.

And she was going to make sure they were together forever.


	3. 2:00 AM: Bill's Disguise

#  **2:00 AM - Bill’s Disguise**

“Hey there, Billshit!"  Mabel says to Bill as he enters her house four minutes after the last text message.

“Hi.” Bill steps in and sits down on her sofa, as he normally does whenever he comes over. “So, do you have a disguise ready?”

“It was four minutes, calm down!” Mabel walked into her kitchen and turned the light on. “Are you hungry or something?”

Her eyes land on the mac n’ cheese in her pantry, and she freezes. The memory of the night Bill confessed everything comes rushing back.

“Mabel?” Bill stands up and walks into the kitchen, wondering why she isn’t responding to him. “What are you--”

The brunette turns and looks at Bill, who looks like he’s just been shot in the heart. Mac n’ cheese is a bit of a trigger for the both of them.

_ “What the FUCK did you do to my brother?!” _

_ Mabel almost yelled these words at Bill through the phone. She was furious. Her little brother had come to her in tears, saying that Bill was an asshole and he should’ve never started dating him. She wanted answers, and she wanted them now. _

_ “Mabel, please--” The brown-haired teenage girl was almost shocked to hear Bill become choked up; he was the sort of man that deadass never cried. Not at funerals, not at injuries, not at a dog dying in a movie. “--I can explain.” _

_ “You better explain right now, or I can come over to your house and chop your penis off.” _

_ Bill exhaled. “Just--come over--don’t chop my penis--I can explain.” _

_ Mabel paused for a short moment. “Fine. Be there in 10.” _

_ Mabel knocked on his apartment door. “Hey, asshat! It’s Mabel!” she exclaimed loudly. _

_ Bill opened the door. He looked like a bloody mess--hair disheveled, clothing wrinkled, eyes slightly puffy. He said nothing and instead gestured for her to enter. _

_ She did, and stood in front of the blond teenager. “Talk.” _

_ Bill opened his mouth, but no noise came out. The only thing he could think about is how he did every possible thing wrong. His mere existence was a burden on everyone. Bill causes and spreads nothing but pain and suffering. He was a demon--a demon in a human’s disgusting body. He didn't belong here. _

_ Suddenly, Bill collapsed. He was on his knees, sobbing--no,  _ bawling _. He was producing the most awful sound Mabel had ever heard in her life. It was more heartbreaking than a baby’s cry. Seeing this seemingly strong person shatter into pieces in front of her, it was devastating. _

_ Mabel got on her knees and wrapped her arms around Bill, staying silent, and unable to remain angry at him. Bill sobbed into her shoulder, his body still shaking with each cry that escapes him. All the pain, all the suppressed fear, all the worry had finally caught up to him and bitten him right in the ass. _

_ “Bill, what happened?” _

_ Bill pulled out of Mabel’s embraced and crawled backwards, away from her and curling up into a ball, as if he were a diseased animal that didn’t want to spread his illness to anyone. “It’s--” Bill exhaled, trying to regain control of his breathing. “It’s a really long story.” _

_ “Then go ahead and tell it!” she says, taking off her coat and hanging it on the hook next to the door. “I don’t have anywhere else to be!” _

_ He wiped some more tears from his eyes and sniffed. “Where do you want me to start?” _

_ “At the beginning. However far back that is.” _

_ He averted his gaze from the brunette for a brief period of time as he assessed when “the beginning” would be. Eventually, he spoke up. “Started when I was born.” Another lump was forming in his throat, and Bill swallowed. He couldn’t cry, he needed to tell this story. “My parents were abusive. My dad--fucking bastard, he never spent a second of his life sober. And my mom, she was horrible, when she was around.” _

_ Mabel felt her heart tear. Sliced, straight down the middle. She never knew that. _

_ “Don’t-”- He heaved in a shaky, watery breath. “Don’t get me wrong she tried to--to make things better...but eventually just  _ stopped _.”  _ _ He could feel another round of tears boiling up. “Took his side to save herself from the beatings.”  _

_ Mabel’s chest hurt but she remained quiet, letting him continue. _

_ “They--” His speech was interrupted by another round of silent tears, which he hid by burying his face in his arms. “They beat me. Both of them did. Dad because he thought I wasn’t good enough, Mom ‘cause she decided I wasn’t worth it, I guess.” He mumbled, wiping at his eyes best he could. “Maybe I wasn’t.”  _

_ “No, no don’t say that.” Mabel finally spoke up, voice soft as she walked over and laid a hand on the blonde’s shoulder in an attempt to calm him down. _

_ Bill quickly squirmed away from her touch, as if it had physically pained him. "No,” he whispered shakily. “Don’t touch me. I’ll only hurt you.” _

_ She couldn’t help but feel a pang of pain for the man, someone so strong and confident pulled apart into mere pieces laid out in front of her and yet she found the strength to look him in the eyes and gently take his hands, determination flaring in her eyes. “That’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make.” _

_ It was in that moment where the similarities between the two Pines twins hit him. It pained him, but he couldn’t help but smile weakly. “You’re ridiculous, kid. Just like your brother.” He couldn’t find it in him to back away from her again. _

_ “Of course. Tell me something I don’t know,” Mabel quipped as she smiled back warmly. The brunette looked up at him when he stayed silent for a few seconds. “Go on.” _

_ He sighed loudly before elaborating further. “My childhood was shit. I got so sick of it I started leaving on my own. Started hanging out with the wrong people, started doing bad shit to get by. Selling drugs, drinking, y’know. Shady shit like that.” He sniffed. “It wasn’t  _ so  _ bad, really, compared to what my dad was doing to my mom back home. At least I never beat anyone.” Bill bit his lip and shook his head. “It was good.. I even found a group, gang of misfits I considered family. The family I never had, y’know? Helped me feel like I belonged for once.” He smiled at the memory, a small smile. “Even helped me get my own place to escape to, never had to go back to my shitty parents again. Don’t even think they miss me, honestly. If I had to guess, I would say they don’t even remember having a child at all. Who knows, maybe I even have a bunch of siblings I don’t know about.” Bill paused for a moment and it was up to anyone guess what he could have been thinking about. Eventually he said, “That place they got me, it wasn't perfect...but it’s mine. And I wasn’t being abused.” _

_ “That makes it better.” Mabel gently spoke up and Bill hummed in agreement.  _

_ “I met you two the year after, I think. We were fifteen,” Bill continued, looking a bit calmer, almost fond of the memory that came next. “You both had such an energy. It was different, being around your brother. It was different from my other friends. Dunno how to describe it.” The faintest hints of a blush dusted on his cheeks and Mabel softened. “I never believed in love at first sight until I saw him.” _

_ “So, what happened?” Mabel asked, voice quieter than before. _

_ “I started dating your brother. Things were going well for a long time. Then, when we were sixteen, we went to this Italian place together. I didn’t know this when I took him out, but apparently, my ‘friends’ were there and they wanted to rob the place. Shitty situation with money, I guess. They saw me there with Pine Tree. Saw us kiss.” _

_ Mabel got a queasy feeling in her stomach. She could sense where this was going. _

_ “My friends gave me hell afterwards. Told me I was a dumbass for hooking up with the nerdy kid. They actually went to our school, but almost never showed up. But they still knew all the students, so they knew who Pine Tree was. I started feeling ashamed, and I started thinking Dipper didn’t deserve me. And I felt like I owed it to my friends to do what they wanted, since they got me out of my parents’ house. So I started ghosting him. Then he confronted me about it, and--” Bill bit his tongue, trying to keep himself from bursting into tears all over again. “Here we are.” _

_ “Wow,” Mabel whispered in awe. “You’re such a moron.” _

_ Bill nodded. “I’m aware.” _

_ “No, really, you’re like, a  _ colossal _ dumbass--” _

_ “Okay, yeah, I get it, Mabel. I’m stupid.” _

_ Both of them sat in silence for a moment, the only sound to be heard was Bill’s shaky breaths from him trying to recompose himself. That was until Mabel spoke up. “So, what are you gonna do?” _

_ “What can I do? Dipper doesn’t want to even look at me, Mabel.” He looked like he was ready to fall apart all over again. “He isn’t going to want to listen to me either and--” He breathed out shakily, burying his face into his knees. “And I don’t blame him. He deserves so much better than someone like me.” _

_ Mabel nods silently. “Yeah, couldn’t have said it better myself. Asshole.” _

_ Normally, Bill would’ve slugged her in the arm for a remark like that, but he didn’t have the energy. He deserved it, anyway. Actually, he deserved a lot  _ worse _. _

_ “It’ll be okay,” Mabel says, saltiness seemingly toned down a few notches. “I can make you some comfort food. How about Mac n’ Cheese?” _

_ Bill sniffed again. “Sure.” _

_ Mabel and Bill spent the remainder of the night in his apartment, talking over bowls of Mac n’ Cheese. Mabel did her best to comfort the damaged teenage boy--of course, her smart quips were still present. When she had finished cooking the food, she gave Bill a large bowl and said, “Here. Now eat it like it’s Dipper’s ass.” _

_ Bill didn’t appreciate Mabel’s extra rudeness, but he took what he could get. Still, the comment had made him groan. “Why are you doing this to me, Mabel? I thought we were friends,” the blond teenager joked. _

_ “We are,” she said. “Guess I’m still a lil’ bit bitter about you breaking Dipper’s heart and being a dumbass and things like that. Eat your food.” _

Neither Mabel nor Bill were ever able to look at a box of mac n’ cheese without the memory of that night coming back.

“Do you remember that night?” Mabel thought aloud.

“How could I forget?” he responded. “Seven years ago, but it feels like yesterday.”

Mabel laughed. “Wasn’t that funny? What I said to you when I served you the food?”

Bill giggled, but pinched himself, hoping the brunette didn’t hear. “No!” He had to admit that in hindsight, it was quite hilarious. It still stung, and he didn’t appreciate it, but it  _ was _ funny.

“Oh, come _onnn_! It totally was!”

“I swear,” he exhaled, “your smart-assery is just as bad as Pine Tree’s.”

“Psh, Dipper  _ wishes  _ he was on my level.” Mabel smugly replied as she reached over to grab the box. “Are you still hungry, though? I could make this real quick.”

The offer as tempting as it was had him pause for a second and glance over at the brunette. “That depends, are you going to tell me to eat it like its Dipper’s ass again?”

“...Maybe.”

“You’re a monster, Shooting Star,” he deadpanned with no real heat, biting his tongue to keep himself from laughing. “I’d love some.”

* * *

 

Mabel took Bill’s hand as soon as he was done eating. “Come with me,” she says. “I think I have some hair dye in my bathroom.”

Bill scoffed. “I’m not  _ dyeing _ my hair!”

“Oh, quit whining. It washes out. Just don’t get near water, you’ll be fine.”

Mabel opened the door to her bathroom and shoved Bill inside, closing the door behind her. Her hands instantly went to the light switch, and the entire room illuminated a brilliant shade of pink. In fact, the entire  _room_ was pink--pink towels, pink soaps, pink bath rug. 

Bill looked around, slightly disgusted. “When did you have time to do all this to your bathroom?”

“Few months ago,” she says as she heads for a drawer on the other side of the room. “Redesigned the whole thing. I got those special colored light bulbs so it could be pink.”

_ Gross _ , Bill thought to himself, but he wasn’t going to insult Mabel when she had promised to help him.

Mabel got a jar of black hair dye from the drawer and shook it. “Oh…looks like it’s almost out.”

Bill’s heart sank, knowing it could only mean one thing. “And?”

“Means we have to go to Walmart.”

The blond man bit his tongue. “Mabel, come on. There’s gotta be some other store that sells hair dye.” Bill hated that store. When they dated, he and Dipper went shopping there almost every day, whenever they could. Some of his best memories with Dipper happened at that supermarket. When they broke up, Bill hasn’t been able to stand in that store without bursting into tears.

“Walmart is the only store that sells hair dye that actually  _ works _ ,” Mabel says, fully aware of Bill’s distaste for the store. “Come on, Bill, you’ll be fine!” The brown-haired woman threw the near-empty  can in the garbage as she led Bill out to her car. “Aren’t there any strategies you can use to keep you from...y’know?”

“I’ve heard chewing gum helps, but I’m not sure if that’ll work,” he says as he checks his pockets for a pack of gum. “Do you have any?”

“Yeah,” she says, handing him a piece. “It’s grape.”

Bill said nothing as he unwrapped the stick of gum and put it in his mouth. The flavor exploded in his mouth only to quickly fade away two seconds later, much to his displeasure.

The ride to Walmart didn’t last long, unfortunately. The supermarket was only two songs away from her house. Sometimes, Bill liked to count time in music to distract himself from anything bad that was coming.

“We’re here,” Mabel says as the car comes to a halt, he can hear the click of her seatbelt come off and she looks over at him. “Come on.”

“Can’t I just wait here? I promise I won’t drive off or anything.” 

Mabel raised an eyebrow at this, “I should hope not, but no, you’re coming with me. Now come on, big guy.” The blond across from her gave a soft groan, wanting nothing but to sink into his seat and stay there forever. It’d be much easier than watching his ex-boyfriend get wed to a discount barbie. 

Then again, he probably wouldn’t be able to stop that from happening if he didn’t get out of the car and make this sacrifice.

Begrudgingly, he pulled himself out of his seat and stepped out of the car, Mabel quickly following suit.

As they entered the store with minimal shoving, a wave of nostalgia washed over him. It'd been a while since Bill had stepped foot into this particular store, but it was still as colorful and decked full of Christmas merchandise as it always was around this time of year--which meant there were also quite a few decorated Christmas trees to greet them as they entered the store. The very fresh scent of pine wafted through the air. _Since when does fucking_ Walmart _sell real actual trees?_  Bill couldn't help but advert his gaze from them, though he could still very clearly smell the pine trees, which only managed to make the lump in his throat that much more difficult to swallow and he could swear it was getting harder to breathe-- 

“Bill?” Mabel's voice snapped him out of his thoughts.

“ _ Y-Yeah _ ?” he barely managed to choke out, which caused the brunette beside him to knit her eyebrows in concern. 

“Are you okay?” she asked, “You kind of.. zoned out just now.”

“I'm fine,” he breathed out.  _ How did those breathing exercises go again? _ “I'm fine.” he repeated, trying to reassure her. “It’s just--all these trees remind me of him, y'know? And when we were together.” His breath hitched;  _ God _ , he couldn't break down now, not here.  _ Pull yourself together, Cipher _ . “Sorry, sorry--I--I'm a fucking mess, we should just go back to the car--”

A hand was pressed to his lips silencing him, a hand belonging to no other than the small brunette beside him. “No,” she said firmly. “You’ve gotten  _ this  _ far into the store. You  _ are not _ backing out now.” When Mabel Pines had her heart set on something, there was no stopping that something from happening. “You gotta face your fears, whether or not you’re going to end up winning Dippy back.”

Bill takes a deep breath and blinks away the tears forming at the corners of his eyes. He knew the twin was right; he couldn’t live in fear of all that reminded him of his ex-boyfriend forever. “You’re right. You’re right.” He runs a hand across his face. “I gotta face my fears.”

“Damn right! Now, let’s go find a cart.”

“Cart?” Bill looked down at her, suddenly confused. “I thought we were only getting the hair dye.” They wouldn’t be needing a cart for that.

“Oh, we are,” she assured him, a mischievous smile appearing on her face. “Hair dye  _ is  _ probably the only thing we're buying. The cart is for you, dummy.”

“I'm sorry, what?”

Mabel gave him one of the most deadly serious looks she could possibly muster. “Get in the cart, Billy.”

He almost gagged. Bill wasn’t sure when Mabel became an eldritch monstrosity, nor did he know her tiny body--which he was a good five inches taller than--could contain such power. Despite his disgust at the atrocious nickname, he almost felt compelled to obey. Even though he didn't have a reason to. “ _ Never _ call me that again,” he demanded, trying to resist her authority.

Mabel giggled, suddenly returning back to her old, bubbly self again. “No promises.” 

“If I never call you Billy again, will you get in the cart?”

Bill sighed in defeat. “Sure, whatever.” The blond man climbed into the grocery store cart and curled up into a ball, his knees touching his chin. “Can we hurry this up, please? It’s almost 4, and we gotta get ready for the wedding.”

“It starts at ten!”

“Yeah, but we still gotta get my shit together. We’ve wasted like, 10 minutes here already and I’m still kind of sad.”

“Fine,” she says. “Now, where is that hair spray?”


	4. 3:00 AM - Secrets of the Bride

 

#  **3:00 AM - Secrets of the Bride**

Pacifica hurriedly pulls her clothes back on as she exits the airport’s public bathroom, locking all the lewd pictures she had sent to strange men on the internet. She had been doing this for years--almost as long as she knew Dipper, that cute little piece of meat that, in a few short hours, would be hers and only hers.

Pacifica’s eyes darted around the terminal building, reading the large signs that had text written in English, Spanish and French. Her eyes landed on a sign that said in big, white letters:  **BAGGAGE CLAIM / RECLAMO DE EQUIPAJE / LA LIVRAISON DES BAGAGES** . Dipper’s bride had just come from a two-day trip in Paris to sleep with some other men she had been sexting for a while. She had already made plans beforehand with the men she planned to see, what she didn’t expect was for it to fall so close to her wedding day of all things. 

After grabbing her bag, she walked outside and noticed something off--it seemed the staff didn’t get the memo she was arriving at the airport early. Figures. Still, Pacifica didn’t expect much from them. She pulled out her phone and hit Speed Dial 3 to be met with a simple response.

“You’ve reached the Northwest residence, how may I help you?”

“Yes, this is Pacifica Northwest. I _need_ a designated driver to arrive at the airport.” She paused as the sound of a car rushed passed, causing large splash of water to go flying onto the sidewalk. She grimaced slightly, deciding to keep away from the sidewalk lest she wanted to get her outfit ruined.  “And make that soon.”

“Yes, Miss Northwest, we will send someone on their way shortly.”

“Thank you.” She ended the call, but paused for a brief moment. The text logs of the men she left behind staring back at her in her notifications, but she wouldn't respond to them. Not for now, at least. If anything, what captured her interest was the very man she had been thinking of mere minutes before.

Dipper.

She had seen the messages he sent yesterday, but didn’t have the chance to open them yet. She didn't want to think about her fiancé when she was in the arms of another man.

Pacifica cautiously looked around, even though she had nothing to fear here. No one knew of what she had been doing behind the curtains.

No one seemed to notice her. They didn’t have to, as she was just another number in the hundreds of people waiting here to board or go home. She looked back down at her screen and opened the messages up.

**[9:30 PM]** _ hey I’m sorry for messaging so late but how’s the trip? _

**[9:30 PM]** _ you’re probably sleeping by now but I just wanted to say _

**[9:30 PM]** _ I miss you, like, a lot and I can’t wait to see you tomorrow _

**[9:31 PM]** _ I love you <3 _

Pacifica couldn’t help but smile down at her phone.  _How sweet._  He really didn’t suspect a thing, which was adorable. Guilt overtime had shaped itself into something else and eventually only a fraction of what it used to be. She never felt bad about anything anymore. Besides, what Dipper didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him.

And she was determined to keep him from ever finding out.

**[3:28 AM] the trip was** **_exhausting_ ** **but Paris was beautiful I wish you could have seen it**

**[3:28 AM] I just landed a few minutes ago but I can’t wait to see you too**

**[3:28 AM] <333**

Maybe she could arrange for a trip somewhere besides Paris for their honeymoon; she couldn’t have anyone recognizing her, after all, but still wanted to treat her soon-to-be-husband to someplace nice.

She was snapped out of her thoughts before she could think of anything by the sound of a sleek black car pulling up. Without waiting to be told to, Pacifica gets in the backseat and rests her head against the window, closing her eyes, hoping she can get in a few minutes of sleep.

* * *

 

“Miss Northwest, we’ve arrived,” came the the voice of her driver gently shaking her awake and her eyes fluttered open. The ride back home was over much too soon in Pacifica’s opinion, she had barely closed her eyes and still had fallen asleep for, to her, some unknown amount of time. 

She didn’t feel rested at all.

Everything hurt.

Her driver seemed relieved that she was awake. It made her wonder just how long she’d been sleeping, if only for a brief moment. He politely asked, “Would you like me to carry your bags in?”

“Please, thank you.” She replied, traces of sleep still dripping from her tone as she carefully stepped off of the vehicle. Ignoring the pain that shot up her spine, she walked into the large manor she called her home and instantly felt relief as the warm air from inside hit her. It was especially freezing this time of year and she missed being in the comfort and warmth of her own home; giving off a content sigh, she slid off her coat but froze mid-way as she eyed herself in the full length mirror.

It appeared the make-up around her neck had worn off, revealing a number of markings standing out clearly against her pale skin.

Fuck.

She swore mentally, she’d forgotten just how much of a pain hickies were to hide. It was her fault really, she’d encouraged it after all.

In the heat of the moment, that was.

“Damn it.” she mumbled to herself, “I’m going to have to find a way to hide those somehow.” Glaring at the markings, she slid her coat back on, hiding the marks beneath the layers of fur.

Pacifica takes a seat on a sofa behind her and hid her face in her hands, trying to think of a way to hide the love marks. A single layer of concealer wouldn’t do the trick; she learned that the hard way the day after Dipper’s first time. The frozen spoon trick only works immediately after the sex, and it’s been more than a few hours since the encounter between her and her mysterious sexting partner.

The blonde woman pulled out her phone, opened an incognito browsing tab, and Googled  **how to hide a hickey** . The first result lead to many obvious solutions that never worked for her--frozen spoon, bag of ice, turtlenecks, et cetera.

The last item on the list caught her attention.  **Brush it with a toothbrush** .

Pacifica hadn’t heard of this method before. She read the details with curiosity.

_ I know this sounds weird, but hear me out. Take a brand new, stiff toothbrush, and brush the area of the hickey. Be careful - if you press too hard, you'll make this situation a lot worse. Brush for a few minutes, then wait about 20 minutes, and then apply ice or a frozen spoon. If it looks like it's improving, repeat the process. _

Huh. Weird. Pacifica decided it was worth a try, even if the method was odd and untraditional.

Pacifica sat on her bed, staring at the timer on her phone. She had set it for 20 minutes after brushing the love marks on her neck, just as the website instructed her to do. The clock ticked to zero and she stood up, going to the refrigerator and pulling the spoon she had placed in the freezer earlier to the red area. The website didn’t specify  _ how long _ to press the spoon to her skin for, so she decided to keep it there.

Five or so minutes passed. Pacifica stood in front of the mirror, and to her pleasure, the mark was much less conspicuous than it was half an hour ago. Satisfied with the results and wanting to improve upon them, she repeated the process.

Pacifica glanced at the clock after the steps were finished again. 3:45 AM. It would probably be a good idea to get some sleep.

She enveloped herself in the many sheets on her bed and turned off the lights. She would only have a few short hours of rest before she had to get ready for her wedding.

The blonde woman didn’t know if it was a bad thing she didn’t feel remorse for being unfaithful to Dipper. As far as she was concerned, Dipper was  _ the _ best boyfriend she ever had. That brown-haired cutie always took her out to restaurants, was respectful, found any excuse to spend time with her, and was  _ very good _ at pleasuring her intimately. Sex was one of her favorite things to do with Dipper; she was  _ always _ in the mood and he was always okay with it. It was what Pacifica probably valued the most about him. Pacifica was aware that most people would look down on a woman who thought this way, but she didn’t think it was all that bad. People can get over things. No scar is permanent. As long as it benefitted her, she didn’t have a problem with it. 

This wedding, to her, was more of a publicity stunt than anything. She would have an attractive young man by her side to accompany her in front of all the cameras she faced every day as a Northwest. Who knows, if she ever fell into a rut, she could divorce him and she would get some money and items out of it. While financial trouble for someone of her social status would be unlikely, it would be fun to swim in the spotlight of a broken marriage for a while longer. 

Because Pacifica Northwest was a woman who didn’t care if the world burned as long as she got something out of it.


	5. 4:00 AM - Rumor Has It

#  **4:00 AM: Rumor Has It**

“Soos, did you see this Instagram post?”

Wendy handed her phone to her good friend Soos, who was busy decorating the chapel with streamers, balloons and white flowers. He turned around and took the small, green-cased device in his hands.

An Instagram post showing Pacifica, Dipper’s fiancée, with a man he didn’t recognize was displayed on the screen. They both appeared to be wearing minimal clothing, and the caption read **#after #sex #selfie**.

Soos raised an eyebrow, not wanting to believe Pacifica would ever do something so unthinkable. She was likeable, and so sweet. She wouldn’t.

Right?

“What do you think?” The red-haired woman looked up at her friend. “Pacifica wouldn’t…”

“It’s probably just an old photo. Maybe an ex-boyfriend.”

“The timestamp says 8 hours ago.”

Soos, now panicked, looked at the phone again. Sure enough, **8 HOURS AGO** was written in tiny grey text beneath the caption. “Uhhh…”

“Dude, she was _tagged_ in the photo.” The name tag reading **pacifica_829** was beneath her face. It was tagged to her spam account, the one Dipper had no knowledge of.

“What do you think this means?” Wendy asks.

“I dunno, dude,” Soos says. “Maybe we should pull her aside and talk to her about it? Definitely don’t make a scene.”

Wendy nodded. “Yeah, yeah, good idea. I just wouldn’t want Dipper to marry a woman who is cheating on him.”

“Neither would I. He’s like my brother,” Soos adds.

Wendy takes a deep breath. “Yeah.” Running a hand through her long hair, she says, “Okay, I should probably get back to work.”

Fifteen minutes went by, but Wendy couldn’t seem to get the image of Pacifica with another man out of her head. How would Dipper react to being told such mortifying news? She and him were about as close as he was with Mabel; Wendy couldn’t bear to see him get hurt like that.

Soos’ voice echoed in her head: _“Definitely don’t make a scene_.” Soos was very wise, despite his silliness and immaturity. It was definitely better to ask Pacifica about it in private, away from Dipper.

“Hey, Wendy.” Tambry’s familiar voice carries throughout the entire room.

“Hi, Tambry.” Wendy sounds tired and stressed as the greeting escapes her mouth.

Tambry clears her throat and leans closer to Wendy. “Did you hear about how Pacifica’s fucking other me--”

Wendy quickly slapped a hand over her mouth and shushed her. “TAMBRY!” she whisper-yelled. “SHUT UP! Do you know how LOUD you speak?!”

“Sorry,” she whispered, cringing. “But have you heard?”

Wendy looked around to make sure no one was eavesdropping. “ _Yes_ , Soos showed the photo to me. We’re gonna talk to Pacifica in private; we don’t wanna make a scene.”

Tambry narrows her eyebrows. “You’re joking, right?”

“No.”

Tambry punches Wendy’s arm. “Come _onn_ , Wendy! This girl’s a hoe!”

Wendy shushes her again. “ _Tambry, I SWEAR TO GOD-_ ”

“Shut up, Wendy,” she whisper-yells, taking her wrist and entering the ladies’ room, making sure no one is using it. “You _know_ you want to. Isn’t that little dork important to you?”

The red-haired woman ran a hand across her face in frustration. _Yes_ , it would be nice to revert to her adolescence and break every rule for fun, or to defend one of the most important people in her life. But she was a much more mature woman now. She didn’t solve her problems by lighting a house on fire, or spray-painting a car, or sneaking into abandoned convenience store. Wendy knew making a scene wouldn’t do any good to anyone. “It would be fun, but it would be _wrong_.”

“Since when did we start caring about if things were _wrong_ or not?”

“Since we became _adults_ , Tambry,” she says. “Get your crap together. Crashing a wedding isn’t mature of you.”

Tambry pursed her lips as she exited the bathroom. “You’ll change your mind.”

* * *

 

Pacifica wanted to pull her hair out and murder her _client_. She _told_ him not to post that goddamn photo.

She looked _terrible_ in it.

Her plan to get some sleep wasn’t really working out, as she was on her phone. Scrolling through Instagram, she came across the naked photo of herself in bed with the man she had slept with. She wasn’t even wearing makeup. _And_ he had tagged her spam account in the photo.

Pacifica DM’d the man.

**[4:14 AM]** **delete that fucking photo**

The man responded quickly:

**[4:14 AM]** _wht are you talking about_

**[4:15 AM]** **THE AFTER SEX SELFIE**

**[4:15 AM]** **FUCKING DELETE IT**

**[4:15 AM]** _okay calm down_

Not a minute later, the post was no longer on the man’s Instagram.

**[4:15 AM]** _there happy?_

**[4:16 AM]** **yes**

Pacifica set her phone down, exhaling. She would’ve killed him if he didn’t take the post down. Her hair was messy. She looked like a drunk.

* * *

 

Soos noticed the Instagram post had been deleted.

“Wendy?” Soos turned around, handing his phone to her again, refreshing the strange man’s profile. The so-called “after sex selfie” was nowhere to be seen. “The photo was deleted.”

She quickly took the little black device in her hand and looked at the screen. “Do you think Pacifica told him to delete it?”

“Maybe?” Soos shrugged. “Probably looks bad on her wedding day. Maybe it was an old photo that he decided to post today.”

Wendy pondered that thought for a moment. It would make sense for Pacifica to not want a photo like that leaked on her wedding day, especially since Dipper could very well see it and jump to the wrong idea, even if it _was_ an older photo.

She frowned a bit while in thought.

But why would it be posted on _today_ of all days? It can’t be a coincidence that it was posted a few hours before her wedding day.

“Or she could’ve gotten busy on her two-day _business_ trip,” another voice chimed in as if reading her thoughts. Soos and Wendy both jumped at the noise and whirled their heads around to see a familiar face.

“Jeez, Robbie! Way to scare the hell out of us! What are you doing here?” she asked, distracted from her thoughts. She hadn’t seen him in a while due to how busy the guy was now. It was still surprising how much the other had changed over the years turning from and edgy teen to, dare she say, respectable company. In fact if anyone had told Wendy he’d ditch his old worn out hoodie for a business suit she probably wouldn’t have believed them.

“Yeah, dude. I thought you were a funeral director now?” Soos added, a bit confused as to what a person who planned funerals was doing at a wedding set up.

“Just because I plan funerals most of the time doesn’t mean I don’t know a thing or two about flower arrangements.” he huffed, “Pretty much the only reason I’m here.”

“No way.” Now that had her surprised, _“You’re_ on flower arrangement?”

“I worked as a florist in college, Wendy.” Not to mention this wasn’t his first time arranging flowers for a wedding. “I know what I’m doing.”

“I know, I know but I’m still surprised Pacifica chose you to do it.” Especially considering how picky the Northwest was.

Robbie shrugged. “She liked my work; besides, I heard the short stack was getting married. I wasn’t going to pass up this opportunity.” He’d be lying if he didn’t think the kid could get married, especially to _her_ of all people. “Speaking of..” he said in a more hushed tone, trying not to alert the other workers to their conversation, “He didn’t see the photo, did he?”

Wendy paused. “Well...I don’t think so. I _hope_ not.” He couldn’t have seen the photo--if he had, he would have texted her immediately. “He’s probably sleeping, no one's _awake_ at this hour.”

“Except Pacifica,” Tambry mumbled from her seat, drawing all eyes to her. “What? That’s the only way the photo could’ve been taken down so quickly," she reasoned, and for once everyone fell silent in thought.

“I wouldn’t be surprised,” Robbie spoke up. “She _did_ just come back from a two-day trip to Paris.”

Wendy looked over to him, eyebrows knitted. “Just came back?”

“As in an hour ago, yeah. Or according to her staff anyway.”

She hadn’t known this--not until now, anyway. If anything, she thought Pacifica had come back yesterday. Pacifica wouldn’t have wanted to be late for her own wedding... _right?_

Soos was the one who asked the inevitable question. “How do you know this?”

“I was asking if she would make it today. If not, I’d have to reschedule the whole flower arrangement,” Robbie explained.

That made sense. Flowers wilt, after all.

The room seemed to fall silent again, the others' movements around them nothing but background noise. White noise that reminded her of television static falls flat on Wendy’s ears and her eyes were glued to a photo that wasn’t there any more, with reasons dawning on her mind as to why it had even slipped past them in the first place.

Soos was the one who broke the silence with a simple question, one that was inching close to the answer on everyone’s mind.

“Is it normal for the bride to not see the groom for days like that?”

Wendy’s throat went dry at the question, she looked down at the phone in her hand struggling for an answer. “I--I don’t know.”

“Sure sounds suspicious if you ask me.” Tambry followed, “Suspicious enough that we should maybe tell a certain someone about it-”

“We _can’t_ tell Dipper.” Wendy cut in firmly. “We still don’t know for sure.” But even _Wendy’s_ resolve was starting to crack here. As much as she didn’t want to believe it, all signs seemed to point to that one sinking suspicion:

That Pacifica was cheating on Dipper.

That Dipper was being played for a fool.

That Pacifica wasn’t the person she made herself out to be.

Her stomach was in knots just thinking about it.

“But we have to do _something!_ " Tambry insisted. "Can't just let the poor kid marry a hoe.”

“I’m with Tambry here.” Robbie followed up, setting a hand on the woman’s shoulder as he continued. “I don’t like that twerp very much, but I definitely wouldn't wish that on anyone." If this were any other situation, Wendy would have laughed at his lame insult, but laughing didn’t do much to stop her feelings of dread and worry.

She shook her head. “I wouldn't wish that on anyone, either.” Especially Dipper. He was like a brother to her and she would do anything to protect him, even if he was capable of doing that himself. “But we can’t jump to conclusions yet.” That didn’t do anyone any good. “Even if things look really bad for her." Tambry opened her mouth to speak again but Wendy continued before she got a chance. “We aren’t going to stand around and do nothing. Soos and I are going to talk to her when she gets here and get this all sorted out, okay?”

It was silent for a moment before Tambry sighed, “Okay.” She begrudgingly accepted that. By the looks of it, she seemed to be reconsidering becoming an adult.

Wendy didn’t blame her.

“Alright. Now everyone get back to work, this wedding isn’t going to plan itself out!” she ordered. They’d already spent enough time dwelling on a picture and not getting anything done. The wedding was approaching soon enough which meant they had to get back on schedule if they wanted to get things done on time.

As everyone got up, Tambry sinking off to her station, Robbie brushed passed her with a small glance. “I hope you know what you’re doing," he said, quiet.

Wendy smiled. "I hope I do, too."

They both left and she let out a sigh of her own. _Was this really the right decision?_  

Soos walked over setting a hand on her shoulder. “Well what do we do now?” he asked, just as worried or if not more than she was.

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “We play the waiting game.”


	6. 5:00 AM - William

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, sorry this chapter was updated so late in the day. We've been busy and procrastinating. :D

#  **5:00 AM - William**

Mabel squealed as she admired her handiwork in the mirror. Bill’s disguise was done, and he was a completely different person. “Ohmigosh,  _ Bill! _ Look!”

The brunette had used makeup to make Bill’s skin appear a little lighter. His hair was now a midnight black, and he was wearing a pink button-down collar shirt. His dress pants were black, as well. He was wearing colored contacts so his eyes appeared blue, and not hazel. She had also made him put on a different cologne so his smell wouldn’t be familiar. Bill Cipher was no longer Bill Cipher, no, he was someone else.

“Can you do the accent?”

Bill raised an eyebrow. “What accent?”

“Dipper says you do a really good British accent!”

The man in disguise groans. “When did he tell you that?”

“When you two were still dating,” she replies. “I remembered it because I’ve been waiting for an excuse for you to use it!”

Bill bit his lip. It was a miracle Mabel wanted to help him at all, so he better play his cards right if he wants to win Dipper back. “Fine,” Bill says, turning on the deep accent. “ _ This _ is my British accent. Are you happy?”

Mabel squeals again. “OH MY GOD, IT’S SO  _ GOOD! _ ” She pulls him into a tight embrace, making him grimace. He actually enjoyed her hugs, but he would never say that out loud. When she pulls away, she asks, “Can you do that for the whole day?”

Bill’s eyes widen. In his true voice, he exclaims, “What the  _ fuck _ ?! It’s 5 in the morning! The wedding’s at 1pm!”

“You have to get used to it!” Mabel counters. “You can’t break character in the middle of the wedding!”

He groans again. “Fine,” he says, reverting back to the accent. “I’ll do my best.”

“Thank you!” Mabel hugged him again, and Bill bit the inside of his cheek to keep the smile from appearing on his face. 

The hyperactive brunette takes his hand and leads him into the living room. She takes her laptop from the coffee table and plops down on the couch, opening up the device. “We need to create an alternate _ identity _ for you,” Mabel says. “What’s a name you’ve always wanted to have?” Bill sits down on the couch next to her, sitting on his hands. “That Dip doesn’t know about, obviously,” she adds quickly.

Bill stares at the wall behind Mabel for a moment. There’s really nothing that Dipper  _ doesn’t _ know about him. “Maybe it would be better to choose a name I’d hate,” he says. “Your brother knows everything about me.”

Mabel nods. A few seconds of silence pass before the brunette giggles to herself, typing something up on her laptop. “How ‘bout Billy?”

“Hard pass,” Bill groans. “Besides, that would be too obvious. There’s no room for dumbassery in a plan as elaborate as this.”

Mabel pouts. “Pleeeease?”

“No!”

“You have a shitty sense of humor!”

“You say that like it’s a surprise. I call myself Billshit, Mabel.”

Mabel frowns. “Fine,” she says, hitting “backspace” on her keyboard a few times. A moment passes before she says, “How about William?”

Bill blinks. “No.”

“Why not? It’s British-sounding! And it’s the long form of Bill, right?”

“That’s exactly why not,” he says. “Too obvious.”

“But you look NOTHING like yourself! He won’t figure it out! Besides, if  _ William _ reminds him of  _ Bill _ , that only means he still loves you! So it would be even easier to get it out of him and record him!”

The way she put it made it sound so sinister. “You’re evil.”

“Tell me something I don’t know,” she says, typing on her computer. “This is happening.”

* * *

 

Mabel and Bill spent the next fifteen minutes building up the character of William, figuring out the fine details from his favorite foods, to his MBTI type. It was more work than Bill thought was necessary, but again, he didn’t want to protest. He needed all the help he could get. Meanwhile, Dipper continued to lose his shit.

He woke up much earlier than he had hoped he would--5 am. He dreamed of being in Bill’s arms, sharing kisses and doing other risqué activities.

Bill was like a demon perched on his shoulder, fucking up his happiness.  _ Why the hell was he still thinking about him? _ He didn’t want to believe Mabel was right about how he still loved him, as that was impossible. He was  _ so glad _ to be marrying Pacifica. He couldn’t be happier. He was ECSTATIC. He loved her.

Definitely no doubt about it.

But...Dipper  _ liked _ to recall memories of him and Bill together. He really enjoyed thinking about the moments they shared when everything seemed so much easier, from the warm press of the blonde’s lips against his for the very first time to fleeting moments that would leave him dizzy and aching for more, to sweet nothings they’d whisper to each other before finally falling asleep in each others’ comfort.

Dipper groaned. It was too early to be thinking about this. He shouldn’t even be thinking about  _ him  _ either but.. It seemed his mind didn’t get the memo that he was supposed to focus on the present and not linger on the past.

Or what could have been.

With a heavy sigh he looked over at the alarm clock on the nightstand, reading in red bright numbers. 

**5:36 AM**

Eight hours until the wedding.

Eight hours, twenty-four minutes and thirteen seconds.

Half of which he could spend actually getting some sleep for once in his life instead of thinking about things he wasn’t supposed to be thinking about at five the the morning.

It was really, too early to be thinking about this again for the second time today when everyone else was most likely sleeping or doing something other than thinking about the memories they shared with their ex-boyfriend--who they haven’t had a decent conversation with in literal years--and especially so on the very day they were supposed to get married to someone else and spend the rest of their life with.

He should have been happier about that.

“For fuck's sake,” he swore into his palms. He was going to drive himself up the wall with this all because of Bill.  It was easier to blame Bill than himself. Or admit that he had feelings for him still.

But he wasn't going to do that. Because it wasn't true. He didn't love Bill.

He _couldn’t_ love Bill, because he loved Pacifica.

_ "Denial isn’t just a river in Egypt, Dipper!" _

He could practically hear Mabel saying that to him. As the thought of his sister crossed his mind, he couldn’t help but wonder what she was doing at this hour.

_Probably sleeping by now,_ he thought to himself, as everyone else should be.

Although, it wouldn’t hurt anyone to check.

* * *

 

Bill re-entered the room with more mac ’n cheese in hand. He figured he might as well help himself to what was left from earlier, and Mabel  _ did  _ say he could have at it with any snacks as long as he was here. He glanced over at the brunette who was bundled in a pink blanket and hunched over her laptop screen. “Are you ever going to go to get some sleep?”

“Sleep is for weak minds with even weaker responsibilities,” Mabel mumbled, not even glancing up from the cover story written out on her computer. She wanted to memorize every detail to make things go according to plan. This had to work. After all, they couldn’t afford any slip-ups. She re-adjusted her position on the couch before taking yet another shot of what had to be her fourth glass of Mabel Juice tonight. Bill was admittedly concerned about her and decided take the blend of glittery nightmare fuel. He didn’t miss the glare the smaller woman sent his way.

“I’m just thinking that’s enough for now,” he explained, trying to keep up the British accent the best he could. He was definitely going to get sick of this very quickly. “Besides, I think you might need some amount of sleep before we go to the wedding. Unless you want to end up looking like a zombie.”

“What about you?” she asked, catching him off guard for a moment. “Aren’t you tired?” 

He shrugged, “I couldn’t sleep even if I wanted to.” Insomnia was a wonderful thing, really. “You look like you need sleep more than I do anyway.”

Mabel stared him down hard before finally easing up and giving a heavy sigh, “Alright, alright. I guess I could use a little nap.” She carefully got up and stretched out, her legs were a little sore from sitting criss-crossed. Though, she was glad they hadn’t gone numb. Blanket still wrapped around her shoulders, she walked over to the doorway, “Wake me up in an hour, ‘kay?”

“Will do.”

“Thanks, _Billiam_.”

He shoots her a sharp glance. Mabel grins in response. He rolls his eyes at her, throwing one of the throw pillows at her. “Go to bed, you twat.” 

Mabel laughed, only barely avoiding being hit by it. “Okay! Okay! Night, Bill!”

“Goodnight.” And with that, she left the room and Bill was left alone again.

It was moments like these where he really wished he could sleep right; , he could pass the time easier. Or not be left alone to his thoughts. Glancing over at the laptop left on the coffee table in front of him, he sighed. _Might as well brush up on the cover story once more_. Maybe if he got tired of it, he could just watch a movie or something.

He’d almost finished reading the details over when he heard a phone ring. He looked over to see Mabel’s phone on the couch.

She’d left it behind.

Bill probably should have just left it alone, but the question of who would be calling star at this hour overpowered his respect for Mabel's privacy.

He took the phone in his hand and froze once he saw who the call was from.

_Dipper_.

From the caller ID he knew it was his Pine Tree. He knew he shouldn’t answer. The call wasn’t for him, after all. And Dipper wouldn’t take kindly to hearing _his_ voice on his _sister's phone_ of all things. He’d jump to conclusions, or suspect something, or hate him even more. The kid wasn’t stupid but he didn’t want to give Dipper even more reasons to loathe him. As the phone rung again, an idea came to him. He didn’t have to use _his_ voice to answer it. Dipper hadn’t heard the accent in a while, so he _definitely_ wouldn’t remember it now. With a moment of hesitation, Bill gave into temptation and picked up the phone, gently sliding the ‘answer’ button.

“Oh hey--I didn’t expect you to answer. What are you doing up so late, Mabel?”

He hated how his heart clenched, but he couldn’t help it. That was the most he’d heard from Dipper in ages.

He missed his voice _so_ much.

“Mabel?”

Bill mentally swore. _Right._ He couldn’t just stay quiet and breathe into the phone like some creep. (Well, he _could_ , but that probably wouldn’t be the best idea now.)  He took a small breath and responded.

“I’m sorry, Mabel’s resting.” There was a long silence on the other end, clearly Pine Tree didn’t expect someone else to be answering the phone. That, or he knew who he was.  He prayed for the latter as he continued. “Who is this?”

“...I’m her brother, Dipper.” The was a shuffle heard on the other side, faint but Bill could make it out. “Who are you...and what are you doing with Mabel’s phone?”

Despite the obvious apprehensiveness he heard in Dipper’s voice, Bill couldn’t describe the sense of relief he felt at that moment knowing Dipper didn’t remember. He ignored the small bit of sadness that came with it. 

“Ah, I’m sorry we haven’t met before, you can call me William.” The name sounded strange on his tongue, he still didn’t like it. “I’m your sister’s date to your wedding. We've been seeing each other for a while now.”

“Oh," came his soft response, as if whatever conclusions Dipper was coming to faded away. He could already picture the sheepish look on the other’s face. “That still doesn’t answer what you’re doing with Mabel’s phone. Haven’t you ever heard of privacy, man?”

And there was the sass he knew and loved. His heart _ached_ like hell.

“My apologies, I just had to find out who ‘Sir Dippingsauce’ was,” he lied with ease. He had to remind himself that even if Bill Cipher knew him all too well, William didn’t. He hadn’t even met the kid. “I suppose it was rather rude of me to answer someone else’s call.” 

“Yeah.” Dipper agreed. “It is.”

“Sorry,” Bill apologized once more and a beat of silence passed through them both. He could have sworn the other hung up if it weren’t for the faint shuffling noises. It sounded like the other was pacing. He could visualize it.

Bill decided to break the silence. “If you don’t mind me asking, what are you doing up so early?” he asked. It was an innocent question. “Shouldn’t you be sleeping?”

He didn’t expect Dipper to respond, he was pretty much a stranger to him so really. Dipper didn’t have to respond, if anything he expected him to hang up.

He was pleasantly surprised when he didn’t.

“Yeah...I guess I should be. I mean, I _tried_ sleeping. It didn’t work for long though.” A sigh was heard on the other end. “I’m just... _nervous_ , I guess. I’m getting married in a few hours to a beautiful woman, the love of my life and...I just don’t want to mess it up, you know?”

“I know how that is.” He tried to sympathize, biting his tongue. He wanted to say something, _anything_. Absolutely anything to change Dipper’s mind because those words hurt more than they were supposed to. He could remember when Dipper called _him_ that. 

“Do you?”

“I’ve had my fair share of experiences,” Bill replied, trying to keep his voice even and calm. He couldn’t fuck this up now, not when Mabel put in so much work. “I may not...be the best person to tell you this, but I’m sure you won’t mess _anything_ up.” He looked down at the coffee table and picked up one of Mabel’s character erasers. The watermelon one was particularly squishy. “You’re nervous _now_ but...I’m sure things will turn out fine. You’ll be happily married and have a happily ever after with the person of your dreams.” It pained him to say that, he wanted to scream. “Don’t overthink it, a chance like this only comes once in a lifetime, after all.”

Another beat of silence passed before Dipper responded. “Thanks. I really needed to hear that.” He could hear the smile in the other's voice. For once, it hurt him. He wished he could take back everything he said. He swallowed the heavy feeling in his throat. 

“Anytime.” He held in a breath. “You should probably try getting some more sleep.” He’d need it.

“Yeah. I’ll try. Thanks again. It was really nice talking to you, William.”

“Likewise, Dipper. I’ll see you at the wedding.”

“Yeah, see you.” And with that, the call ended. Bill fell back onto the couch with a loud groan as he buried his face into his palms. He hated himself and every decision he’d made up until this point. He hated that his ex-boyfriend was marrying someone else, and he really hated the holidays now.

“Fuck my life,” he groaned. How he desperately wished he could sleep it all away.


	7. 6:00 AM - Stress

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is being posted at 11:55 PM. We're sorry it took so long again. But we're technically not breaking our promise! :D

#  **6:00 AM - Stress**

Wendy couldn’t keep it together.

She had been battling her internal conflict for the past two hours, since the 4 am Instagram post of Pacifica with the strange man. Her adolescent side (which was still very much alive at twenty-four years old) was screaming at her to trash the party, to call her out and stop Dipper from marrying her. If it had been seven years ago, she would’ve done that already. However, as a _mature_ , twenty-four year old woman, she had to show restraint when it came to facing these kinds of things.

Tambry had been basically _begging_ her to join her in ruining the wedding, and as _much as she longed to_ , she just couldn’t bring herself to agree. What if the picture wasn’t what it seemed to be? They’d be ruining the most important day of Dipper’s life for nothing!

That was probably her biggest fear in this situation: jumping to incorrect conclusions and wreaking unnecessary havoc.

Wendy had a nagging fear at the back of her mind that Tambry was going to do something irrational and stupid, that she wasn’t going to listen to what Wendy said. She wouldn’t wait for Pacifica to get here. That wasn’t her nature. Tambry wouldn’t want to wait 2 hours for confirmation or denial of her unfaithfulness to Dipper.

As Wendy paces the pews in the church corridor, she can’t help but to hear an exchanging of words between two familiar voices. She tiptoed closer to the door the sound was coming from so she could eavesdrop.

“...And then, I’ll wreck the wedding hall...you destroy the cake…”

 _No_.

“Tambry! Robbie!” Wendy chimed in, disgusted by their secret plans to disregard Wendy and crash the celebration. “Come _on_! What are you guys doing?!”

“ _The right thing_ ,” Tambry says defensively. “And what the hell are you doing, eavesdropping on our conversation? This doesn’t involve _you_!”

Wendy scoffs. “ _Me?_ Haven’t _you_ people ever heard of closing the _goddamn_ door?!” Besides, it's better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality! NOT crashing a wedding!"

Tambry laughs humorlessly. “ _Poise and rationality_ ? Wendy, you _know_ we don’t do that!”

“Well, you need to START doing that.” Wendy’s voice was authoritative and rather frightening now, a result of her growing anger, stress and worry. “ _Tambry, we are ADULTS._ You need to STOP thinking that you can solve _everything_ by starting a riot. We will _talk_ to Pacifica when she gets here. End. Of. Story.”

Tambry bites her lip before saying, “Fine. Fine. We’ll do things _your_ way.” Robbie shoots her a dirty look as they leave the room. Wendy exhales, wanting to be rid of all of this stress originating from a single Instagram post.

* * *

Dipper couldn't keep it together.

He didn’t know if he was really happy with Pacifica. After a re-analyzation of their relationship, he’s having serious second thoughts.

Pacifica seemed to think of herself more than she thought of him, a stark contrast to the first half of his relationship with Bill. There was one specific night he could never get over.

_Dipper closed the door to his apartment, setting his bag on the floor and falling onto the couch. He was incredibly tired and didn’t have energy for anything._

_Pacifica, his girlfriend who was staying with him for a few days, came into the living room and wrapped her arms around him. Seductively pressing a kiss to his neck, she whispered into his ear, “Hello, Mason.”_

_Dipper groaned. “Pacifica, I’m really tired.”_

_She continues to press kisses down his neck, ignoring what he just said. “Do you wanna come to the bedroom with me?”_

_“Pacifica,” he said, louder this time. “I’m sorry, but, I’m tired.”_

_The blonde woman raked her nails along Dipper’s scalp, trying her hardest to get Dipper in the mood. “Please, Dipper?”_

_“No!” he exclaimed. “Pacifica, when I say ‘I’m tired,’ what do you hear?”_

_Pacifica pouted. “I just wanna spend some time with my boyfriend!”_

_“Does that time_ always _have to be sexual?”_

_Pacifica sat up, eyebrows furrowed. “Excuse me?”_

_“You have to be conscious of my feelings, too, y'know,” Dipper said. “It's not just about you. I'm important, too. I'm not your sex toy.”_

_Dipper didn't know why he was so mad all of a sudden. Pacifica had done this many times before, but the lack of sleep over the past week made him irritable. Pacifica stormed off to bed without saying another word to him. When he came to bed, she had passed out on her vibrator._

The memory of that night still haunts him. Dipper scratched his head frantically, trying to convince himself he loved her. But if you have to _convince_ yourself you love someone, do you really love them?

One month ago, the thought of Bill re-entered his mind. He had almost forgotten about Bill until he was reminded of his existence when he scrolled through one of his Tweets which happens to appear on his timeline. It was a humorous tweet commenting on how he was staying home for Thanksgiving and binge-eating turkey. Ever since then, happy memories of his past relationship had been flooding his consciousness. Dipper tried to push it to the back of his head, but every day, the fear kept getting bigger. And today, it's reached its peak.

Perhaps the worst memory—even worse than failure to respect Dipper's emotions—was when Pacifica had cheated on him when he was eighteen.

But he didn't want to think about that. She wouldn't do that again. She's changed and matured over the years. Yes, she was definitely the right person to marry.

He didn't need to be thinking about Bill at all. He _loved_ Pacifica, so why was this blond man stressing him out so much?

And as if _that_ wasn't stressful enough, Mabel's _date_ wasn't making things easier. Dipper had a thing for British accents. He hated himself for turning beet red when he heard William's deep, silky voice for the first time. Where did Mabel find someone with a voice like _that_?

Dipper slaps himself across the face. “Stop!” he yells at himself, not caring about whether he looks insane or not. He was alone, so it didn't matter. Now he was lusting after a man he didn't even _know_?

He slouched down, exhaling and wondering what the hell his life has come to. Maybe it was all just pre-martial anxiety, and this would all clear up after the ceremony.

Yes, it was definitely that. This wasn't a big deal. Dipper could just brush it off.

He loved Pacifica, no doubt about it.

* * *

 

Bill couldn't keep it together.

He and Mabel chatted over breakfast, enjoying some pancakes Mabel made in a surprisingly short amount of time. The anxiety and heartache from the phone call were still fresh. 

“Mabel?”

She made a noise that meant “you have my attention” without saying a word. Her mouth was filled with food, so she couldn't speak.

Bill opens his mouth and hesitates before saying, "Pine Tree called last night. After you went to bed.” A large part of him hoped he was calling about him, albeit it was incredibly unlikely.

The brunette woman quickly swallowed the pancakes. “Say what, now?”

“He called you. Guess he wanted to talk to you since he was feeling nervous and all, y'know?”

“He was totally calling about _you_!” Mabel squeals. “Did you answer in your William voice?”

He took another bite of his breakfast. “Yeah.”

“What did he say?”

“He thought I was really William. He told me he was nervous and all that and I just gave him some advice. Nothing too big.”

“What advice did you give him?”

“Eh, just the stereotypical you'll-do-fine bullshit everyone says. He probably doesn't even remember it.”

Mabel pulls out her phone and hits Speed Dial 6. “I'm calling Dipper.”

“Why?” A sinking feeling settled in his stomach, though he didn't know why.

“Because he wanted to talk to me,” she whispers. “And then I'll be talking to you, too!” Mabel disappears into her room as Dipper picks up the phone. She responds to him with a “Hey, what's up?”

Bill slouched in his chair, exhaling. Who was he kidding? Dipper didn't love him! He had no reason to love him! Pacifica was  _way_ better than him in every way. Pine Tree deserves better.

And there would never be anything he could do to change that.

Stress was piling on top of him, and it didn't show any signs of stopping. But there wasn't any backing out of the plan now. Dipper knows _William_ exists; he has to commit to this plan.

Whether or not this was going to work, he knew today was going to be the worst day of his life.


	8. 7:00 AM - Calling Sir Dippingsauce

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We should start pre-writing these chapters again.  
> Here's 7:00 AM, posted at 10:50 PM. Yeah, we write these things at night.

#  **7:00 AM - Calling Sir Dippingsauce**

To take his mind off of his worries, Dipper decides to watch his favorite sitcom, _Everybody Loves Raymond_. Over the somewhat corny jokes and audience laughter coming from the television, the BABBA song “Disco Girl” begins ringing throughout the room. Looking down at his lap, he sees his phone is buzzing and Mabel’s photo, accompanied by green and red phone icons, is displayed on his cell phone’s screen.

He picks up the small, black device and taps the green phone icon, answering the call. “Mabel?”

“Hey, what’s up?”

Dipper raises an eyebrow, momentarily confused. “Why are you calling?”

“William told me that you called last night after I went to bed, so I’m calling back, dummy,” she quips. “What did you want to talk about?”

Dipper exhales. “Nothing, I was just...still doubting myself. Being nervous, I guess. Basically the same thing I called about at midnight?”

“You can’t stop thinkin’ about your ex?”

He cringes. “I mean...yeah, but you don’t have to put it like _that_ . _Please_ don’t put it like that.”

Mabel giggles. “Sorry. Can’t help it.”

“Yeah, I know you can’t. So what’s bothering you about Bill?”

Dipper exhales, unsure if he should really be saying this out loud. “I--I might be having second thoughts about the wedding.”

Mabel froze, unsure of whether or not to feel happy or sad. “What?”

“I _hate_ that I’m thinking about this, Mabel, but I don’t know how to _stop_ it!” Dipper hasn’t felt more stressed out in his life. “I just feel like I’m making the biggest mistake of my life, but I know I shouldn’t, because Bill’s an ASSHOLE!”

Mabel sighs. “ _Relax_ , Dipper. This is probably just...anxiety trying to get the best of you.”

“That’s what I tried to tell myself for the past hour, Mabel. It didn’t work. I don’t want to be lied to, Mabel.”

She bit her tongue. “That’s pretty hypocritical, coming from you.”

“I’m sorry?”

“You say you don’t want to be lied to, but you keep denying you still have feelings for Bill.”

_Ouch._ That was uncharacteristically harsh. “I _can’t_ have feelings for Bill. I _don’t_. He ghosted me for no reason and I still don’t know why! I hate him!”

“Then why do you care _so_ much about him on your _wedding day_ ? Come the _hell_ on, Dipper! YOU LOVE BILL!”

Dipper felt his a lump in his throat, and breathing became more difficult. Without thinking, he takes the phone from his ear and presses the red “hang up” button. He didn’t need Mabel--or anyone--to speak to him like that right now.

_He did NOT love Bill._

Running a hand across his face, he knew he needed to relax. Granted, he had been telling himself that a million times over the past seven hours, so it seems his plans to take his mind off Bill have not worked. Taking a shower led to accidental masturbation. Calling his sister just resulted in an argument. And texting his fiancé…

Actually, he hadn’t responded to the messages Pacifica had left him yet. He knew she was back on American soil now, and would be preparing for the wedding shortly. He opened the messages app and sent a quick message to Pacifica. Maybe reminding him of why he proposed in the first place would help him forget about his ex.

**[7:20 AM]** **hey sweetheart**

Pacifica texted back almost instantly; it was one of her many admirable qualities.

**[7:20 AM]** _hi bby i’m great <3 ready for the wedding?_

**[7:20 AM] ye just very very nervous**

Technically, he wasn’t lying to her.

**[7:20 AM]** _aweeeee don’t be!! You’ll be fine and we’re gonna be together forever finally!_

**[7:20 AM] yeah you’re right**

**[7:20 AM] i shouldn’t be freaking out**

**[7:21 AM]** _ofc not!! It’s gonna be great! Ily!_

**[7:21 AM]** **i love you too**

He sighed. Pacifica was an amazing woman, and he _definitely_ loved her. He was already feeling a little more relaxed after the brief exchange, but guilt from his and Mabel’s fight was still lingering. Wedding days are supposed to be happy, but this was anything but. This was stressful and worrisome.

Dipper laid back down on the sofa and continued to watch _Everybody Loves Raymond_ on the TV, forgetting it was still playing in the background. This was his favorite episode--Season 7 Episode 9, entitled “ _She’s The One_.” In this episode, Robert meets a nice woman he falls in love with quickly and insists that she’s The One for him. The rest of the family supports him until Ray witnesses said woman eat a fly. After Robert goes to her apartment, she finds out she’s a frog-obsessed freak show. It was hilarious and never failed to laugh--usually.

But this day was different.

It was near the end of the episode, and Robert and his family are in the living room, discussing why Robert can’t seem to commit to a single woman. His condescending, narcissistic mother Marie, says to him, “ _Robbie, honey, I know what you're going through, and I can help you. I just want you, once and for all, to say it to me._ ”

He responds, “ _What are you talking about? Say what to you?_ ”

“ _That you’re homosexual!_ ”

“ _MA!_ ” he exclaims in disgust.

“ _Just say it, you’ll feel better!_ ” she insists.

“ _No, I’m not saying it! This again?!_ ”

Dipper chuckled softly, the humor bringing him brief relief.

“ _A woman ate a fly?! Nobody believes your stories, Robbie! Just say it!_ ”

“ _No!_ ”

“' _I’m a gay.’”_ Marie spreads her arms out wide, demonstrating how easy it would be for him to come out as homosexual.

“ _What?!_ ” Robert was clearly tired of his mother constantly insisting he was gay.

“ _You’ll feel better! ‘Hello, I’m queer, and now I’m here!’”_ she continues to pressure him.

“ _Who says that?_ ” Ray, his brother, asks.

“ _It’s the slogan_ ,” Marie responds. “ _Just admit it already!_ ”

“ _NO!_ ” he yells. “ _Would you STOP?!_ ”

Marie stands up in frustration. “ _Well, then, what is it? Because I can't take it anymore. You're torturing me, do you know that? You are into your forties, and still you can't settle down. I stay up nights tossing and turning in my bed because I'm so sick about it. I just want you to be with someone- anyone- I don't care who it is. I mean, for God's sakes, do you want to die alone?!_ ”

“ _Yes!_ ” his father, Frank, quips. “ _Oh,_ _him_ _.”_

_“Ma, I saw that girl_ eat a fly _!”_ Raymond insists.

“ _Stop it, Raymond! Why can’t you just accept that your brother is different?”_ The elderly woman turns to Robert. “ _I accept you, Robbie._ ”

Emotionally exhausted, he says, “ _Ma, I would love nothing more than to tell you I’m gay._ ”

Frank throws his hands up in the air. “ _Marie, look what you’re doing!_ ”

“ _But I’m not, Dad, alright? So you can unclench your intestines. I wish I had a good reason for why I’m always striking out. But I don’t. It’s me._ It’s me. _Most people find their other half. And I just have to wake up and accept that maybe there is no other half… for_ this _._ ” He gestures to himself as he finishes saying this. Robert exits the room despite his family members’ protests.

Dipper’s heart sank in his chest. He remembered watching this exact episode with Bill a few years ago.

_Bill and Dipper were cuddled up on the couch, eating popcorn and rewatching Dipper’s favorite_ Everybody Loves Raymond _episode._

_“Damn,” Bill said as he took another handful of popcorn. “Robert has the shittiest dating luck in the world.”_

_“Yeah,” Dipper agreed as he moved closer to him, resting his hand on his chest. “What would you do if you were in that situation?”_

_Bill thought for a moment. “I’d probably just stop dating. I mean, if you keep failing that many times, what’s the point?” He pressed a kiss to Dipper’s cheek. “Glad I’m not in that position.”_

_Dipper giggled. “Me too. I love you.”_

_“I love you too.”_

Dipper blinked away the memory, trying to forget about him. Though, the last scene of this episode doesn’t help.

Robert goes to a bar to drink away his feelings when he accidentally trips a waiter carrying three margaritas. He drops them all and they spill on a group of three women at a table. As the waiter gets up and helps clean up the mess he inadvertently made, Robert notices one of the women at the table is his on-again-off-again ex-girlfriend, Amy.

The credits follow.

It was all he could do not to throw the remote at the television. It was as if the universe was _trying_ to make him think about Bill.

“What did he say?”

Mabel had barely sat back down in her seat before Bill asked her this question. She had a frustrated look on her face. “He doesn’t want to accept he still loves you.”

Bill raises an eyebrow. “Come again?”

Mabel exhales angrily. “He’s in _total_ denial. He doesn’t want to admit he still has feelings for you.”

“There’s no way he could love me,” Bill says. “I--I was an idiot.”

“Yes, we all know,” Mabel says. “And I don’t know why he loves you. But he _does_.”

“Are you saying he doesn’t love Pacifica?”

“No,” Mabel responds. “I’m saying that he is conflicted. He _did_ say he was having second thoughts about the wedding.”

“Oh, bullshit!”

“No shit here!” she tells him. “Just tea.”

Bill rolls his eyes. “Your tea is fake.”

“Hey, I’m telling you the truth,” she says, taking her plate to the sink and setting it there. “And if you don’t believe me, then there’s nothing I can do. Tough shit, _William_.”

Bill glares at her as she leaves the room. Even though he kept denying it, Bill desperately wished she was right about this one. Mabel didn’t have a good reason to lie to him--other than revenge--but she didn’t seem to want to guilt trip him. It’s been _seven years_ , so telling him to eat mac n’ cheese like ass was probably enough guilt. Bill hoped she knew what she was doing. _Maybe_ , just _maybe_ , he still had a chance with Dipper. Who knows, Pacifica could divorce him at any moment, albeit unlikely. Even if a romance with Dipper was out the window, with Mabel’s cunning plan, he sensed that in the future, he might have a little bit of closure with him.


	9. 8:00 AM - The Sociopath, The Conflicted One, and The Impostor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Damn, we're just gonna keep updating at 11PM aren't we?  
> We're sorry.  
> Here's Chapter 9.

#  **8:00 AM - The Sociopath, The Conflicted One, and The Impostor**

Pacifica played with her hair as she lay on her back in bed, feeling _empty_. Not sad, not angry, not regretful. Simply empty.

She didn’t _dislike_ feeling empty; it was much better than being filled with _emotion_ like a freak. She found it to be a waste of time, to cry over little things that, with time, wouldn’t be big deals at all. She didn’t _tell_ people not to mourn or take breaks because of emotional exhaustion; unlike some people, Pacifica _held_ her tongue.

Pacifica wondered why everyone else didn’t see the world the way _she_ saw it. She saw the world like a chess board, moving the pawns to your advantage to get what you want or need. Over the years, she’s developed a knack for moving the pieces to the right places. Making Dipper fall in love was one of the easiest games she’s played. This marriage would only add onto that match. When she divorces him, it might as well be a checkmate.

She is going to win.

This isn’t to say that she didn’t enjoy her time with Dipper--no, she did love him. If love was a sense of power and domination, or a sense of control, rather than an _emotion_ , she loved him. Pacifica didn’t know if Dipper loved her the same way, or the way most humans love. Truth be told, she had a hard time telling. Eventually, she stopped caring.

Some people say, “There’s something wrong with you.” “Why are you such a terrible person?” “Get help.” Mostly people on social media leaving hate messages that she always ignored. “You have ASPD!” “You’re so self-absorbed!” “I feel terrible for @dipperpines!”

Pacifica wasn’t _self-absorbed_. She was just looking out for the most important person in her life: herself. Playing this chess game right was an essential part of survival. That’s what she was doing. Surviving.

And you have to be willing to do anything to survive, whether that means pursuing a romantic relationship, marriage, children, or otherwise.

Other people were overrated. Pacifica felt that, if every human was placed in a room, that she would be the most important out of all of them. _Her_ health, _her_ safety, _her_ happiness--it was the most important thing, in her eyes. It had always been about her.

And it always _will_ be about her.

* * *

 

As Mabel was getting ready to leave and head to the chapel early, she was overthinking.

She had no idea if she wanted Dipper to marry Pacifica or not.

She had no doubt she loved Pacifica. They were like sisters, practically inseparable. She _did_ agree to be a bridesmaid because she wanted this marriage to happen, but with Dipper’s suppressed romantic feelings about him and Bill’s lingering emotional pain, she was having second thoughts about letting this marriage happen.

Mabel sat down, exhaled, and tried to sort out her thoughts.

Just because Dipper loves Bill _doesn’t_ mean he doesn’t love Pacifica. He could genuinely be in love with both of them, but just have a hard time choosing between the two. He probably feels _conflicted_. Yes, “conflicted” was definitely the right word.

But he was also in severe denial. Most people would accept by now that they have suppressed feelings for their jackass of an ex, but Dipper doesn’t want to. Likely because it’s his wedding and he wants to forget Bill ever even _existed._

Mabel felt bad for Bill’s emotional heartache, but she also felt like it _was_ his fault, even though she knew it wasn’t. He was dumb, plain and simple. A teenage moron who dated someone that was too mature for him at the time. Dipper was miles ahead of Bill when it came to emotional intelligence and maturity.

But...Pacifica was an amazing person. And it was clear that Dipper was in love with her from the way he looked at her, to the way he talks about her to other people. Most people would say he’s over Bill. But Mabel knew he wasn’t.

_Was he faking it?_

Was Dipper faking being in love with Pacifica? Was Dipper trying to _convince_ himself he loved Pacifica? Because if he was, he didn’t love her.

Mabel began wondering why his worries about Bill are coming back to haunt him so suddenly. And now, of all possible times.

She still didn’t know if she wanted Bill and Dipper to get together, or Pacifica and Dipper to get together. It would probably be best for Dipper to end up with Pacifica _after_ getting some closure with Bill.

She glanced at the clock. 8:30 AM. She better get going soon if she were to make it to the church on time. Exiting her bedroom, she turned to Bill--or, William. “Come on, let’s go.”

He had done a stellar job of keeping up the British accent since the early morning, and she was proud. “Alright then.” Before stepping outside of the room, he asks, “Wait.”

She turns to him. “What?”

Bill bit his lip. “Last night, I told Dipper that you were my date.”

Mabel nods. “Yeah, that was in the character notes. So?”

“So...does that mean we have to pretend we’re in love?”

Mabel thought for a moment. “I mean...platonic dates _are_ a thing--”

“I know that,” Bill says, “but last night...I might’ve... _implied_ that you and I were an item. And I’m gay, so this is gonna be hard.”

Mabel snorts. “Dude, you’re a talented actor. Weren’t you part of the improv team in your high school?”

“I told you never to mention that.”

She giggles more. “You’re very quick-witted and charming. You’ll do fine.”

Bill sighs. “So, I’m your fake boyfriend?”

“Yup,” Mabel says. “William talks like a typical British dude. Look over the character notes, and you’ll be foolin’ everyone. Now, let’s get in my car.”

* * *

 

Bill found the British people’s manner of speaking weird, but he wasn’t about to give up now. During the car ride, Mabel and him added to the details of their relationship, covering every question that could possibly be thrown at them.

“Where did we meet for the first time?” Mabel quizzes him.

“We met on Tinder. We first met up at Starbucks.”

“How long have we known each other?”

“Roughly two years.”

“How long have we kept our relationship a secret?”

“The same amount of time we’ve known each other.”

“What’s your favorite thing about me?”

“Your energy and hyperactivity.”

“Why do you love my eyes?”

“Because they’re the windows into your beautiful, beautiful soul.”

Mabel smiled. “Great job, William.”

Bill rolled his eyes, knowing this would be the toughest improv job he’d ever had.

The ride there wasn’t too long--only a few songs away and they were there, though it may have helped that he zoned out a little as Mabel drove. After all, he wasn’t quite sure if they’d be able to pull this whole dates-to-the-wedding thing off. He was snapped out of his thoughts as the car abruptly stops.

“Alrighty, we’re here!” Mabel announces, looking over to Bill in the passenger seat. In a softer, albeit serious tone, she asked, “Any last words before we go in?”

Bill can only think of one thing to say. “I hope to God this works,” he mumbles, unbuckling his seatbelt with a click and getting out of the car.

The building before them was as intimidating as it was pretty. Bill tried to fight off the unease and bitterness he felt just _being_ here. It wasn’t the building itself that made him feel that way, just what he knew would take place here if things didn’t go according to their plan.

Thinking about that made him really wish they could just _crash_ the wedding instead. How hard could that be? He only decided against it because he didn’t want Dipper to hate him even more. Not only that, but it would just be delaying the inevitable. Crashing a wedding wouldn't do anything to actually  _stop_  their love.

Mabel walked over to him, noticing the resentful look the other wore just staring at the building. She knew he had every right to be upset, but now wasn’t the time for it. Pulling up her best smile, she nudged his side, grinning at his offended look. “Ready to go in?” she asked innocently as if she hadn’t just practically stabbed Bill with her elbow.

Bill--or, William--rolled his eyes and gave her a small, somewhat forced smile. “Ready as I’ll ever be," he replied, sticking his arm out to her. Mabel wasted no time hooking her arm in his. They both walked into the building with arms interlocked and worries pushed aside for now, albeit still present.

The interior of the chapel was beautiful and heavily decorated. Though preparations were still ongoing, it looked almost perfect, from the flower decorations, to the wedding arch. Mabel had only been to a handful of weddings before, but this one took her breath away. “Being rich sure has its perks, huh?” Bill muttered under his breath. He had to admit the place looked nice, though not nice enough to completely _captivate_ him like it had for Mabel.

“Definitely," she breathed, trying to contain her awe. When she got married someday, she wanted her wedding to look something like this. Pacifica had great taste. Maybe she could get her input on it if she ever were to in the future. Possibly change the flowers to red roses instead? Or pink? Pink sounded nice.

Mabel was so wrapped up in her thoughts and admiring the beautiful decorations she hardly noticed the vaguely familiar voice calling out to her. “Mabel!”

She whipped her head around to find the source and was surprised to see just who was behind it. “Wendy?” Her eyes lit up with recognition as she spotted the familiar red headed woman over by the tables. Wendy grinned at them and waved them over. Mabel hurriedly tugged her date along with her to greet her friend, unlatching her arm from Bill. Once they were close enough, she pulled the older woman into a hug. “Hey, Wendy! It’s great to see you!”

She chuckled a bit in response, returning the hug. “Long time, no see! What have you been up to, Mabel?” Wendy asked, her green eyes looking away from the brunette for a moment to look up at a man she’d never met before. She had a sneaking suspicion this may be Mabel’s partner, but she hadn’t heard anything from Mabel about her seeing or dating someone. She couldn’t help but ask, “Who’s this?”

“Oh!” Mabel pulled away from the hug to stand by Bill, she’d been waiting for someone to ask, _just like we practiced_. “This is my date, his name is B--" She coughs loudly to mask her slip-up. "Sorry, something must've gotten stuck in my throat." Swallowing and hoping Wendy isn't suspicious, she continues. "This is William. William, this is Wendy.”

Bill gave a smile, taking Wendy’s hand and pressing a kiss to the back of it. “Pleasure to make your acquaintance," he said smoothly, his accent still in place. He had to hand it to Mabel. When she was right, she was right; Wendy didn’t notice a thing.

Instead, she gave Mabel a knowing glance. “Wow, this one is charming. Where did you find him?"

Mabel pretends to flush in embarrassment. "Tinder,” she explained simply.

Wendy gave a small laugh. “ _Really?_ I only ever found creeps on that website," she says, trying to laugh away her severe concern picking at the back of her mind. Nevertheless, the worry was still etched plain on her face. 

Mabel looked at her, concerned. “Are you okay?” As she took a better look at Wendy, she couldn’t help but notice how _stressed_ the woman looked. Her eyebrows were knitted in worry and she seemed to be debating something internally.

Eventually she spoke up, “Mabel...can I talk to you about something?” She looked up at William and back at her. “ _Alone_?”

Mabel paused for a second. Wendy was never this serious. “Yeah, of course.” She glanced at Bill. “Can you wait out here for me?” She didn’t have to wait long for his nod and let them be. Wendy seemed more relaxed once "William" left.

“Okay,” Wendy sighed, “Something... _happened_ when we were setting up here.”

“What happened?” Mabel asked.

Wendy gently hushes her. “Keep your voice down.”

“Sorry," Mabel apologizes, voice quieter this time. “What happened?”

Wendy let out a deep breath and looked down. This was difficult to say. She wasn’t even sure if it could be true, but she had to tell _someone_. It was eating her alive just knowing that there could be a possibility that what that photo contained could be true. She couldn’t confront the bride yet; she wouldn’t be here until later, and there would be absolutely  _no_ way she could tell this information to Dipper.

She didn’t want to break his heart like that.

But she couldn’t just stay silent either. What kind of a friend would she be if she did?

“W--we think Pacifica might be cheating on Dipper.”


	10. 9:00 AM - She Isn't Faithful

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey we're back! sorry for missing a day...incognitoburritoo fell asleep :/
> 
> so we know this fanfic is a bit of a slow burn...and we're sorry about that  
> believe us, we really want to get to the _good_ shit, but we did say this would last 24 hours, so there is still time that needs to be filled  
> we feel like, starting with this chapter or the next one, things will begin to pick up and get more exciting, so buckle up! expect a lot more cussing and backstory. ((and panic! references.))

#  **9:00 AM - She Isn’t Faithful**

At first, her words didn’t register.

When they did, she froze.

Mabel didn’t know if she was supposed to feel like this was a good thing or not. On one hand, this would give Dipper a good reason to turn back to Bill--which would definitely make him happier. On the other, this would absolutely shatter Dipper into pieces, knowing that the woman he’s madly in love with was only _using_ him. “ _What?_ ”

“We don’t know for _sure_ ,” Wendy says. “But there was this Instagram post of Pacifica in bed with another man that none of us recognized. It was posted a few hours ago, but then it was deleted. It _looks_ like it was taken recently, but it’s very hard to tell.”

“Do you have a screenshot?”

Wendy slaps her forehead in frustration. “Oh, _fuck!_ Why the hell didn’t I--” Groaning frustratedly, she runs a hand across her face. “No, we don’t.”

Mabel bites her tongue. “Okay, so what are you going to do about it?”

“We want to talk to Pacifica alone and see what’s up. Because there was no way that wasn’t her. She was _tagged_ in it.”

Her heart skipped a beat. “D--did Dipper--”

“Not that we know of,” Wendy answers before Mabel can finish her question. “We don’t want him to know yet. No reason to ruin his wedding day if she’s not _really_ cheating. So, when he shows up,” Wendy puts her hands on the brunette’s shoulders and leans closer, “ _Do NOT tell Dipper about this_.”

Startled by her intensity, Mabel nods. “Okay. I won’t.” She mimed taking a key out of her pocket and locking her mouth shut, then throwing the key away.

Wendy sighs. “Okay.” As she turns around and starts walking away, Mabel opens her mouth. A sound comes out, but it isn’t a word.

“What was that?”

“Uhh…” Mabel didn’t know if she should tell her about Bill’s unexpressed feelings. She knew it probably wasn’t _necessary_. Did she really have a reason to?

No. She didn’t. “Uh, it’s nothing.” Besides, Bill would probably murder her before the wedding even begun. She would never get to see her brother say “I do.”

Wendy narrows her eyebrows, analyzing her as if she’s lying. “Are you sure?”

Mabel nods a bit too enthusiastically. “Yup. Everything’s good.”

Wendy nods. “Okay.”

* * *

“Mabel, can I talk to you about something? _Alone?_ ”

Bill was horribly uncomfortable with all of this makeup on his face. He was able to stop thinking about it for a while, but now that he was in character, it was all that he could think about. He wanted to scratch his face _so_ badly but he couldn’t, otherwise it would fuck up the makeup.

“Yeah, of course. Can you wait out here for me?”

“Okay,” he says, and they move to a remote corner of the chapel. Bill takes out his phone and scrolls through his Twitter feed to pass the time.

A short woman Bill vaguely recognizes with black-and-scarlet hair approaches him. “Hey, who the fuck hell are you?”

Bill blinks. She was probably one of Wendy’s old friends. He never spent much time around them, but he did know them well enough to recognize them. Reminding himself of his character, he clears his throat. “I’m William. Mabel’s date.”

The woman nods. “Ah, okay.” Her eyes travel around the room once before she casually says the last thing he would have expected. “So, did you hear the groomsbride is a whore?”

Bill’s mind went blank. She _did not_ just say what he thinks she just said. “Sorry, come again?”

“Yeah, she’s a ho.”

Bill felt terrible for feeling a twinge of happiness at this information, he tried to squish it as fast as it came. “Care to elaborate?”

“So basically this rando dude on Instagram posted this photo of him in bed with Pacifica a few hours ago and then he deleted it. She was tagged in it. I think she told him to get rid of it. I screenshotted it,” she says as she pulls her phone out from her pocket. Surely enough, there was Pacifica. Her chest was covered with blankets, and her hair was messy. She looked like she had just finished fucking.

Bill’s heart stopped. His mind shuts down and he freezes.

_Is Pacifica really a whore?_

No. No, there’s no possible way. “That photo’s probably old,” he blurts.

The woman looks at her phone screen again. “Looks pretty recent to me.”

Bill felt himself begin to hyperventilate. _Get your shit together, Bill_ , he thought to himself. He opens his mouth to say something, but no sound came out.

He was simply in shock.

“Wendy’s refusing to believe it’s true,” she says. “You can believe what you want. But I’m tellin’ the truth. Paz is a hoe.” She walks off without another word, leaving Bill alone in silence.

_Was Pacifica really a hoe?_ If she was, it would increase the chances of him getting back together with Dipper by a million, but it would also crush him. It would also mean Dipper’s making the biggest mistake of his life, and in a few hours, that mistake would be practically irreversible. Not to mention the emotional scars would be even more permanent.

But...there was _no_ way that she was really cheating. It simply wasn’t possible. She was too high-profile, too rich, too famous to risk her reputation like that. She certainly wasn’t stupid. If word got out that she was cheating, her life would be ruined. That photo was definitely old.

Besides, Dipper was better off without him anyway.

Mabel approached him again. “Hey.”

“Hey,” he mutters in his normal voice. “Did Wendy tell you what I think she told you?”

Mabel raises an eyebrow. “Let’s say it at the same time.”

“Okay,” Bill says. “One, two, three.”

In unison, they say, “Pacifica’s cheating on Dipper!”

Mabel groans. “How did _you_ hear about it?” she asks in a panicked, hushed voice.

“Some woman with red-ish hair came up to me and started cussing her out,” Bill says. “Looked familiar, but couldn’t place her name.”

Mabel thinks for a moment. “Tambry? She was Wendy’s best friend in high school.”

The name was familiar. “Yeah, Tambry. She was talking so much shit about Pacifica and she showed me a screenshot of that deleted Instagram post--”

“She screenshotted the post?!” Mabel asks a bit too loudly.

Bill covers her mouth. “Yes,” he whispers. “She did.”

“I’m gonna go talk to her.” Mabel practically books across the chapel to reach Tambry.

“Hey,” she says once she’s caught up to her.

Tambry stares at her for a moment, trying to place her name and face. “Mabel, right?”

“Yeah, I’m Dipper’s sister.”

“Ah, figured. You two still look alike, sort of. Anyway, what do you want?”

“Okay-” She took a deep breath before speaking in a hushed tone, “William told me that you told him that Pacifica might be cheating on Dipper and you have a screenshot to prove it?”

“I do, yeah. I'm guessing you wanna see?” Tambry pulls her her phone up. "Here.” She passes her phone to the brunette. Mabel takes the phone quickly. She looks at the screen and all the hairs on her neck rise instantly.

The timestamp shown on the screenshot was from 4 am. From what she could see, Pacifica’s hair was disheveled. Her body was barely covered and bruises from what could only be hickies littered her neck and shoulder. The tags on the picture didn’t make it any better, she didn’t want to believe this--Pacifica wouldn’t _do_ this. Not again.

_Right_?

She couldn’t be cheating on Dipper, this _had_ to be an old photo. It had to be!

If it wasn’t then.. Dipper would be absolutely  _devastated_.

“That...has to be old. Pacifica would never...”

“It was uploaded today, Mabel. A few hours ago, I know none of you wanna believe it, but it’s right there.”

“But she- she _couldn’t_ have done that! She’s not a...” She couldn’t bring herself to say that, it was too mean. She didn’t even know if it was true.

Tambry scoffed. “A slut? A whore?”

“Don’t say that!”

Tambry shrugged, “I’m just calling it like it is," she huffed. "Why else would that photo be posted today? On her wedding day? After a two-day trip?”

Mabel couldn’t respond to that, she didn’t know how to. Tambry, on the other hand, seemed to take her silence as enough of an answer. She sighed. “Look, just like I told your boyfriend, you can believe what you want but we’re all going to find out the truth sooner or later when Wendy confronts her or whatever," she mumbled as she took her phone back. She was fed up with people not believing her. She started to walk away but stopped for a second to look over her shoulder at the frozen brunette. “If you really cared about your brother, you’d do something about it.”

Tambry left without another word, leaving Mabel overwhelmed and hurt. She _did_ care about Dipper, she cared about him more than anyone. She just wasn’t sure if he would believe that. She didn’t want to hurt him with a rumor; that’s not how she wanted this night to end. Clenching her fists, she walked back to Bill.

He was rather easy to find. She could spot the tall man getting a drink. If this were any other situation, she would have thought it was too early to be drinking, but after that revelation, she could use a drink too.

“Hey," she greeted as she walked up.

Bill noticed her immediately. “Oh, hey,” he grinned, pouring another glass of wine and gently handing it to her. “You look like hell.”

“I _feel_ like hell," she said truthfully, mumbling a ‘thanks’ as she accepted the drink and took a sip. Moderating herself a bit, they still had to be somewhat sober after all. Even if she wanted nothing more than to down the glass in one shot.

“So, besides hell, how do you feel about that...y'know.”

Mabel groaned, “I don’t _know._ Maybe it's just an old photo this guy happened to post today?” That wouldn’t be too far-fetched, but with Pacifica’s trip just _days_ before the wedding, she wasn’t so sure about that.

Bill hummed in response, taking another sip of his drink. He enjoyed the pleasant faint buzz it gave him. “Maybe.” He looked down at the drink in his hand, sloshing the liquid around a bit. “Is it bad that I kind of want it to be true?”

Mabel shot him a glance. “I’m—I’m just saying, maybe..” He shook his head gently, “Sorry, I’m just being selfish. Not taking the marriage thing well either.”

Mabel rolled her eyes, punching his shoulder only hard enough to sting. Bill was about to complain when she cut him off. “If I wasn’t helping you, I’d do worse. Trust me.” She huffed at him before looking away. “I mean, I still can’t believe it.” From what Dipper told her Pacifica was nice. She was loyal and loving, the most wonderful person he had ever met, he only had eyes for her and she in return only had eyes for him.

With the screenshot in mind, that seemed to be proved false on both ends.

“I think we should look into it more.” Mabel stares blankly at the wall, visibly thinking.

Bill looked over at her with interest. "What do you have in mind?”

Mabel bit her lip. “We need to find more evidence of this. Wendy’s going to confront Pacifica about it when she gets here. Maybe while she’s busy we can check her phone?” she suggested. If Pacifica really was cheating on Dipper, there had to be some incriminating text messages on that thing.

Bill took a longer sip of his wine, contemplating it. On one hand.. That wasn’t the best plan. They could turn up empty-handed, but on the other, they could possibly help Dipper dodge a bullet. And getting the wedding cancelled, he was all for that. “Sounds as good a plan as any," he eventually said. Mabel smiled.

“Good, because it’s the only one I can think of right now.” Mabel laughed a bit, raising her glass a bit to Bill’s. “To bad plans?”

Bill smiled down at the brunette, meeting her glass with a klink. “To bad plans.”


	11. 10:00 AM - Operation "The Groomsbride Is A Whore"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BUCKLE THE FUCK UP BECAUSE SHIT'S GETTING REAL!  
> Enjoy the ride, readers. Merry Christmas.
> 
> ((To give you a sense of how much important shit goes down in this chapter...it's 2.8k words long.))

#  **10:00 AM - Operation “The Groomsbride Is A Whore”**

“You want to do _what_?” Wendy exclaims as she looks at Bill, Mabel, Robbie, Soos and Tambry skeptically and in disbelief.

After Mabel and Bill formed a plan with their drinks, they filled in Tambry on their plan. She loved it and got Robbie in on it, and Robbie got Soos on board (which was easier than he had anticipated). Their last step would be convincing Wendy to join them.

“We want to steal Pacifica’s phone while you’re talking to her so we can prove she’s a ho,” Tambry says casually. “What don’t you get about it?”

She sighs. “I feel like it’s an invasion of her privacy.”

“It’s for the greater good,” Bill argues, his British alter ego currently present.

“What if she’s _not_ cheating, though? What if that photo really _is_ old?”

“There’s only one way to find out,” Soos says. “I don’t get why you’re so against this. If she isn’t cheating, no harm done. And if she _is_ , we’re avoiding a ton of harm to come in the future.”

Wendy bites her lip, staring at the five others, trying to decide what to do. A long moment of silence passes before she says, “Fine.”

The five others smile, rejoicing in their success of convincing Wendy. “Great! Pacifica should be getting here soon,” Mabel says. “Start a conversation with her while we figure out a way to get her phone from her.”

Wendy nods. “Okay.” She runs a hand across her face, sighing. “This is all just so stressful.”

“I understand that,” Bill-as-William says. “I’ve never been involved in a potential wedding crash before.”

“None of us have,” Mabel says. “We’re just going to have to see what happens.”

Mabel, Soos, Bill, Tambry and Robbie huddle closely together, pressing their ears to the door leading to the room Wendy and Pacifica are in. Inside, the woman and the bride are chatting.

Wendy only paid a little bit of attention to Pacifica, _hearing_ her words but not _listening_ to them. Her mind was racing, trying to find a way to grab her phone. The others were outside waiting for her.

She knew her phone was on the table across the room. She had put it there so she could change out of her clothes and into her wedding dress. There had to be a way to get Pacifica out of the room so she could steal the phone without her seeing.

An idea came to her, and she decided it wouldn’t hurt to try. Wendy moved closer to the door, trying to look casual. She leans against the door and raises her voice a little bit so the others can hear. “Uh, Pacifica,” she says, “I think Mabel just got here, why don’t you go say hi?”

On the other side of the door, the others take that as a sign to scram. Robbie, Soos and Tambry hide in the bathroom down the hall, and Mabel and Bill run off to the room that the wedding would soon take place. Trying to act natural and as if they had been standing there the whole time, Bill-as-William puts his arm around Mabel, and she leans into him.

As Pacifica leaves the room, Wendy takes her phone from the table and slips it in her pocket. Wendy looks into the hallway, trying to find where the other three hid.

Tambry pokes her head out into the hallway and makes eye contact with Wendy. Wordlessly, she takes the phone out of her pocket and tosses it to Tambry. However, Tambry is caught off guard and doesn’t see it coming. The phone hits the wall and ricochets off of it, landing on the floor and making very loud noises. Both women cringe, and Tambry takes the phone off the floor and goes back into the bathroom. Wendy closes the door and goes back into the room, exhaling to calm herself down and hoping that Pacifica didn’t hear it.

Meanwhile, Pacifica, Bill-as-William and Mabel hear the noise. “What was that?” Pacifica asks.

“Not sure,” Mabel says, trying to keep her cool. She was sure that it was the phone, and she was hoping that Pacifica wouldn’t see it.

Bill looks down the hallway and sees that no one is there. “Must’ve been the pipes or something,” he says.

Pacifica dismisses it with a simple “Yeah, I guess,” much to the fake couple’s content. “So, how are you guys doing?”

Tambry, Soos and Robbie take the phone and inspect it. “It’s not broken, is it?” Robbie whispers. “That was pretty loud.”

“It doesn’t look like it,” Soos says. “The screen isn’t cracked or anything. I think we’re good.”

“Will it turn on?” Tambry asks, taking the black device and holding down the button on the side until the phone company logo flashes on the screen. All three breathe a sigh of relief as it does.

Shortly after, the lockscreen appears. A plethora of notifications and unread messages are listed on it. However, the only information shown is the app and the words “Content locked,” which was very suspicious. Tambry swipes down to see the full list of unread messages.

**Snapchat (20) Content locked**

**Kik (12) Content locked**

**WhatsApp (57) Content locked**

**Instagarm (38) Content locked**

The list of apps went on and on. It could simply because she was very high-profile or had many people to talk to, but _Kik?_ That app was notorious for its users with malicious intentions.

She swiped right and was greeted by a message that says “Please input 4-digit pin” and a ten-digit pad to input the password.

Robbie cussed under his breath. “What the hell is her password?” He takes the device and inputs the most common passwords: 0000, 5555, 1234 and 1111. None of them work.

“Maybe it’s her birth year,” Soos says as he takes the phone and inputs the digits “1996.” It doesn’t work.

“Maybe her birthday?” Tambry says.

“When’s her birthday?”

“You can just Google it,” Robbie says, taking his own phone out and opening Google. He types in **pacifica northwest birthday** . The autocomplete list shows in big text **June 18, 1996**.

Robbie snickers. “She’s a Gemini.”

Soos makes a disgusted face. “Come on, man. Not all Geminis are bad people.”

“Debatable,” Tambry says as she takes Pacifica’s phone and inputs **0618** in the phone. To her shock, the home screen opens. “Holy shit, it worked.” The other two whisper “yes” and high-five.

Tambry swipes down from the top of the screen to open the notification shade and scrolls through the seemingly endless list of new notifications. She taps the dropdown menu on the notification that says **Snapchat (20)** with a red Snap ghost next to it. It expands and shows the names of the people from who she received the messages. Out of all twenty people, they only recognize three or four names.

Tambry’s jaw drops. “Guys…” She looks at the two men standing next to her. “We’ve got a hoe on our hands.”

After spending a solid five minutes looking through the messages (but not opening them), they were in complete shock. Tambry holds down the Home and Power buttons to screenshot the notification shade, then opens the Messages app and presses “New Message.”

None of the three conspirators were prepared for what they were about to see.

On the **New Message** screen, they were able to access a mountain of contacts saved on her phone. Since the **W** ’s were at the very end of the seemingly infinite list, they took their time scrolling through. Almost none of these names seemed familiar, but the emojis used in their contact names was confirmation enough of why they were in her phone. When she finally reached the **W** section, she taps **Wendy Corduroy** and sends the many screenshots she took to her, including the screencaps of the long contact list. She also takes the time to send a text to her:

**This is tambry. Told u she was a whore.**

Wendy, who was still in the dressing room, pacing, felt a buzzing in her pocket. Her lockscreen says **23 New Messages from Pacifica** . She felt a sinking feeling in her chest, knowing those messages are actually from her three conspirators. There was _no_ possible way--

_Oh, fuck._

This entire wedding was going to fall apart.

Wendy swiped through the images Tambry had sent her from Pacifica’s phone. She felt herself become _angry_ . It was almost a nostalgic feeling, the same rush of adrenaline fueled by revenge and payback. She _knew_ she had to do something. This wasn’t just speculation anymore, it was _confirmation_.

Pacifica Northwest was a whore.

She taps the **CALL** button next to her name on the screen and holds the phone up to her ear. Tambry picks up. “Yeah?”

Wendy breathes. “We’re going to crash this fucking wedding.”

She can almost _hear_ Tambry smile, the excitement of adolescence rushing back. “What are we gonna do?”

“Get Mabel and William first,” she says. “We’re not gonna deadass call her out yet. We’re going to make this _fucking_ painful for her.”

Tambry chuckles. “ _There’s_ the Wendy I know.”

Meanwhile, Pacifica continues chatting with Mabel and Bill-as-William. “I better go get ready now,” she says, heading off to the dressing room again. “It was so nice to meet you, William.”

“Likewise.”

Pacifica disappears into the hallway, leaving the fake couple alone.

Mabel exhales sharply. “Do you think that noise was her phone?”

“No idea,” Bill says, smoothing out his shirt and reverting back to his normal American accent. “Maybe? It could’ve been a lot of different things.”

“Did you see where they went?”

“They went into the bathroom,” Bill whispers. “Come on.”

They tip-toe down the hallway and knock softly on the bathroom door. Tambry opens it. “Guys,” she says. “We’ve got some tea.”

Mabel and Bill enter the room. “What i--” Mabel doesn’t get to finish her sentence before she looks at the phone in Tambry’s hand. “How did you--”

“Tea now, questions later,” she says as she hands the phone to Mabel. Swiping down on the notifications, she says, “ _Look_ at all of these messages. Recognize any names?”

Heart sinking in her chest and disbelief coursing through the both of them, she takes the device in her hand and scrolls. Only two names are familiar. “Holy shit.”

“And her contact list is even worse,” Robbie says.

Bill-as-William takes the phone and swiftly opens the Contacts app, unprepared for the nightmare that was staring back at him. The scroll bar was so tiny it was almost difficult to use it to scroll, so he opted to use his thumb. It took a good two minutes to get to the bottom of the list. In small, grey text at the end of the list, it says **685 saved contacts**. “Motherfucker.” He hands the phone back to Mabel, absolutely disgusted and angry.

No, angry was an understatement.

He was absolutely furious, but he had to try his best to not let it show.

Mabel runs a hand across her face. _This wasn’t happening. This wasn’t happening. She’s done it again. She cheated on Dipper a second time_.

The moment Mabel and Dipper found out Pacifica wasn’t faithful all those years ago was one of the most heartbreaking things ever to happen to her brother.

_Dipper held the phone up to his ear, listening to the phone ring until the call was answered. The person on the other line was his old friend Joshua. They had recently reconnected and promised each other they would hang out soon._

_“Hey Dipper, what’s up?”_

_“Hey Joshua, are you free right now? I was thinking we could go to the movies or something?”_

_Joshua sighs. “Sorry, I can’t. I’m spending time with my girlfriend Pacifica.”_

_His heart stopped. “Say that again, please?”_

_“That again, please.”_

_“No, I meant literally.” His jokes provide momentary relief from the sudden stress._

_“I’m spending time with my girlfriend Pacifica.”_

_“Pacifica who?”_

_He pauses. “Why do you ask?”_

_“Because_ my _girlfriend is named Pacifica Northwest.”_

_Joshua went silent for the longest moment until he passed the phone to her. “Pacifica, I have a friend that would like to talk to you.”_

Needless to say, Dipper and Mabel gave her hell afterwards. A few months later, Dipper forgave her and they resumed their relationship. But _this_ ...going from having a second relationship to _sexting hundreds of strangers on the Internet_? This was absolutely unforgivable.

Meanwhile, in the dressing room, Wendy continued her conversation with Pacifica. Things were going well until Pacifica began looking around the room, as if she lost something.

Paranoid, Wendy asked, “What is it? Something wrong?”

“Where’s my phone?” Pacifica searched the room with her eyes, the small black device nowhere to be seen.

“Uhh, I don’t know,” Wendy lies, pretending to look around for it. “Here, I’ll call you and maybe that’ll make it ring?” Before she hits the **CALL** button, Wendy shoots an incredibly fast message to Pacifica’s number:

**[10:42 AM] SHE’S LOOKING FOR HER PHONE**

“Good idea,” Pacifica says as Wendy calls the number and holds the device up to her ear.

In the bathroom, the five panic, not sure of what to do. The phone began buzzing in her hands, not emitting sound. “Should I pick it up?” Tambry whisper-yells.

“I got this,” Soos says as he takes the phone and answers the call, putting a finger to his lips so as to tell everyone to be silent. “Hey, Wendy. I guess Pacifica lost her phone?”

Wendy’s heart sat in her throat. “Yeah, she did. Who is this?”

“It’s Soos,” he says as he quietly opens the bathroom door and tiptoes outside the hallway. “Where are you? I can give it back to her.”

“Yeah, we’re in the dressing room,” she says. “That would be great.”

Soos walks over to the dressing room and knocks on the door while pressing **END CALL** on the screen. “Here you go.”

Wendy opens the door just a little bit and takes the phone from him. “Thanks, Soos.”

“No problem!”

She closes the door and hands the phone back to Pacifica. “Thank you,” Pacifica says. “Calling the phone was a really good idea.”

“Oh, anytime,” she says, completely petrified. She had no idea if they deleted the screenshots off of her phone yet.

As Soos enters the bathroom again, Robbie asks, “Dude, what happened?”

“I gave the phone back to Pacifica,” he says.

The four others groan. “We didn’t delete the screenshots of her notifications yet!”

“I’m sorry, dudes! I couldn’t do anything else!”

Mabel sighs. “What are we going to do now?”

Tambry, deep in thought, speaks up. “Here’s what we’re going to do. We’re going to hope to God that she doesn’t notice the screenshots. If she does, we’re going to say we know nothing about it. We’re not going to say anything about her cheating on him, and we’re not going to say anything to Dipper, either.” She looks Mabel dead in the eye. “You. You’re going to chime in during the objections and cuss her out.”

Mabel looked surprised. “Me?”

“You’re the one who’s closest to him out of all of us, including Wendy,” she says. “It should be you.”

Bill didn’t like this. It should be _him_ that calls her out, not Mabel. And the look on her face told him that she was thinking the same thing.

“Okay,” she says. “We’ll do that.”

“Okay.” Tambry sighs. “But that’s not all.”

Soos looks confused. “It’s not?”

“Before the ceremony, we’re going to trash this place.”

Everyone looks shocked. “What do you mean?”

“The reception,” she says. “We’re going to turn it into a burning hell. Flip tables, throw cake, light shit on fire. _Crash the wedding._ ”

Robbie grinned, a look of nostalgia on his face. “Just like high school?”

“ _Better_ than high school,” she says. “And someone’s gonna have to fill Wendy in on this.”

“I’ll do it,” Soos says.

“Great.” Tambry claps her hands. “So, are we ready to crash this wedding?”

“Hell yes,” Robbie and Soos immediately respond with enthusiasm

“Absolutely,” Mabel says, hooking her arm with Bill-as-William’s again.

Tambry smiles. “Awesome. Soos, go talk to Wendy. Mabel and William, go back out to the chapel. Robbie and I will find someplace to hide.”

“Cool,” Mabel says. Bill couldn’t leave that bathroom sooner.

After they leave, he takes her wrist and pulls her to a remote corner of the chapel. “Mabel…”

“I know. _You_ wanna call her out, don’t you?”

Bill exhales sharply. “You know me so well.”

“Here’s what we’ll do. We’ll follow Tambry’s plan, but when the objections come, _you_ can cuss her out and reveal yourself. No one will see it coming!”

Bill chuckles darkly. “Perfect.”

Mabel and Bill exchange a high-five. Together, with the help of their friends, they were going to make sure Dipper never had to face that slut ever again.


	12. 11:00 AM - Pandemonium! At The Parking Lot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Operation "The Groom's Bride Is A Whore" is executed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUYS! WE DID IT!  
> 4320 WORDS WAS WAY LONGER THAN I HAD ANTICIPATED :D  
> This chapter is twice as long as normal, so strap in! We really hope it lives up to your expectations.

#  **11:00 AM - Pandemonium! At The Parking Lot**

> **_“Oh, well imagine,_ ** ****_  
> _ **_As I’m pacing the pews in a church corridor,_ ** ****_  
> _ **_And I can’t help but to hear_ ** ****_  
> _ **_No, I can’t help but to hear an exchanging of words_ ** ****_  
> _ **_‘What a beautiful wedding! What a beautiful wedding!’ says a bridesmaid to a waiter_ ** ****_  
> _ **_‘And yes, but what a shame, what a shame the poor groom’s bride is a whore!’_ ** ****_  
> _ **_I chimed in with a, ‘Haven’t you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door?’_ ** **_  
> _ ** **_No, it’s much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality”_ ** _  
>  _ _”I Write Sins Not Tragedies,” Panic! At The Disco (A Fever You Can’t Sweat Out)_

* * *

Wendy had to keep from laughing hysterically as Soos explained their plan to trash the wedding. “It’s perfect,” she says through her wheezing. “Absolutely perfect.”

“You’re on board?” he asks.

“Hell yes, I’m on board!” she says excitedly. “When are we gonna shit up the reception?”

“Whenever Pacifica isn’t here to see it,” he says. “Pretty soon, she’s going to be leaving the church for a short period of time, and that’s when we can trash up the place.”

“But won’t she see it eventually, anyway? ‘Cause the walls of that room are entirely glass.”

Soos grins. “We’re going to cover the glass with huge, purple curtains. Nobody will suspect a thing.”

Wendy nods. “Oh, okay.” She looks around the chapel. “Where are the others?”

“William and Mabel are over there,” he says. “And I dunno where Tambry and Robbie went. They said they were going to find a place to hide.”

“Let’s find them. I wanna talk to them.”

* * *

The somewhat long drive to the church didn’t help ease his incredibly hyperactive mind. He was _still_ thinking about Bill and what could’ve been. Who knows, maybe if things had gone differently, he’d be marrying _him_ today and not _her_.

Dipper turned up the volume on the car’s speakers to drown out his stupid, stupid thoughts. He couldn’t _believe_ he has been thinking about an ex-boyfriend on his wedding day. He’s been on his mind for 11 hours now; if you can’t stop thinking about someone for that long, what does that mean?

As his car approaches the church, he parks in the parking lot and texts Mabel.

**[11:03 AM] mabel i’m sry about earlier**

**[11:03 AM] is pacifica here yet?**

She responded quickly.

 **[11:03 AM]** _it’s alright dippy, it’s in the past_

 **[11:03 AM]** _yes she is, i’ll take her somewhere else so you don’t see her in her wedding dress_

 **[11:03 AM]** _she’s gorgeous btw you’re very lucky_

Dipper exhales sharply. He knew he was.

 **[11:03 AM]** _i’ll tell u when it’s safe to come in_

 **[11:04 AM]** **okay**

 **[11:05 AM]** _all clear!_

Dipper stepped out of his car and sent a “thanks, i’m coming in” to her and put his phone back in his pocket.

As he stepped into the church, he was shocked at how well-decorated it was. He was also thankful that Pacifica had requested that absolutely no media show up to the wedding so it was a private ceremony just for them.

Mabel immediately runs up to him and hugs him tightly. “Hey, Dippy bro-bro! You look _awesome!_ ”

“Thanks,” he says. “You look very pretty.”

Mabel smiled, showing her brilliantly white teeth. “Come on, I want you to meet William!” She took his wrist and ran over to Bill who was in disguise. He seemed to freeze for a small second when he laid eyes on him.

“William, this is my brother Dipper! He’s the groom!”

 _Oh God_ , this was the man with the sexy voice he had talked to early this morning. He tried his hardest not to stare at his face or his obviously toned body. Dipper absolutely _loathed_ himself. He was getting married, he was thinking about his ex, and _now_ he was lusting over his sister’s date.

God, he was a hoe.

He tried to keep his facial expression neutral as he shook his hand and introduced himself. “Hi, William. I’m Dipper.”

“Pleasure to meet you, Dipper.” Bill-as-William took his hand and felt it for the first time in forever. It was just as warm as he had remembered, though it was bigger now. He tried not to dwell on the comforting and heartbreaking feeling he got from touching his skin. “Is that a nickname, or…?”

He laughs. “Yes, my real name is Mason, but…” He trails off and decides to just show instead of tell. He pulls the tufts of hair covering his forehead up, revealing his birthmark in the shape of the Big Dipper constellation.

Dear Lord, Bill almost touched it. Instead, he just chuckled. “That’s...very impressive for a birthmark.”

Dipper laughs and hides his birthmark again. “Yeah, I get that a lot.”

Desperate to stop this conversation, Bill-as-William says, “Well, Dipper, I’ll see you during the ceremony. Good luck up there.”

“Thanks,” he sighs. “Think I’ll be needing it.” He walks off, leaving the fake couple behind.

Bill exhales and his intestines unclench. His heart was sore from that conversation. God, how he _missed_ his Pine Tree. He could’ve collapsed into sobs right then and there if he didn’t have a character to play.

Mabel touches his shoulder. “You okay?”

Bill sighs. “Yeah. I’ll be fine.” Patting her hand, he says, “Thanks.”

* * *

Robbie uses a small peephole in the ceiling to observe the room below him. He agreed to hide inside the ceiling, as he was the lightest and lankiest of all the men. He chuckles to himself. _Dipper would’ve been perfect for this job._

He’s waiting for Pacifica to leave via this door so he can alert the rest of the members of _Operation “The Groom’s Bride Is A Whore”_ (Soos came up with the name, and no one could think of a better one) and trash the reception.

His phone buzzes in his pocket, making the ceiling tiles vibrate and making him jump a little. He huffs as he takes the phone out of his pocket and mutters, “Someone better be dead or dying.”

**New Message from Soos:**

_Has pacifica left yet?_

He groaned.

**[11:04 AM] I’LL TELL YOU WHEN SHE’S GONE**

Soos responds,

 **[11:04 AM]** _okay okay calm down_

Robbie sets his phone down next to him, making sure it’s on Silent so it doesn’t scare the hell out of him again.

Noises coming from the back of the room catch his attention. He goes closer to the peephole and watches closely. The room has very tall walls, so it’s a bit difficult to see people’s faces.

A tall woman with blonde hair and a white dress runs across the room, opening the door and leaving the building. Picking up his phone and opening WhatsApp, he sends a voice message to the _Groom’s Bride Is A Whore_ group chat, whispering, “The ho has left the building.”

Within a minute, everyone sees the message. Wendy says:

 **[11:06 AM]** _get out of the ceiling and come help us!_

The ceiling creaks, and a feeling of fear settles in Robbie’s stomach. _Don’t worry_ , he tells himself. _Nothing’s gonna happen._

He uses his hands and feet to turn himself around and crawl back to the ceiling tile with the ladder when the ceiling begins to make more creaking noises. Muttering a curse under his breath, he tries to stabilize himself by putting his arms and feet up so he was in a plank position. His heart stops as the ceiling’s noises become louder and eventually breaks in two, creating a gigantic hole that Robbie falls through.

He yelps as he lands on the ground with an incredibly loud thud. Remarkably, there’s not a scratch on his body, but he _is_ covered in debris.

Tambry and Wendy come running over to the room in a panic. “Dude! Are you okay?!”

Robbie gets on his knees, wiping the debris off of him. “I’m fine,” he says. “I’m okay, but holy _fuck_ , that was scary.”

The two women help him up and take him by his wrists. “Come on, let’s go trash the reception!”

Robbie, Tambry and Wendy couldn’t have run faster to the wedding hall. Wendy stands in front of the doors and kicks them open with her foot effortlessly, walking into the room like a bad-ass; her anger was definitely still present and ready to be taken out. Tambry closes and locks the door swiftly, content that the curtains have already been hanged so no one will be able to see what the six are doing. “Okay,” she says. “Let’s go _wild._ Create chaos.” She walks over to one of the tables and puts her hands on the bottom. Everyone is able to see what she’s about to do.

Tambry grunts as she flips the beautifully decorated table over, shattering the centerpiece and ruining the tablecloth and plates. She smiles devilishly, admiring her handiwork. “It’s easy.”

Wendy laughs, turning to the nearest table and doing the same, adoring the sound of the plates crashing to the floor. She was intoxicated by the rush of adrenaline that came from it, and another wave of nostalgia washed over her. _Why hadn’t she agreed to this sooner?_ Growing up sucked.

Mabel and Bill run over to another table and throw it across the room together. It lands with an ear-shattering crash, Bill’s extra strength adding to the impact. All of the plates practically disintegrate when they hit the ground. The fake couple share a high-five, loving the excitement that came from it. The feeling was like a drug; they wanted _more_ and they wanted it _now_.

“Get on my back!” Bill shouts loudly to Mabel, careful to maintain his façade. “I’ll run around and you break as much stuff as you can with your arms!”

“Awesome idea!” she yells as she jumps on him without warning. He grabs her ankles, making sure she won’t fall off his back. Bill begins booking it at full speed throughout the wedding hall. Mabel shoots her hands out, twisting her body to knock over as many things as she can. Centerpieces and vases holding flowers and water fall to the ground. Tambry and Wendy kick the larger flower vases down, and Soos and Robbie destroy the wedding gifts.

A sudden realization hits Mabel like a brick, and she jumps off of her fake boyfriend’s back. “STOP!” she yells. “NOBODY BREAK ANYTHING!”

Tambry looks at her in confusion. “What the hell? Why are you--”

“ _Dipper._ ” It’s the only word Mabel needs to say to send poisonous feelings of dread down everyone’s spines.

“Ohhh, _fuck_ ,” Bill whispers quietly.

“Isn’t this room soundproof?” Robbie asks.

“A room can only proof so much sound,” Mabel says, not caring that the word order she chose was nonsensical. “I’m gonna go check on him. You guys stay silent.”

After leaving the room, Mabel tiptoes down the halls, searching for any sign of her brother to no avail. She was beginning to get concerned. She decided to whip out a quick text to him:

**Yo bro bro where are u?**

Her thumb hovers over the **SEND** button before she looks up and sees Dipper, almost running into him. “Dipper!” Mabel almost jumps back. “You scared me.”

“Oh, hey,” he breathes. “Sorry, I was just pacing in the pews over there.” He pauses to gesture with his hand in the general direction of where he last was. “Over in the church corridor. Still thinking about...yeah.”

Mabel frowns, though she was internally happy about that. He wouldn’t have to deal with a future with that slut; they were going to make sure of that. “Dipper, do you wanna talk? We can go outside if you want.”

Dipper runs a hand through his neatly combed hair. “Yeah, yeah. Sounds like a good idea.”

As they walk outside the chapel, Mabel sends a text to the group chat notifying them to continue trashing the wedding hall.

 **[10:20 AM]** **keep trashing, dipper and i will be outside i’ll tell you when to stop**

Meanwhile, in the wedding hall, everyone feels a buzzing in their pocket and feel a renewed sense of energy when they read Mabel’s message.

* * *

 

“So, you’re still thinking about Bill.”

Dipper sighed, not wanting to say his name out loud, but deciding there wouldn’t be any harm done if he did. “Yeah. He’s been on my mind for the last ten-plus hours, and I can’t stop it. I feel fucking _terrible_ , Mabel. I really love Pacifica, but it’s like the universe is saying I should be with him!”

Mabel furrows her eyebrows. “What do you mean?”

He bit the inside of his cheek. “This morning, I was watching that one _Everybody Loves Raymond_ episode to try to take my mind off of him. The one where Robert dates the frog lady?”

“The one who ate the fly?”

“Yeah, that one,” Dipper confirms. “I was watching the end of the episode when Robert was saying that most people find their other half, and that he has to wake up and accept that there isn’t another half for himself.”

Mabel nods. “Go on.”

“And he went to the bar, and he tripped the waiter over, and the drinks he was holding landed on Amy, his on-again-off-again girlfriend.”

“Okay, so why did that make you think of Bill?”

He exhales sharply. “Because we watched that episode together one night. And in the following episodes, Amy and Robert get married.”

Mabel stares at the ground. “Oh.”

Dipper sighs. “Yeah. But I don’t _want_ to get back with Bill. He’s an asshole. Who’s to say that if this wedding falls apart for any reason--” Mabel had to keep from laughing. “I talk to him and we start dating again, and he ghosts me again? He never gave me a reason for why he ghosted me, even after seven years. Bill’s an asshole. He _would_ do it again. He just played me. So why do I feel like there are all these signs telling me to be with Bill?”

Mabel knew the true answer, but she couldn’t tell him now. It would ruin so many things too quickly. She offered this answer instead. “Dipper, I think it’s because you haven’t had closure with him yet.”

Dipper tilts his head in confusion. “Care to elaborate?”

“Yeah,” she says. “I mean, you always talk about how he ghosted you. You never got proper closure with him. Your breakup was you kicking him in the nuts and screaming at him to get out. That isn’t exactly the most peaceful ‘I’m leaving you’ in the world.”

“Are you saying I should talk to him?”

“Yes,” she says. “But after the wedding. Not now. I mean, he’s 21 now. Definitely more mature than when he was 16. I can be there with you for moral support, if you want.”

Dipper hyperventilates a little. “Okay. Yeah, maybe that’s a good idea? I mean, I don’t think I’m ready to right now.”

“That’s okay,” Mabel says. “Whenever you’re ready. There’s no pressure. Just know that if you ever need someone to talk to, we’re all here for you.”

He extends his arms. “Awkward sibling hug?”

Mabel flashes a wide smile. “Awkward sibling hug!”

They embrace, then open their eyes wide and robotically say “Pat, pat” while patting each others’ backs. They giggle as they leave the embrace.

“Let’s go back in,” Dipper says. “You’ve really helped me today.”

Mabel puffs her chest in pride. “I know, Dippy. I’m the world’s best therapist.”

* * *

 

“Everyone stop!” Wendy announces loudly in the midst of the chaos the five had been causing. Bill had “gone ham” (as he said) with the destruction and lit the cake on fire, not to mention taking large chunks of it with his hands and stuffing it into his mouth, careful not to mess up the makeup Mabel had used to make his skin appear lighter. “Mabel says that they’re coming back in!”

Using a napkin to wipe off the excess cake, Bill-as-William calms himself down, trying to detach himself from the adrenaline rush that came with trashing a wedding hall. Quietly exiting the room along with the others, Bill searched for Mabel, scanning the hallway with her eyes.

“Bill!” Mabel whispers behind him.

Bill yelps. “God, Mabel, you scared the hell out of me,” he exclaims in a hushed voice. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

“No doctor has ever been able to answer that question,” she responds. “Listen, the other guests are beginning to arrive, and they’re getting here quick, so I think it’s time for you to take your seat. I’m going to go to the dressing room ‘cause I’m a bridesmaid.”

Bill exhales sharply. “Okay.”

Mabel gives him a thumbs-up before turning around, but Bill felt compelled to say something. “Mabel!” he says in his British accent.

She turns around again. “What is it?”

Bill bites his lip. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For everything.” He took a deep breath as he prepared to shower her with all the love in the world, because _dammit_ she deserved it. “For giving me this disguise, for helping me emotionally. For listening to me seven years ago when I poured my heart out to you. Y’know, you had every right to turn your back on me, but you didn’t. So, thanks.”

Mabel flips her hair and winks. “Yeah, I’m a good person.”

Bill laughs at her fake narcissism. “Yeah. You really are. Good luck up there.”

“Good luck to _you_. You’ll need it.”

“Nah, luck is for suckers.” Bill smiles. “Love you like a sister.”

Mabel blinks, slightly surprised. “And I love you like a brother.”

An awkward moment of silence passes before Mabel extends her arms. Bill cringed internally; he knew exactly what she was about to say. “Awkward sibling hug?”

Bill chuckled. “Awkward sibling hug.”

They embrace and pat each other’s backs, saying “pat, pat” and soaking in the comfort of the hug for a few seconds before breaking away and heading opposite ways.

* * *

 

##  **\- 11:45 AM: The Wedding -**

The next few minutes went by in a blur. Hundreds of people showed up and took their seats. Bill-as-William sat down in a pew at the very rear of the room. He wanted to be able to flip off the bride as she walked down the aisle without people seeing.

He checked his phone. **11:45 AM.** Oh, _damn_ , it was time.

Time for Dipper to almost make the worst mistake of his life.

Time for Pacifica to recite her sinful, untrue vows.

Time for Bill to make the most important interruption of his life.

“Here Comes The Bride” begins playing, echoing throughout the church. Bill was disgusted by it, all of this money and effort going into such a beautiful wedding. What a shame the poor groom’s bride is a whore.

Pacifica walks down the aisle with her father Preston Northwest by her side, looking absolutely gorgeous in her white wedding dress and blonde hair braided in the most strikingly amazing way.

But he knew her looks were deceiving.

He didn’t have much time to dwell on _her_ appearance when he saw the groom standing at the altar; _holy motherfucking Christ_ , he looked so handsome up there with his hair carefully combed, not a single strand out of place, and his tuxedo fitting him perfectly. He felt the himself getting hotter, the temperature rising.

The priest opened a Bible and recited the typical shit you say when someone’s about to marry someone else. “Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today…”

Their words faded away into a blur as Bill began running through the plan a million times over. Wait until the objections, then chime in and stop the wedding from happening. While they trashed the wedding hall, Wendy was able to send the screenshots to Bill’s phone, so he had something to show to Dipper when it came time to confront Pacifica at the altar. Pulling out his phone and opening the Gallery, he was content to see the images were still there.

“...to love and protect him, to be with him in good times and bad…”

Bill suddenly got a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach, and he felt like barfing. Like this was all a bad idea and he should just let Pacifica marry him because he’d be better off without him. Bill had no right to steal him away; sure, what she was doing was terribly wrong and she deserves to suffer, but _he_ doesn’t deserve to have Dipper either. He desperately missed his Pine Tree, but he knew he had to let go. Because he loved him.

If only he had a time machine so he could go back in time and do things differently. He didn’t deserve to be with Dipper. Pine Tree deserved so much better.

“If anyone has any reason for why these two should not be wed, speak now or forever hold your peace.”

The words left the priest’s mouth all too fast, and suddenly, he’s missed his chance. The others will be furious with Mabel, but it will actually be _his_ fault. Oh, _no, no, no, Dipper’s making a mistake, he shouldn’t be doing this._

_He can’t do this._

_Bill wouldn’t_ let _him do this._

“You may now kiss the br--”

“ **I THINK THE FUCK NOT!** ”

Bill leaps out of his seat in the pew, standing in the middle of the aisle. The entire room freezes and goes completely silent. Even Mabel is staring at him, wide-eyed. Robbie, Tambry, Wendy and Soos were in shock; their jaws dropped to the ground, their eyes as big as pie plates.

_He did NOT just say that._

Bill slowly stalks down the aisle, giving Pacifica a death glare, ignoring the look of pure mortification and horror on Dipper’s face. “Don’t you dare marry her, Pine Tree,” he announces loudly. The guests gasp. It seems to hit everyone in _waves_ ; most of the people here, the right side of the aisle (the Pines family) knew what happened with Bill. His voice must be familiar to them. Wendy and Tambry cover their mouths and turn around, as if it were a car accident they didn’t want to look at. “That bitch is a whore.”

Dipper basically had the wind knocked out of him with his words. It took him a solid three seconds to process that William was not who he said he was. It all made sense when he remembered William was the long form of a name he had been suppressing all morning.

“ **_BILL_ ** **!** ” Dipper screams in terror. “ **_WHAT THE FUCK IS_ ** **_WRONG_ ** **_WITH YOU?!_ **”

“Pacifica’s cheated on you, Pine Tree,” he says, pulling his phone out and handing it to him as he finally reaches the altar. “She’s been sexting strange men on the Internet, all while keeping it a secret from you.”

The entire church inhales all the air in the room, gasping at the same time.

Dipper’s hands fumbled as he swiped through the screenshots of Pacifica’s phone, looking at the contact list filled with names and lewd emojis that would haunt him forever. “Pacifica,” he whispered, tears stinging at his eyes. He held up Bill’s phone, showing her the screenshots. “Is this true?”

The bride stared blankly at her groom, emotionless. Five seconds after Dipper asks his question, Pacifica opens her mouth but no noise comes out. She looks conflicted, like she’s having an internal debate similar to the one Bill had had a mere minute ago. Eventually, she gives the worst answer possible.

“I’m sorry, Dipper.” The words tasted like vinegar to Dipper’s ears. He knew it was all a lie. Pacifica Northwest was an awful slut that wanted nothing more from him than sex. A million thoughts ran through his head, possibilities of what to say to her, ways to cuss her out.

His mind lands on a very simple response.

“Fuck you.”

The words are like sweet candy to him; it feels weirdly _good_ to say that to her, like it was a release. Another gasp comes from the wedding guests.

With the satisfaction of cussing her out, his emotions begin to snowball into anger. Fury. White, hot _rage_.

Without thinking, Dipper raises his right hand and slaps Pacifica across the face, leaving a bright red mark on her cheek. Bill joins in, pushing her off of the altar and spitting on her like she was garbage. “WHORE!” he yells, satisfied at the shocked etched on her red face.

Mabel stomps over to where she landed and slaps her across the face with the bouquet of flowers she’s holding, then kicks her in the arm and hisses, “Don’t you dare ever _look_ at my brother again.”

A sudden wave of heat rushes through the room, catching everyone’s attention. Mabel is shocked when she turns around and sees that someone (her guess would be Tambry) has lit the decorations on fire, and it was spreading quick.

“ **EVERYONE EVACUATE!** ” Wendy screams, gesturing for everyone to leave through the entrance near the front of the room. The guests scramble to escape, jostling into each other, determined to survive this absolute train wreck of a wedding.

Soos runs into the church with a fire extinguisher and begins putting out the fire as the last of the guests leave the building. When all is said and done, the entire back wall is covered in dark ash of burnt decorations, and nobody knows where Dipper has gone.

“Did you see where Dipper went?!” Mabel yelled over all the pandemonium in the parking lot.

“No!” Bill responds. “I haven’t seen him!”

Mabel cusses loudly, then turns to her other friends. “Guys--”

“We haven’t seen him either,” Tambry says. Robbie and Wendy shake their heads.

One problem was solved today--Dipper was no longer marrying that horrible hoe. But now, they had another one on their hands.

_Where had Dipper gone?_


	13. 12:00 PM - Disaster O'Clock

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i (incognitoburritoo) was busy today so vii (alphadeertree) wrote 95% of this chapter. they're an angel. thank you vii! <3 <3  
> enjoy  
> (we're sorry this was posted at 11:21 pm)

#  **12:00 PM - Disaster O’Clock**

Dipper was the one who started the fire.

He still thought it was amusing that everyone underestimated how fast he could run. By some miracle, after Bill pushed Pacifica and spit on her, he was able to escape the altar without anyone noticing. He grabbed one of the candles and lit the decorations on fire so everyone would leave and the wedding would end. He didn’t want to be there anymore.

Once he lit the decor on fire and slipped out the nearest door, he hopped in his car and began driving without a destination. For fifteen minutes, he drove and drove, unsure of where to go, or who to go to. Eventually, he pulled over on the side of the road and cried, listening to the Top 40 hits on the radio.

Dipper exhaled sharply and wiped away the tears, beginning to drive again, knowing where he wanted to go right now. There was a pond that he and Mabel used to play at as children. He was able to see it from here.

Not much time passed before he parked his car and sat on the bench by the pond, which was now frozen over due to the cold weather. He sighed and curled up into a ball, his knees touching his chin. He needed time alone to process _ what the fuck just happened. _

Mabel introduced him to William, who turned out to be Bill in disguise. Then, he prepared for the wedding. Then, Bill crashed the wedding and cussed his bride out. Then, he found out that Pacifica had been cheating with many other men. Then, Bill and Mabel basically beat her while he set the church on fire. Then he escaped.

So much happens in fifteen minutes.

There were too many shocks, too many surprises in such a short amount of time to handle; it all happened so  _ fast _ . 

He wished none of it had happened at all, but he couldn’t turn back the clock and make things better.  _ Where would he even start? _ Maybe before Bill decided to crash the wedding? He wasn’t even sure  _ why  _ his ex-boyfriend came--and with his  _ sister  _ no less.

That was a whole nother can of worms itself.  _ How long had they been seeing each other? How long had they been together? Why did Bill think Mabel would be able to fill the void he left? Why would Mabel agree to that? _ She was supposed to be his sister. They were supposed to tell each other everything and yet, she left him in the dark.

Dipper’s grip tightened around himself as he let out a shaky breath, a puff of cold air coming out of his mouth due to the freezing temperature. He really should have brought a jacket or something. Running out here in nothing but a tuxedo in winter probably wasn’t the best idea, but he never anticipated the turn this day has taken.

Never in a million years did he think Pacifica would go back to cheating on him--not just with one guy, but many. Never did he think Bill would expose her right then and there in front of everyone. He was thankful to know the truth despite how humiliating it was for him. The wedding crash only added to the smorgasbord of emotions he felt. Now that he knew what she had done, the guilt from earlier melted away, replaced with anger and embarrassment--all these bitter emotions he didn’t think he’d be feeling on his wedding day.

This specific day only added more insult to injury. These things weren’t supposed to happen  _ today _ . He wanted to cry again--not because he was sad, but because he was angry and didn’t know what else to do with himself. He couldn’t look at Mabel, he didn’t want to after she’d left him in the dark for who knows how long by seeing Bill behind his back. He didn’t want to see Bill either; he  _ loathed  _ him and detested the feeling of pleasure he felt knowing Bill came to see him. But in reality, he didn’t.  _ Why would he when he was dating his sister? _

So, he was stuck here, alone. A wedding disaster that couldn’t have been prevented even if he tried. His bride, a fucking whore. His sister, a liar that lied to his face about who William really was. His ex-boyfriend, seeing his sister.

On top of that he was rather cold; not quite freezing yet, but if he stayed here for enough time, he might become hypothermic.

“I hate this,” he mumbled quietly, wiping the tears from his face. He noticed a car pull up as he did so. As it parked, out came a familiar redhead. She looked around for a moment before spotting him, looking incredibly relieved when she did. _Of course, she would be; he left a building he’d set on fire without telling anyone._

“There you are, man! You have no idea how glad I am to see you here,” Wendy said, breathing a sigh of relief as she walked over. “Mabel lost her shit trying to find where you might be when the firefighters didn’t find anyone inside the church. She’s worried sick.”

Dipper grimaced at the thought of that. He _did_ start a fire in a building full of people on impulse, after all. Now that some of the anger he’d felt had now faded, he knew that maybe he should've thought that through. “Oh, yeah. Did...everyone get out?” he asked a bit hesitantly. Wendy gave a half smile to reassure him.

“Everyone got out. We still don’t know who started the fire. I thought Tambry might have done something, but it turns out she didn't."

“I started it.” Dipper blurted out, much to the redhead's shock.

She looked at him in utter disbelief. “I’m sorry, _what?!"_

“I just couldn’t be there anymore,” Dipper explained, in a strained voice. “I was angry and wasn’t thinking straight and I _needed_ to _get out of there_ \--" He sounded more and more like he was about to break into sobs the longer he spoke.

Wendy quickly cut him off, putting a gentle hand on his shoulder. "Whoa, calm down. It's okay."

“Sorry," he quickly apologized, trying to compose himself. He didn’t want to fall apart in front of Wendy, too.

“You’re okay.” She finally took a seat beside him and continued talking. “Maybe that wasn’t the best idea. But no one got hurt, alright? I’m won't tell anyone, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“Okay," he sighed. "I’m really sorry. Today’s just been... _heavy_. Not what I was expecting.”

“Tell me about it,” Wendy mumbled, looking over her shoulder. Today turned out a lot different than what anyone had planned. She didn't blame him for escaping the wedding by almost burning it to the ground. She patted his shoulder. “I'm not kidding; I meant that literally. You really look like you need someone to talk to after this whole thing.”

“I don’t even know where to begin, Wendy.” He looked down at the pond covered in ice. “Pacifica’s been cheating on me this whole time, and I’ve been stupid enough to be blind to that. I wanted to give her a second chance after the first time because I knew she was a good person and I really loved her. Guess that turned out _super_  well, didn't it?" Trying to mask his insecurity and depression with sarcasm, he bit his lip, fighting tears that threatened to fall down his cheeks. “I’m such an idiot.”

“You are  _not_ an idiot,” Wendy said to him. “Pacifica was just a bitch. She took advantage of your kindness and forgiveness and used you. You’re not an idiot for being a good person or searching for the good in everyone. Quite the opposite, actually.” She leaned back against the bench, trying to relax. “Remember, you gave her a second chance because you _loved_ her. _You_ didn’t fuck it up. _She_ did, so don’t blame yourself."

“I know, but it still sucks," he mumbled, kicking one the rocks below his feet. “Not only that, but how Bill exposed her right in front of everyone. It was so embarrasing! Bill wasn’t even supposed to be there!"

“Oh yeah, I don’t think anyone expected _that_.” Or at least she certainly didn’t when she saw _William_ for the first time. She had heard through the grapevine things about their break up that took place many years ago, and it didn’t sound like they ended on a positive note. “How are you taking that?”

“I don’t know," he said. “I mean, I  _hate_ that he did that and decided to just crash the wedding out of nowhere. It’s been seven years. I haven’t even had a full _conversation_  with him since the breakup and now he goes and pulls _this_  shit? _Seriously_?” Bill never talked to him about anything. He never tried to call, never texted him, never even said 'hi' when they ran into each other in public. Who gave him the right to just storm back into his life like that without a single explanation? “I know I should be happy that someone said something before we got married, but he shouldn’t have done that.” He rubbed at his face, “I mean, we’re _adults,_ Wendy. He could have just told me and not make a huge scene about it in front of everyone.” He wished he hadn’t. It was embarrassing to watch your bride be exposed like that, even if she _was_  a ho. 

Wendy took a deep breath, “Well, if you’re going to be mad at him, then you can be mad at me too," she stated, catching Dipper’s attention. “I mean, I didn’t know William was Bill at the time,” she mumbled, wishing she could have seen through him. Maybe then she could have done things a little differently. “But I was part of the plan to crash the wedding.”

“ _ What? _ ” Dipper was understandably shocked. “Why?”

Wendy shifted in her spot uncomfortably. She hated to have to be the one to come clean about this, but she had to. It wasn’t fair to Dipper to just leave him out of the loop like this. And even if he hated her by the end of it, she could deal with that. “At around four in the morning, a picture was uploaded to Instagram. Soos and I and everyone else were getting things ready for the wedding and Soos caught the photo of her looking like she’d just pounded it out."

“Why didn’t you guys just tell me?” Dipper asked, his voice breaking slightly. It was _so_  hard to keep it together. “I could have just confronted her about it.” It wasn’t like he hadn’t done that before.

“You wouldn’t have believed us, Dipper. Hell, _I_ didn’t want to believe it,” Wendy explained. Her heart ached when she heard how emotionally broken he sounded. “When we saw that photo--which, by the way, her spam account was tagged in it--I wanted to just think it was an old photo. Tambry was the one who pointed out how suspicious it was that it’d be posted hours before the wedding. It was taken down before we could do anything.” 

“Screenshots _exist_ , you know," he said, shakily. “You could have just screenshotted it.”

“I forgot, okay? Seeing that just fucked me up a bit.” Dipper shook his head but let her continue. “I didn't want to believe it, and neither did Mabel and Bill. We wanted more proof, so Tambry stole her phone and found the sexts. Everything kind of spiraled out of control from there." She paused for a moment. "I was angry and wasn’t thinking straight. You deserve better, Dipper. I wanted to make this as painful as possible for her, but I didn’t stop to think about how that would affect _you_.” She looked down at the frozen pond before them with a sigh. "That was a pretty shitty thing for me to do. I really am sorry."

Wendy didn’t get a response right away. Silence passed through them, broken only by the soft sigh from the brown-haired man sitting beside her. “Look, I know you tried to help. Not in the most productive way, but you did.” He rubbed at his eyes. Everything felt cold now. “I’m sorry I’m just so _exhausted_ from all this. Honestly, I don’t know if I should say thank you or cry.” 

“You can do both, man. I won’t judge,” Wendy said.

He really wasn’t sure how to feel about all these revelations in one day. On one hand, he was happy that he wouldn’t be marrying someone who was unfaithful, but on the other, they _did_ all just decide to crash his wedding without saying anything to him. He wanted to be upset, but all he could feel was tiredness and a desire to nap.

“Thanks," he breathed shakily. He couldn’t stay mad at her; at least she told him the truth . “We should head back. Mabel’s probably waiting and I need to talk to her.”

“Right." Wendy looked over at him, “Are you feeling any better now?”

“As good as I can be right now," he said, forcing a small smile. “Seriously, it's cold and I’m freezing my ass off.”

Wendy couldn’t help but chuckle at that, despite herself. “Okay, okay. Let’s go.”

With that, they both got off the bench and made it back to their vehicles. If Dipper was being honest with himself, he still didn't want to see Mabel or Bill, but he couldn’t just avoid them.

It was definitely better to face these things head-on instead of hiding away from the world. Hiding out does no one any good; it only leads to pain and suffering that comes back to haunt you.

And Dipper had been haunted enough for a lifetime.


	14. 1:00 PM - Ride

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi again! thanks for sticking with us this long!  
> bill and dip talk to each other for the first time in seven years.

#  **1:00 PM - Ride**

Since Dipper and Wendy came to the pond in their own cars, they couldn’t ride in the same car; they had to drive their own vehicles back to the church--or wherever everyone decided to go during the hour that he’s been gone. Dipper and Wendy agreed to call each other and stay on the line so they could talk to each other while they drove.

Dipper climbed into his car and used Bluetooth to connect his phone to his car, so he could hear Wendy’s voice over the car speakers. The phone rang twice before Wendy answered. “Hey.”

He sighed. “Hey.” He bit his lip as he began to drive, turning the car around and heading the direction opposite to which he came. “Where are we going?”

“Everyone went to Mabel’s house after I told them I’d go get you,” Wendy says.

Dipper thought for a moment. “How did you find me?”

“The map on Snapchat told us where you were.”

Dipper nodded. “I forget that exists a lot of the time. Pretty smart of you, I guess.”

“It was Bill’s idea,” she says.

Dipper says nothing. For some reason, it didn’t surprise him.

A moment of silence passed before Dipper asked a question that had been on his mind ever since Bill chimed in and crashed his wedding. “Hey, can I ask you something?”

“Of course.”

“Are Mabel and Bill...like, are they--”

Wendy laughs. She must know what he’s about to ask. “William was merely a character Bill played while he was in disguise. They’re not actually dating.”

Dipper sighed, but he didn’t want to believe it was out of relief. “Okay. ‘Cause...if my sister was dating my ex--”

“Yeah, that would be seriously fucked up,” Wendy agrees. “Bill wouldn’t do that to you. He cares about you.”

Dipper furrows his eyebrows. “He ghosted me and never told me why. I don’t think he cares anymore.”

She stays silent for a long moment. “Are you still there?”

Wendy inhales sharply and exhales as if she was annoyed. “Dipper.”

“I’m here.”

“Do you hear yourself?”

“What do you mean?”

“Bill more than fuckin’  _ cares _ about you, Dipper, he  _ loves  _ you. He never got over you, and to be honest, I don’t think you did either.”

“Hey, l--”

“I wasn’t finished,” Wendy says, interrupting him. “I mean,  _ look _ . Bill disguised himself as someone else so he could attend your wedding. He crashed your wedding so you didn’t marry a whore. He used a worldwide  _ map on his phone _ to find where you were. And you don’t even know how he  _ talks _ about you when you’re not around.”

Dipper’s heart was skipping beats. “Really?”

“Yeah! I mean, I haven’t been around him as much as Mabel, but I’ve seen him talk about you after you broke up. God, Dipper, you’ve never seen a man that  _ longed _ for someone more. His pupils dilate whenever he sees a  _ photo  _ of you. His face always lit up whenever you got near him. Mabel told me that after you “met William” for the first time, Bill almost cried.

“He cares, Dipper. Trust me, he  _ really, really  _ does.”

Dipper bit the inside of his cheek, trying not to let more tears spill down his face. A single one already slid down his cheek. “Then why did he ghost me?”

Wendy sighed. “Honestly, Dipper, I don’t have an answer for you. But Mabel might.”

The rest of the car ride was spent in a semi-comfortable silence. After what Wendy said, he was feeling a little bit better (dare he say flattered) but the unsolved mystery of Bill’s ghosting still lingered. The pond was very far away from Mabel’s house, so by the time they arrived, it was already 1:30.

Dipper exhales sharply as he takes the keys out of the ignition, unprepared to face Bill, Wendy, Mabel, Tambry, Robbie and Soos. Wendy steps out of her car and walks over to the driver’s side door, knocking on the window. He rolls down the window and she asks, “Are you gonna be okay?”

“Yeah,” he says. “Maybe.”

He steps out of his car and they go over to Mabel’s front door, ringing the doorbell. Mabel answers the door, throwing it open and breathing an extreme sigh of relief at the sight of him. She had changed out of her bridesmaid dress; she was now wearing a casual pink t-shirt and pajama pants. Her makeup was partially wiped off. “Dippy, what the  _ hell?!” _ She threw her arms around him and pulled him close. “I was so worried about you!”

“I heard,” Dipper said, returning the embrace and stepping inside her house.

Mabel runs a thumb across his cheek. “Are you okay? You look like you’ve been crying.”

“I have been,” he says, touching his face, “but I’m better, I guess.” He looks around the living room, not seeing any sign of anyone else. “Where are the others?”

“Downstairs,” she says, taking his and Wendy’s hands and leading them down the stairs.

Tambry, Soos and Robbie were all sat on a sofa in the basement, looking stressed and worried. They perked up at the sound of footsteps, and relieved when they saw Dipper was with her and Wendy. “Hi, guys,” Dipper says.

“Dipper!”

“Where the hell were you?!”

He sighs. “I went back to that pond Mabel and I used to love playing at when we were kids. Apparently, Bill used Snapchat to find where I was.” When he mentioned his name, he suddenly realized he wasn’t here. “Where is he?”

“He’s in the bathroom washing off the hair dye and makeup,” Mabel says. “Such a shame. I spent like, 3 hours on it.”

Dipper’s eyes widened. “ _ What? _ How did you get to the wedding in time?!”

“He came over at 2am. Not long after you called, he texted me because he was all sad you were getting married and you were gonna be permanently off the market.”

Before Dipper could respond, footsteps came from the stairs again; this time, the feet belonged to Bill.

The blond man froze when he saw his ex-boyfriend of seven years standing in the basement. His hair was just as blond as he remembered, and his skin was still a light, milk-chocolate color. The makeup he had been wearing did a really good job of making him look lighter than he actually was. The tips of his nose and his eyes were slightly pink, as if he had been crying, just like Dipper. Above all, he looked exhausted.

But he also looked  _ extremely _ handsome.

Dipper bit his lip and averted his gaze as he uttered the first words he’s (deliberately) said to Bill in seven years. “Hi, Bill.”

Bill gulped nervously as he finished walking down the stairs, standing in front of his Pine Tree. “Hi, Pine Tree.” He wasn’t sure if he was okay with the nickname. “It’s been a while.”

Dipper felt so many emotions at confronting his ex-boyfriend (in front of everyone) for the first time in forever. Anger, confusion, hurt, sadness, lust, longing, happiness. Anger was probably the most powerful out of all of the emotions. Hurt was a close second. “Why did you do that?” He had always been bad at small talk, and with a conversation bearing this amount of significance, he decided it would be best not to waste time.

“Do what? Chime in, crash the wedding?”

Dipper raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms. “Yes.”

“Why wouldn’t I have done that?” Bill says. “Any decent person would’ve stopped that wedding. That bitch is a hoe.”

“It was extremely embarrassing,” he says. “You could’ve just told me in private and I wouldn’t have shown up to the wedding. Be one of those runaway grooms, I guess.”

He thought for a moment. That probably would’ve gone over better. “We wanted to make Pacifica suffer. She has done this twice already.”

“I think her groom ditching her would be terrible enough,” he says. “That’s like, every girl’s worst nightmare.”

“I’m sorry. Wasn’t thinking straight, I guess.” Bill stared at Dipper’s mouth as he said this.

He grinned. “That’s what Wendy said.”

Both men turned around, suddenly aware of everyone else’s presence. They were watching them both intently, like it was an intoxicating movie or something. “Do you want us to leave?” Mabel asks.

“That would probably be best,” Dipper says.

The team of wedding crashers (minus Bill) walk up the stairs wordlessly, closing the door behind them so Dipper and Bill are alone in Mabel’s basement.

Bill sat down on the couch, kicking off his shoes and sitting on his feet. “Do you wanna sit down?”

Dipper slowly sat on the opposite side of the couch, as if he were uncomfortable, despite the fact that he had been at Mabel’s house a million times before. “Sure.”

Both men knew about the elephant in the room, but neither one wanted to bring it up first. As an attempt to get him to say it, Dipper awkwardly coughed. “So...it’s been a while since we’ve talked.”

“Yeah,” he says. “Seems like you’ve been doing well without me.”

“Well, I was, until…” He trailed off, but his words caught Bill’s attention.

“What? Until what?”

Dipper grimaced, not wanting to tell him. “Few weeks ago, I was scrolling down my Twitter feed, and one of your tweets showed up in my timeline. I dunno why it was there, ‘cause I don’t follow you. But it said something about binge-eating Turkey on Thanksgiving and staying home. And I thought about our previous relationship. Made me nostalgic, I guess. Every day, it kept getting worse. It was like the universe was screaming at me to talk to you.”

“What do you mean? What happened?”

Dipper sighed. “This morning...I was up at midnight, and I was thinking about our breakup. I called Mabel for advice on how to relax, and she said--” His breath caught in his throat as he realized what he would have to tell him if he were to continue. It wasn’t exactly easy to get out-- _ ”Hey, Bill, I was masturbating while thinking about having sex with you on my wedding day!” _ He couldn’t simply  _ say _ that. “She...told me to take a hot shower, but it didn’t  _ help _ . Then, I was watching  _ Everybody Loves Raymond _ , that one episode about Robert dating the frog lady--”

“Oh, Season 7 Episode 9, ‘She’s the One’?”

Another wave of nostalgia washed over him as he remembered that Bill had an encyclopedic knowledge of all 90’s sitcoms. “Yeah, that one. And at the end, Robert says that there’s no other half for himself, and then he goes to the bar and sees Amy?”

Bill nods wordlessly.

“I almost threw the remote at the screen, because I thought of you and I,” he says. “Like, I was Robert, the frog lady was Pacifica, and you were Amy. Guess that’s pretty fitting now, with what’s happened.”

Bill continues to nod, still not saying anything. “Is that it?”

“Well, I talked to Mabel for a bit just before the wedding,” Dipper says, deciding there’s no point in hiding this information. “She told me the reason that the thought of you keeps haunting me is because we never got closure.”

“Closure?”

“You never explained why you ghosted me.”

“Oh, that,” he says, looking down at the floor, beginning to feel sick. “It’s a really long story.”


	15. 2:00 PM - Backstory

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey so  
> sorry this was posted so late, we were busy  
> and  
> I have a Twitter now  
> I post updates about my pics  
> twitter.com/incogburritoo  
> and this chapter is only 1.5k words... sorry about that

#  **2:00 PM - Backstory**

Dipper looked up at him in surprise. He really didn’t think that he would be getting any sort of answer from Bill. “Go ahead.”

Bill sighed. "It's...a really long story."

"That's okay," Dipper says, pulling a pillow close to his chest and curling into a ball in the most adorable way possible. "Start at the beginning."

"The beginning was a really long time ago."

"I don't care. It's not like I have anywhere I need to be anymore." Dipper's signature sass was one of the many things Bill desperately missed about him. "Go on, tell the whole story."

Bill bit his tongue. "Are you sure?"

"Why are you stalling so much?"

Bill cringed. "I just don't like telling this to people. And besides, you'll think I'm dumb.”

"I  _ already  _ think you're dumb," Dipper quips. "This won't do much for my opinion of you. Now tell me what the hell is going on, or I'm leaving."

He hated having to tell the story of his stupidly shitty childhood, but he knew that the chance of possibly getting his Pine Tree back began with forever closing the seven-year wounds he had left behind. "My parents abused me."

Dipper almost flinched as the realization that this story would be much darker than anticipated hit him.

Bill continued speaking. "My dad abused my mom and I. She tried to save me, but eventually gave up and saved herself instead of me. Was in a pretty bad place for a while. I found a group of people I trusted, eventually. They even got me my own place to live so I didn't have to live with my parents anymore." Bill pauses for a hot minute, knowing he was about to get into details that not even Mabel knew about.  He glances over at Dipper. His expression is somehow neutral and disbelieving at the same time. "Then I met you and Mabel. And we started dating." He sighed and got a bad feeling he was going to cry. "Do you remember when we were sixteen, we went to this Italian place?"

Dipper furrows his eyebrows. "We went to a lot of Italian places. You'll have to be more specific."

"I think it was Olive Garden, but I'm probably wrong. You were wearing a white collar shirt and black jeans, and I was wearing all black. Your favorite song at the time was 'California Girls' by Katy Perry."

Dipper cringed. "The night you went to the bathroom for a really long time?"

"Yeah, that one. I wasn't actually going to the bathroom, by the way."

"What were you doing?"

"I'll get to that," Bill says. "So, the date was going well. Pretty normal, actually. We were basically sitting there making goo-goo eyes at each other."

Dipper said nothing.

Bill went on. "Anyway, I got a text from one of my friends telling me to go to the men's room, and that's why I was gone for so long. Turns out they were spying on us and saw us kiss. They didn't know I was dating you, and they started callin' me a fag for dating the nerd. On top of that, you were a boy."

Dipper thought for a moment. "Wait, they knew who I was?"

"Yeah, they went to our school, but almost never showed up for class. They were pretty good at putting together names and faces nonetheless."

"What were their names?"

Bill cringed as he recalled their faces, the disgusting creatures that shamed him for his sexuality. "Jason, Tony, Marcus and Ethan."

"There were, like, 20 Ethans at our school."

"He had blond hair and was really, really tall."

Dipper was suddenly able to match the name to the correct face. "Oh!  _ Him _ ?"

“Yeah, him,” he says. “Anyway, I was really ashamed that my friends were calling me out for being gay. And I was afraid they were gonna do something, like abandon me and take away the place they gave me. So I ghosted you.”

The brown-haired boy stared at his ex for the longest moment, not showing any obvious signs of emotion. He looked...confused. Finally, he spoke up, sounding angry. “So the reason you ghosted me and left me scarred for seven years was because your homophobic friends were bullying you? And you were  _ ashamed  _ of that?”

“Basically, yeah.”

Dipper stood up and paced around the room, visibly thinking. He was definitely pissed. “Don’t you  _ think,” _ he vents, “that when homophobes are  _ bullying your boyfriend _ that you should  _ defend _ him instead of _ ghosting  _ him?!”

“I know the answer to that, and every day, I regret choosing the wrong answer,” Bill says, tears stinging at the corners of his eyes. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. “I really  _ am  _ sorry, Pine Tree, I don’t know what else to say!”

Dipper turns around and stares at Bill, looking him dead in the eyes. “You never got over me, did you?”

“Oh, you’re picking up on that now, are you?” he says sarcastically. “Of COURSE I never got over you! Why the hell do you think I went to your wedding in the first place?!”

“I don’t know! You had no reason to be there! According to Wendy, nobody knew Pacifica was cheating until a few hours before the wedding, so you couldn’t have come just for that!”

Bill becomes expressionless as Dipper asks the inevitable question. “Why did you go to the wedding?”

He bites the inside of his cheek. “I don’t think I can tell you that.”

Dipper rolls his eyes and sighs frustratedly. “Gee, where have I heard _ that _ before?!”

It was almost verbatim what he said to Dipper when he asked why he was ghosting him. He wasn’t able to tell him why. “Why can’t you tell me?”

“I’m protecting someone,” Bill says.

Dipper approaches his ex-boyfriend, stepping closer to him and towering over him, since Bill was still sitting down. “Who?”

Bill cringed, not wanting to get her in trouble and make him angrier. But he did need to know. “It’s your sister,” he mumbled miserably.

Dipper turned and faced the stairs.  _ “Mabel!” _ he yelled.

“What?!” she responded from upstairs.

“Get down here, I wanna talk to you!”

Mabel came downstairs not a minute later, seemingly startled by her brother’s intensity. “What is it, Dipper?”

“Why was Bill at the wedding?”

She glances at him. “What?”

“Why was Bill at the wedding?” he repeats, slower this time. Mabel’s vision shifts to the blond man on the sofa again. “Don’t look at him,” Dipper says, stepping to the side to obstruct her view. “Don’t you look at him, Mabel. I know that you are part of the reason why he was at my wedding in the first place. I want you to tell me why.”

Mabel sighed. “Dippy, _ please _ don’t be mad.”

“Well, I  _ am  _ mad, Mabel,” he says. “Why was he there?”

She cringed, knowing there wasn't a way out of this. “I told Bill that you still have feelings for him--”

Dipper went pale.

“--and he didn't believe me, so I told him I'd wear a wire so we could record you saying that. But then we found out about Pacifica, and that became the least of our concerns.”

Dipper barely heard the last few words. “You told him  _ what _ ?” he asked through clenched teeth.

Bill stands up. “Pine Tree, is it true?”

That was the question he really didn't want to answer right now. He had obviously had thoughts about him over the past few days, but  _ love? _ He was hoping it was simply lust and not romantic longing. “I don't know,” he says. “A lot has happened to me today. I just need some time to  _ think _ about all this.”

“You had time at the pond,” Mabel says.

“Apparently it wasn't enough time.” Dipper turns around and enters the laundry room, locking the door behind him. 

He sat down on the floor and tried to make sense of things.

He knew that Bill still loved him and apparently regretted his decision to abandon him after being bullied by his homophobic  _ friends _ . Mabel invited him to the wedding so she could record him saying that he still loved Bill. And he had been having sinful thoughts of his ex boyfriend. But on top of all of this, his bride was a whore. He chuckled softly.  _ It's like that one song about closing the goddamn door came true. _

He didn't think Pacifica would cheat on him again. She was a good person—he thought—and she could learn from her mistakes. But now he knew that wasn't true. She probably saw him as nothing but a sex toy, an item to carry around for fame and validation. And it hurt like hell.

_ Did he really mean anything to anyone? _ It was an honest question at this point; he wasn't sure if anyone ever truly loved him. Bill could be lying. Hell, even Mabel could've been acting like she was happy to have a brother but actually loathe him this whole time! Were his friends fake, too?

Tears fell down his cheeks. His mind flashed back to the moment Bill and him were watching that Everybody Loves Raymond episode and Bill said, “If I had that bad of luck, I'd just give up.”

Maybe he should take that advice.


	16. 3:00 PM - Jar of Hearts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi again!
> 
> just wanted to thank a few people who have been commenting on our fics regularly:  
> Jaylafer, Toasty_Waffles, AllDressedUpAndNaked, and Ladynoir_is_back.
> 
> Follow me (incognitoburrito) on twitter to get updates about all my fanfics! [link](http://twitter.com/incgntoburrito)
> 
> hope you enjoy!! vii is such an angel, they did 99% of the work and wrote like 3000 words!

#  **3:00 PM - Jar of Hearts**

Pacifica hasn't been able to do much since what happened almost four hours ago.

Everything happened so fast. She thought everything was going well until Dipper's stupid, horny ex-boyfriend crashed the party and spat on her. She knew very well that she could sue for being slapped, shoved, spat on, and then beaten with a bouquet of flowers, but she wasn't going to. Romance was a game, and she had to do whatever she could to still give her a chance at winning. A lawsuit would set her back so far, Dipper would never speak to her again.

Pacifica didn't get up and leave the church when the fire started. She was too tired to move, anyways. She lied there for fifteen minutes, then decided to get up and go into her car, where she hasn't moved since. The radio was keeping her busy with the terrible Top 40 Pop hits she knew Dipper loved so much.

She began paying closer attention to the radio when a familiar song title was read by the DJ and the song began playing.

> _“I know I can't take one more step towards you, 'cause all that's waiting is regret…”_

Pacifica knew this song. It was called _Jar of Hearts_ , and Dipper had tweeted about it seven years ago when he and Bill broke up. The lyrics represented their relationship very well at that time, but now she thought it might represent Dipper and her, not him.

> _“Don't you know I'm not your ghost anymore? You lost the love I love the most…”_

The blonde woman bit her tongue. She didn't know why people found songs that accurately represented their emotions. It just makes emotions worse.

> _“I've learned to live half-alive, and now you want me one more time? And who do you think you are, running around, leaving scars? Collecting your jar of hearts, tearing love apart? You're gonna catch a cold from the ice inside your soul, so don't come back for me. Who do you think you are?”_

'Don't come back for me’ is what Dipper told Bill when they broke up, but he also said that to Pacifica the first time he caught her cheating. If he came back to her once, he could do it twice.

> _“I hear you're asking all around if I am anywhere to be found, but I have grown too strong to ever fall back in your arms!”_

That lyric was sung with more intensity than the previous ones; the singer sounded angry, determined, hurt. She was finding many parallels between this song, Dipper's relationship with Bill, and Dipper's relationship with Pacifica. Dipper thought he was too strong to fall back in Pacifica's arms, but she proved that wrong. Mistakes can be made more than once.

> _"And I've learned to live half-alive, and now you want me one more time?"_

She rolled her eyes. This was one of those songs that kept repeating the lyrics. Songwriters could at least include some word changes in the chorus.

She zoned out as the bridge of the song began. Pacifica could definitely make him fall for her again. He was a rather gullible human being, so it shouldn't be too difficult. Dipper did believe in multiple chances, after all.

The last few notes of _Jar of Hearts_ played and the song ended, thankfully. Her relief didn't last long, though, as a familiar rock song began. She could never remember the title of it, but she (just like anyone who listens to the radio) knew the intro and chorus by heart:

> _"Oh, well imagine, as I'm pacing the pews in a church corridor, and I can't help but to hear, no I can't help but to hear an exchanging of words._   
>  _'What a beautiful wedding! What a beautiful wedding!' says a bridesmaid to a waiter._ _  
>  'And yes, but what a shame, what a shame the poor groom's bride is a …’"_

She cringed. She knew what word the radio had censored out.

> _"I chime in with a, 'Haven't you people ever heard of closing the goddamn door?' No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality!"_

Yeah, it _was_! Why the hell hadn't they handled the situation more discreetly instead of crashing the whole damn wedding?!

Pacifica turned the radio off and decided to start driving in silence. She didn't need the radio to tell her whole life story.

* * *

Dipper sat in the laundry room, idly scrolling through his Twitter feed, confused and heartbroken. He didn't know who to love, or if anyone loved him.

His mind went back to what Wendy told him at the pond.

_“Bill more than fuckin’ cares about you, Dipper, he loves you. He never got over you, and to be honest, I don’t think you did either.”_

He scoffs. If someone really did care about him, they wouldn't have pulled any of this shit.

Suddenly, there was a loud pounding on the laundry room door. "DIPPER!" He heard Tambry's familiar voice. "DIPPER, OPEN THE HELL UP!"

Not wanting to anger her further, Dipper obeyed and opened the door. "Need something?"

She steps in and closes the door. "I wanna talk to you."

He raises an eyebrow. "Who sent you?"

"No one," she tells him. "I came here by choice."

"What do you want?"

"I'm here to talk some sense into you," Tambry says. "You're irritating the fuck out of me."

"What did I do?"

"You're not forgiving Bill."

Dipper rolls his eyes. "So what? Why is it suddenly one of the seven deadly sins to not forgive my ex for ghosting me?!"

“Because Bill is giving you a _reason_ ! And it was _seven years ago!_ Why the hell can’t you forgive him?! You forgave Pacifica when _she_ cheated on you!”

Dipper opens his mouth to say something but quickly freezes when Tambry finishes her sentence. She was right, in a way. _Did he really not have an answer to that question?_ He forgave Pacifica because she had apologized a million times and swore she would never break his heart again; she _tried_ to earn back his forgiveness. As far as he could tell, Bill never even _wanted_ his forgiveness. But now that Bill gave him a reason and said he was sorry, he technically didn’t have a reason not to forgive him.

So why was this so hard?

“He still shouldn’t have—he should have _talked_ to me instead of waiting seven years to—”   
“Bull. Shit,” Tambry cut him off. If looks could kill, she would have slaughtered him right then and there. “You’ve been avoiding the guy ever since. He never had a _chance_ to redeem himself or say sorry because you never gave him one! He was trying to be respectful to _your_ dumb ass, and now that he has, you won’t hear him out?! Pacifica might have been there to apologize after cheating on you the first time—”

Dipper winced.

“—but that doesn’t mean she meant it, considering she kept doing it. Bill has been waiting _this entire time_ for you to come to your senses and actually _talk_ to him for once for SEVEN YEARS! Would Pacifica do that?” Dipper didn’t know how to respond to that. His jaw clenched. “Didn’t think so.”

Tambry eased up when she saw how pathetic and broken the boy before her looked, and sighed. “Look, for a guy so smart, you can be really dumb sometimes, okay?”

Dipper didn’t argue with her. He wanted to take offense, but found it easier to just accept that. She was right, after all. “But, someone likes that about you,” she said.

That got Dipper’s attention. “What...do you mean?” He asked a bit hesitantly.

Tambry rolled her eyes. “If Bill’s waited _this_ long for you, crashed a wedding to keep you from marrying a whore and told you what he did in the basement—”

“You were listening to that?”

“That’s not the point. Pay attention.” She snapped her fingers. “If he did all that, then he loves you more than Pacifica ever did or could,” she mumbled, “so at least give the guy a chance. It’s not like it's gonna ruin your life more than it already has been.”

Dipper knew she had a point there. Things couldn’t get any worse than they already had. “Why do you guys care so much if I forgive him or not?”

“Because it sucks seeing both of you clearly unhappy and too stupid to fix it,” she huffed. “Someone has to knock some sense into you two morons.” Tambry was more than happy to do it if no one else would. “Take my advice with a grain of salt, or whatever, but I think that if you gave that cheating bitch a chance, then you should give Bill one.”

“What if that just blows up in my face too?” he blurted out. “What if he’s just doing this for some stupid selfish reason?” _What if he’s just going to use me?_ He didn’t want to be hurt anymore, not by the people he loved. He didn’t want to be played for a fool anymore; he’d had enough of that and he didn’t think he could handle that again. Not from Bill, or anyone else.

“We’ll kick his ass for you if that happens,” Tambry said with ease. She didn’t think Bill was capable of something like that. Not with how he went out of his way to get Dipper back and what she’d overheard. “Promise.”

It was a while before Dipper responded. He was still so conflicted. He was scared of being hurt again or used.

But Tambry was right. _Why else would Bill do those things if he didn’t love him_ ? Maybe it _was_ stupid how he decided to do things back then, but they were both just stupid teenagers. He could try to forgive. Try to make things better and fix things on step at a time. “Okay,” He breathed out.

“Okay?” Tambry pressed for more, hand on her hips.

“I’ll...I’ll go talk to Bill,” Dipper sighed, “and I’ll try to forgive him.”

“ _Thank fucking god!_ ” she exclaimed. “You have no idea how relieved I am. I was so ready to punch you if you kept being an idiot.”

“Aaaand I'm reconsidering.” Dipper said, dragging out the _a_.

Tambry narrowed her eyes at him. “Don’t you dare, Pines.”

Dipper couldn’t help but give a bit of a smile. “Kidding.” He still didn’t appreciate being called an idiot, but he really couldn’t bring himself to say anything about it. That was just how Tambry was most of the time. Besides, he had other things on his mind.

The woman rolled her eyes and turned to exit when she shot him a glance. “You coming, or are you gonna stay here and mope for a while longer?”

“Coming,” he said, following after her, going upstairs.

He heard Mabel and Bill talking in the kitchen. He entered, vaguely hearing the tail end of a conversation. “—we really fucked up big time, didn’t we?”

Mabel was stirring something. She was still in her casual clothes that were now slightly stained with what was probably batter. Her eyebrows were knitted as she looked down at the bowl, biting her lip in uncertainty.

Bill was leaning against the counter, his bow tie undone, shirt a bit wrinkled. The top buttons were unbuttoned, as well, and his sleeves were rolled up to his elbow. His tuxedo coat wasn’t anywhere to be seen. Despite how messy he looked, Dipper couldn’t help but think that he looked incredibly handsome. He hated that even with how warm Mabel’s house was, just looking at Bill had him feeling the hottest he’d felt all day.

“I...yeah...we probably should have thought this whole thing out better,” Mabel sighed as she kept stirring. Dipper suddenly remembered that baking was something Mabel resorted to relieve her stress.

“ _It’s something that makes me happy, y’know? It makes other people happy, too, so it's nice to make something good out of bad funky moods_ ,” he could recall her saying. He felt a bit guilty, knowing that he may have caused part of that stress.

They still hadn’t noticed him. He decided he didn’t have anything to lose and cleared his throat. “Hey.”

Mabel’s eyes lit up, “Oh, Dipper! Bill and I were just about to make Christmas cookies since we ran out earlier.” She wanted to ask if he would like to join them, but that seemed too soon. Carefully, she asked, “Did you have time to think?”

Dipper tried to ignore Bill’s stare. He looked so hopeful. “Yeah. I did.”

A small beat of silence passed through them as Mabel tried to push her fear away and ask, “And...?”

Both pairs of eyes were on Dipper, which made him all the more nervous. He wasn’t sure how to go through with this, but he knew he couldn’t back out now. “You both fucked up.”

Their eyes widened and Dipper had to hold back a laugh at how shocked they looked. He turned to Mabel. “You told Bill something I didn’t want you to tell him and made a plan to crash my wedding to help him ‘get me back’ without me knowing.” Mabel shifted uncomfortably at the completely true accusation. She hung her head as she looked down at her bowl of batter.

He turned to Bill. If the man had a tail, it would be between his legs, based off the look he gave him. “You ghosted me without telling me why for seven years.” He stepped closer. Bill pressed himself back against the counter a bit more, but didn’t make a move to run. “You crashed my wedding.” Another step. “You spat on my bride.” He was in front of him now. “And you only told me why you ghosted me now for one of the dumbest reasons I’ve ever heard.” Bill was averting his gaze. He could definitely tell this all hurt him, as it should.

“But I'm forgiving you.”

Bill's vision flickered to his face. “What?”

“I forgive you,” Dipper repeats. “You were a dumb teenager that didn't know the first thing about romance. I can tell you've matured.” He sighs and looks down at his feet. “I'm not saying I want to go out with you again. I don’t know about that yet. But I do want to stop hating you.”

Bill stared at him in disbelief. “Why are you forgiving me?”

Dipper inhaled. “Because I think that it wouldn't be fair of me to hold a grudge against you after you gave me a reason. And I was able to forgive Pacifica for cheating on me the first time.”

Bill looked like he was on the verge of tears. He stared at the floor as he whispered a quiet “thank you.”


	17. 4:00 PM - A Painfully Awkward Lunch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! This update is about 1600 words. We're sorry about the shorter chapters as of recently. We're just trying to stick to our promise.  
> We appreciate everyone that regularly comments on the chapters. We love you so much and always look forward to seeing you pop up in our inboxes.

#  **4:00 PM - A Painfully Awkward Lunch**

Dipper really, really didn’t want to do this.

Mabel practically shoved him and Bill out of the door after he forgave him, excited that they might be able to build up a normal relationship again. Not necessarily a romantic one, but a relationship nonetheless. He sat uncomfortably in the passenger seat of Bill’s car, hands in his lap, trying to fight down the redness that was growing on his cheeks. Even though he was still experiencing extreme emotional pain due to Pacifica’s adultery and was very unsure about his feelings for Bill, the smallest fraction of his mind wanted him to go through with this.

He knew Mabel must’ve wanted them to get back together after he forgave him and pursuing a relationship with Pacifica proved to be pointless. She insisted that wasn’t the goal of this, but he knew deep down that was what she really wanted. He wasn’t sure if that was what  _ he  _ wanted, too.

He saw Mabel whisper something in Bill’s ear just before they left. Curious, he asked him, “Bill, what did Mabel whisper to you just before we left?” Dipper could only imagine the many things she could’ve been saying. Most likely, she was suggesting a place for them to go, but he couldn’t get some of the more fantastical ideas—which he wouldn’t name—off of his mind.

Bill glanced at him briefly, still trying to keep his eyes on the road. “She said I should buy you lunch.” The truth was, Mabel told him to take him to a nice restaurant— _ not  _ one that would make it so painfully obvious that it was supposed to be romantic and sway his overall opinion of him—but one that was  _ way _ more formal than McDonald’s. A comfortable middle ground between formal dining and fast food. Besides, Dipper didn’t even  _ like _ formal restaurants.

Dipper looked at him in confusion. “Lunch? It’s four in the afternoon,” he points out. For most people, lunch would’ve been two or three hours ago, maybe even earlier. 

“Yes, but neither of us have eaten,” Bill counters. “The wedding was ruined. We weren’t getting any food.” He cringed internally as the memory of trashing the wedding hall came rushing back, the intoxicating exhilaration of breaking random shit, shooting your arms out to knock things to the ground, and kicking down flower vases. He didn’t actually see any food in the wedding hall at the time. He knew it must’ve still been in the kitchen, being prepared for the would-be guests. Then, of course, Bill chimed in during the ceremony and stopped everything.

“Fair point,” Dipper says. “Are you taking me to a restaurant?” It had better not be a fancy restaurant because then he would know what Mabel  _ really _ said.

“We’re going to Applebee’s,” he says. It was Mabel’s first idea since it wasn’t as informal as fast food but not as serious as something like Bridges.

He swallowed a bit nervously. Applebee’s wasn’t a fancy restaurant by any means, but he still felt more and more like this was meant to be a date. “Okay,” he breathes, trying to make his anxiety inconspicuous. He swore to God, if Mabel was trying to play matchmaker, he would scream his head off at her later. He didn’t think he was emotionally prepared for a new relationship hours after his old one had been ended.

The car ride was longer than Dipper was hoping. He didn’t want to be stuck in a moving vehicle with Bill; it felt awkward for him. He didn’t know how Bill felt about it, and if he was being honest, he didn’t think he  _ wanted _ to know. Obviously, he still loved Dipper, but he wasn’t ready to hear him say that out loud. Dipper distracted himself with the sounds of the radio, the music filling the car atmosphere. He knew Bill had chosen the Top 40 Hits to listen to on purpose since it was Dipper’s favorite type of music. 

Applebee’s came into view about twenty minutes into the mostly silent drive. Dipper let go of a breath he didn’t realize he was holding when he saw the large building with a red apple on the front. Bill parked his car and they left the vehicle. Dipper slowly approaches the front door when the blond man runs in front of him and opens the door for him wordlessly. Dipper didn’t say anything either as he stepped inside the building, offering nothing but a small smile of appreciation, though he wasn’t a hundred percent sure he saw it.

Bill and Dipper were quickly seated at a table. They sat down and looked over their menus, trying to find something that looked appetizing. He eventually decided he would order the Grilled Chicken Breast, and Bill decided he would order the Fiesta Lime Chicken. The waiter came and took their orders, and then left, leaving the two men alone, in awkward silence.

Dipper didn’t know how to start a conversation. Awkward situations were  _ not _ his strong suit, not by a long-shot. Bill was definitely more suited to handle these kinds of things. He idly scrolled through Instagram on his phone, waiting for Bill to say something, desperately hoping Bill would understand he didn’t want to start a conversation.

He seemed to get the message. Bill cleared his throat and sat up straighter, catching Dipper’s attention. “So,” he says, “what’s been going on in your life? Y’know, except for the whole  _ my-bride-was-a-whore _ thing.”

Dipper cringed. Bill wasn’t the quietest talker in the world. “You could be a little less loud,” Dipper whispered, “and I guess I’m mostly fine. Not much has changed since the last time we saw each other.”

“When you say ‘saw each other,’ do you mean the time we broke up or the time we ran into each other at the grocery store, I said your name, and you refused to acknowledge my existence?” Bill didn’t mean for the words to come out so harshly, and they probably caught Dipper off guard. He immediately regretted it. Before he could apologize, Dipper spoke again.

“The breakup,” he said simply. “I’m mostly the same person you knew seven years ago.” God, he hated how he didn’t have anything else to add to that. His life was mostly uneventful; the most notable things happened with Pacifica, and of course, he just wanted to forget she ever came into his life in the first place. If they didn’t have anything to talk about, how were they going to reconnect? Ability to converse was even necessary for  _ platonic _ relationships to happen. 

“That’s good to hear,” Bill says, sighing and slouching a little in his seat. He didn’t know how to talk to Dipper if he kept giving dead-end answers. Suddenly, something to say came to his mind, and he sat straighter in his seat again. “I wouldn’t have wanted you to change.”

The (romantic) compliment caught the brown-haired boy off guard, and he blushed fiercely, not knowing how to top that. “Thanks,” he says sheepishly, and the smallest of smiles appears on his face, making him appear absolutely adorable. His heart ached again, the facial expression a reminder of the time they shared as teenagers. Bill recalled a specific night when they were dating—they were cuddled up on the sofa together, watching television, and Dipper’s nose was buried in the crook of Bill’s neck, drinking in the warmth that surrounded them.

“Bill?” Dipper’s voice snapped him out of his trance, bringing him back to reality.

“Oh,” he says. “Sorry, I just—flashback.”

Dipper blushed deeper. “Oh,” he says. He knew he must’ve been thinking back to their time as teenagers, madly in love, fueled by adolescent hormones. He tried not to dwell on it as he cleared his throat and shamed himself for wanting to ask what he was thinking about.

The food couldn’t have come fast enough. Dipper and Bill eagerly took their meals, and the younger boy stuffed his face to avoid having to talk. The chicken breast he ordered was very flavorful, and he closed his eyes and enjoyed the taste of it, grateful for a distraction from this incredibly awkward lunch.

Bill seemed to notice his discomfort and need to avoid talking. He spoke up, “Dipper, can I ask you something?” He hoped he wouldn’t be ruining this with the question he wanted to ask.

He nodded as he swallowed another bite of his chicken. “Of course, Bill.”

Bill felt like there  _ had _ to be a more courteous way of asking this, but he couldn’t think of it right now. He had to know how Dipper felt about him, albeit he knew that deadass  _ asking _ would seem weird. He stuttered as the question left his mouth. “Do you still have feelings for me?”  _ Oh Lord _ , he wished he could take back those words. Dipper immediately looked taken aback, like he didn’t know how to respond. Bill prayed that he didn’t hear him, or thought he misheard him. He took another bite of his food— _ oh fuck, he definitely heard, he’s just stalling. _

Eventually, after an  _ excruciatingly _ long time, he swallowed and spoke. “I honestly don’t know if I’m ready to answer that question. I mean, I just talked to you for the first time in seven years a few hours ago. And I’m still hurting from the whole Pacifica thing.” He put his fork down, trying to make it clear he wasn’t  _ not _ interested. “I’m just not emotionally ready for another relationship right now.”

Bill nodded, still very much hating himself for asking such a stupid question. “Okay. I get that.” The blond man went back to eating his food, knowing that if he still had a chance at a romantic relationship with him, that it would be slow. He would need a miracle for Dipper to say yes today.


	18. 5:00 PM - Speak of the Devil

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edits have been made, so the original posted version is slightly different from the version that is online now.

#  **5:00 PM - Speak of the Devil**

_Bill took his seat, sitting next to his apprehensive boyfriend, Dipper. This was the first time they had been able to go on a date in quite some time. Dipper was rather anxious about it. He tried not to let it show, even though Bill always saw through him. He knew Dipper too well._

_They looked each other in the eyes when they sat down. Dipper’s face was already red. “Are you nervous?” Bill asked him. He looked adorable when he was scared._

_He exhaled sharply. “I just—I’m really nervous. I mean, we haven’t been on a date in forever, and fancy places kind of give me anxiety, but I—I’ll be fine.” Dipper was visibly shaking._

_“Aww.” Bill adored when his Pine Tree was frightened. “You’re so cute.”_

_Dipper exhaled shakily, his face turning a deeper shade of scarlet. “Thanks.”_

_The waitress approached them and took their orders, leaving the couple alone at the dinner table. Bill and Dipper ate the bread they had in the basket at the table, not bothering to fill every second with conversation. They were the sort of couple that didn’t necessarily need to talk, they just enjoyed being in each other’s company._

_The food eventually came, and as Dipper voraciously devoured his pasta, Bill’s phone buzzed in his pocket. Weird, he thought he had put it on silent. When he unlocked his phone, he saw his friend Ethan had texted him._

**[9:42 PM]** _I can’t believe ur fucking the nerd_

 _Bill almost dropped his phone in horror—this text meant so many things. First, he knew who Dipper was. Second, he knew they were dating, Third, they were_ here _somehow. He knew how his friends felt about homosexuality, and he didn’t need their opinions on the matter. He was really more scared of it than anything else._

_Bill sent a message back:_

**[9:42 PM] what the fuck is that supposed to mean**

_Ethan responded faster than Bill could type._

**[9:42 PM]** _we know you’re going out with dipper pines_

 **[9:42 PM]** _how come you didn’t tell us this? we would want to know if u were a fag!_

 _Bill couldn’t believe it. He glanced up at his boyfriend, who was still happily devouring the food and went back to typing._ _His thumb hovered over the “Send” button before he thought he’d try something out, to see if his friends were actually here._

_He reached out and grabbed Dipper’s hand. Trying to make it seem normal and not out-of-place, his thumb brushed the ring sitting on his finger. He gave it to him just before the beginning of the school year for his birthday. “Are you feeling better, love?”_

_Dipper swallowed and sighed. “Yeah. I am.” He smiled and squeezed his hand._

_Bill smiled, too, and leaned in for a kiss, catching Dipper off guard. The kiss was gentle and soft, relaxing the brown-haired teenager’s nerves. He made sure that the kiss lasted more than five seconds, counting to six-and-a-half in his head. When he broke away, Dipper was blushing profusely once again. Bill waited for his phone to buzz; if his friends were here and watching him, they would’ve seen the kiss._

_Sure enough, Bill received a text on his phone not a minute later:_

**[9:44 PM]** _ugh u just kissed him_

 **[9:44 PM]** _we’re trying to eat y’know_

_Bill scowled. He sent a reply:_

**[9:44 PM]** **where the fuck are you**

**[9:44 PM] show yourselves**

**[9:44 PM]** _alright, we’ll come to your table_

 **[9:45 PM]** **NONONONONO**

**[9:45 PM] I’ll come to you**

**[9:45 PM]** **where the hell are you**

 **[9:45 PM]** _go to the men’s room_

_Bill sighed in frustration. “Uh, I’ll be right back,” he managed and excused himself to go to the bathroom without waiting for a response from his boyfriend._

_The blond teenager entered the nearest men’s room he could find and found his four friends laughing their asses off. “God, Bill, what the fuck is wrong with you?”_

_“Oh, what’s wrong with_ you _?!” Bill almost shouted. “This is the first date I’ve been on with him in a while!”_

 _“Dude, are you, like, actually serious? You’re in_ love? _!” one of his friends, Marcus, said incredulously._

 _“Yes. I know that love is such a fuckin’ foreign concept for someone like_ you _, but it exists, okay?! Why do you guys have to be so homophobic?!” It was completely uncalled for; Bill thought these guys were his friends, people he could trust. But when he showed actual human emotion, these guys wanted nothing to do with it. They only taunted him and called him a fag._

_“We don’t associate with any faggots,” Ethan spat. “If you still want that place of yours, you’re gonna have to drop him.”_

* * *

Ethan’s words still haunted Bill to this day. He couldn’t get them off of his mind as he drove himself and Dipper back from Applebee’s. Dipper didn’t seem to be displaying any obvious emotion, which was a step up from discomfort (which he had shown on the ride over here). Bill desperately wished he was smart enough to invent the time machine and go back to that night, do things differently. Maybe, if the planets aligned, someone would’ve actually approached them and helped him get out of his shitty situation instead of everyone looking away and ignoring the shouts that came from the men’s room.

When they reached Mabel’s house again, Dipper exited the car and went straight for the front door without a word. Mabel awaited them eagerly in her living room. She squealed and jumped up when she saw them enter. “How did it go?!” she asked, giddy and gleeful, happiness sugarcoating her words.

Confused as to why Mabel was so excited for their return, Dipper raised an eyebrow. “It was...fine,” he said. “Why are you so happy?”

“Nothing! Can’t I be happy to see my bro-bro and his ex-boyfriend?”

“Historically, no,” Dipper quips.

Bill enters without a word, sitting next to Mabel. “Are you okay?” Bill asks him.

Dipper sighed for the millionth time today. “I think I’m fine,” he says. “I’m just exhausted. After everything. I’ve been up since midnight, so I should probably rest.”

Mabel nods. “That’d probably be a good idea,” she says. “If you ever need anything, just remember you can always call me, okay?”

Dipper offers her a small smile. “Thanks.”

* * *

Upon returning home, the brown-haired man immediately lied face-down in his mattress, wanting nothing more than to immediately go to sleep. Today had been so overwhelming and so much bullshit had been thrown his way; relaxation was necessary. He would’ve fallen asleep the second his head hit the pillow if it hadn’t been for a thought that occurred to him.

He grabbed his phone, which was still in his pocket, and opened up the Messages app, selecting Pacifica’s name and choosing “block number.” Then, he went into all of his social media apps--Snapchat, Twitter, and Instagram--and blocked her there, too. He didn’t want to speak to her _ever_ again. It really should go without saying that the wedding was off and that their relationship was forever finished. He wouldn’t have to deal with that bitch any longer.

As if on cue, there was a knock at his door. He _really_ didn’t want to have to deal with anyone right now, but he knew it would be rude if he were just to remain in his bed without responding. Dipper stands up and opens the door, repulsed by the person he sees standing in front of him. “Hi, Dipper.”

Anger comes rushing back all at once, giving him a headache as his heart rate increases dramatically. _Speak of the devil._ “What the fuck do you want, Pacifica?” he spits, vomiting her name out like it was a vulgarity. 

She looks down at the floor and purses her lips. “Can I talk to you?”

“No!” he exclaims. “There is _nothing_ to talk about. You cheated on me again. You don’t love me. I will never marry you. End of story.” Dipper closes the door when Pacifica puts her hand on it, stopping it from closing.

“Babe, _please_ hear me out.”

“No!” he shouted. “What the hell aren’t you getting about this?! _I don’t love you anymore! And you obviously NEVER DID!_ ” Dipper’s voice rose by a million decibels in no time flat. There was a high chance that any neighbors that were home at the time were listening in. “WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!”

“Dipper--” Pacifica’s breath caught in her throat as if it was becoming more difficult to speak. “I never meant to hurt you, really--”

“Oh, SHUT THE FUCK UP!” Dipper screamed. _“You knew what you were doing the WHOLE TIME! You NEVER loved me, not for ONE MINUTE! GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!”_ Dipper slams the door in her face and tears start to roll down his cheek. The emotional wounds that had gone numb had begun to bleed profusely once again.

Pacifica _wanted_ to torture him with her lies and her fake love. She didn’t know the meaning of the word “love.” To her, it was a game that she wanted desperately to win. She didn’t care if she hurt other people. She didn’t care about the lasting damage she caused people. She was comparable to a serial killer, collecting her victim’s hearts as trophies, keeping them in a jar or some other fucked-up shit like that. Pacifica was a heartless sociopath. She must never feel any emotion. No remorse, no love, no happiness, no sadness, no pain. A robot.

It was definitely for the best that he forget about her.

* * *

Pacifica didn’t feel much of anything as she drove to Mabel’s house to try out her backup plan. She didn’t think Dipper would resist her for a second time, but anything was possible. She was going to talk to Mabel, to see if she could get her to help.

The ride to her home didn’t take very long. The blonde woman knocked on the door, inhaling and putting on the mask she would wear in front of Dipper’s sister. In order to win this chess game, you had to know how to act in front of other people, switching masks, never revealing what’s truly underneath.

Some might say nothing is underneath.

“Coming!” came a familiar, cheery voice from the other side of the door. Mabel opened the door, and her expression hardened the moment she laid eyes on her.

Pacifica quickly realized this was going to be much harder than she previously anticipated. “Mabel, I need your help.”

“You don’t need _shit,_ ” she exclaimed in disgust.

Bill came to the door, concerned. “Mabel, who is i--” Bill’s heart stopped when he saw who was at the door. He couldn’t _believe it,_ that this cock-sucking _cunt_ came back to try to steal Dipper _again_ . She thought he was stupid, gullible, that he never learned. Dipper was anything but stupid. He was an amazing, intelligent, adorable, caring, kind-hearted, low self-esteem, handsome little dork. He wasn’t stupid, but he _did_ need someone to protect him.

But Pacifica was not that person.

“The fuck do you want?!” he yelled. “Dipper wants nothing to do with you! He’s not even here!” It was all he could do not to strangle her. _“Fuck off!”_

“Bill, _please,_  I know you’re mad--”

“ _MAD?!_ _You fucking BROKE my Pine Tree into pieces, you WHORE! You don’t get another chance with him!”_ Bill didn’t care how loud he was now. If the whole world heard him scream, he would love that. The world needed to know Pacifica Northwest was an awful human being.

“He’s right,” Mabel concurs. “You _destroyed_ my brother. You _shattered him. TWICE.”_ She said this slowly as she took steps closer to her, making sure she would get the message. _“You’re an ungrateful SLUT! How many times did you think Dipper would fall for your bullshit?!”_

Pacifica began to mimic hyperventilating. _“It’s not bullshit!”_

“Shut the fuck up.” Bill has murder in his eyes. If he and Pacifica were alone, he would definitely do something unspeakable. “You don’t care about _anyone_ but yourself. Wake the fuck up. He doesn’t love you, and neither does _anyone else._ ” He turned around and re-entered Mabel’s house. The brunette gave Pacifica the middle finger as she joined him.

Pacifica was left alone there, with no way to win back Dipper. She walked back to her car and started the engine, thinking about how her opponent--Dipper’s desire to break free--might have just won this match.

She stared blankly into space for a few minutes, mind completely blank. Pacifica always _won_ her chess games; she never forfeited or gave up, even when it looked like she had been checkmated. She wasn’t the kind of person that knew when she had lost--to her, there was never a “the end,” only a “to be continued.”

Perhaps her game would have to continue with someone new.


	19. 6:00 PM - How Much I Miss You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yo!  
> thanks for sticking with us. I (incognitoburrito) have felt like the chapters have been a bit lackluster lately, so I'm sorry if they have been. These last few closing hours will wrap up the story with a happy ending, though a lot of what leads up to that will be painful.
> 
> Merry Christmas.

#  **6:00 PM - How Much I Miss You**

Bill sat on Mabel’s sofa, head in his hands. It had been about ten minutes since Pacifica showed up at her door, and he still couldn’t believe it. He almost felt bad for her; she was practically soulless. He didn’t know what kind of sick pleasure she got out of manipulating people and taking away their dignity.

Mabel was pacing around her living room, equally as surprised, disgusted and confused as he was--but mainly disgusted. “Seriously, who the hell does she think she is?!” she shouted indignantly. “Just  _ showing up here _ like--like she even has the  _ right  _ to be here! And  _ asking for my help _ ? What the hell?!” She was  _ fuming. _ Pacifica didn’t have the right to even be  _ near  _ her doorstep or set foot on her lawn at this point, let alone ask her for her  _ help _ ! She was a kind person, but she wasn’t stupid.

After what that blonde bitch had done, Bill didn’t blame her for being angry as well. Hell, he was pissed off too. She  _ did  _ need help--psychiatric help. Desperate help to be a better person. They weren’t going to  _ help _ her ruin other people’s lives. Unfortunately, it didn’t seem like Pacifica even learned her lesson here. “Honestly, I didn’t think that bitch would have the guts to show up around here after the wedding.”

“Me neither!” She plopped down beside Bill on the couch shooting a narrow glance at the door, as if she was warding off the woman who’d been there a while ago. She still couldn’t believe that skank. How they saw anything good in her before was beyond her now. They all fell for her little game. She groaned in frustration before reaching over for the phone and dialing a number that had been engraved into her memory for a while.

Bill lifted his head at the familiar dial tones and looked over at the brunette. “What are you doing?” 

“I’m calling Dipper. I’m too angry to pace.” The phone only rang a few times before the call was finally picked up.

“Mabel?” Dipper’s voice came through. “What’s up?”

“Dipper, I know you probably don’t want to talk about this, but  _ God _ , you will not believe what just happened.”

A moment of silence passed. “...Did Pacifica show up at your doorstep too?”

“Yeah!” Mabel paused. “Wait,  _ what? _ ” She could clearly hear the distinct sound of jingling keys on the other end. “How long ago was she over there?”

“ _ Who _ was over there?” Bill asked. Mabel shushed him, mouthing ‘Pacifica,’ making Bill bristle. Dipper paused for a second before speaking. “Almost an hour ago, maybe half. I don’t know.” The sound of something heavy closing came with it. “What did she come to you for?”

“Almost half an hour ago?” Mabel was only even more pissed off hearing that. That meant she’d gone to Dipper first and when he rejected her, Pacifica decided to come to her for help after Dipper said no. The nerve of some people. “She came for my help getting you back,” she huffed. “We didn’t really let her talk.”

“We?”

“Oh yeah, Bill was here when she came over. We kinda slammed the door in her face,” Mabel explained.

“Kind of?”

“ _ Definitely _ slammed the door in her face.”

“And cussed her out!” Bill so helpfully added, albeit her phone wasn’t on speaker and Dipper couldn’t exactly hear him well. She shot him a look once and he quickly backed off.

“Well, thanks for that, I guess,” he sighed. “I’m really hoping she finally got the hint that I don’t want to see her anymore.”

“Ugh, me too, bro-bro. You’re too good to be played like that again. I mean, like--who do you think you are? Running ‘round leaving scars--”

“ _ Mabel _ .”

“Collecting your jar of heartsss...” Her voiced picked up in volume and tempo, much to Dipper’s dismay.

“Mabel,  _ please _ .”

“Tearing love apaaart!” She stretched out the “a” sound without any doubt her brother was cringing now. Mabel could even see Bill cringing a bit and she couldn’t help but grin.

“Mabel, I’m trying to drive. I can’t do that with your awful singing.” Dipper said. Mabel gasped in offense.

“ _ Rude!  _ My singing is great!”

“Your singing is better than Bill’s over the phone, I’ll give you that.”

“Damn right! I’m the best replacement for your car radio you’re ever gonna get!” 

Both twins laughed at Mabel’s ridiculousness. She felt herself relax a bit, albeit she was still a bit miffed by Pacifica’s rude entrance. She had a feeling the blonde woman would leave them alone now, having been rejected on both sides. That, and it would be easier to give up than ever think she had a chance with Dipper again--unless she wanted a broken nose, which Mabel was ready to give her at any moment if she dared ruin the holiday further.

Her thoughts reminded her of one of the reasons she’d originally called. “Oh! Are you coming over? I know with everything that happened today you must be like super tired, but I really want you here with us for Christmas Eve.”

“Relax, Mabel. I wouldn’t miss spending the holidays with you for the world,” Dipper reassured. He still felt like trash, of course--he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t. But he always spent Christmas with Mabel. It wouldn’t be right to not show up because of some person that tried to ruin Christmas with her sluttiness. Besides, he could use a little holiday cheer with people who actually cared about him. “I’m on my way now.” 

“Great! I’ll see you in a bit, then?”

“Yep, see you.” The call ended with that. Once Mabel put her phone down, she noticed how intently Bill was staring at her. She rolled her eyes. “You know, twin conversations are supposed to have some  _ privacy _ , right?”

Bill groaned, “Come on, Mabel. What did he say?” He knew he shouldn’t be as pushy as he was, but he couldn’t help it when it came to Dipper. Even if they were on semi-good terms now, they still weren’t quite there yet. Not enough to have such an easy conversation like Mabel. He was curious with the mention of Pacifica having gone over to his house.

Well, curious was an understatement.

Thankfully, Mabel decided he had enough torture for the day, “Alright, alright.” She began recapping her call with Dipper. “Well, turns out, Pacifica decided to talk to him  _ first _ and then came here for help when she found out Dipper wasn’t taking her back.”

“Serves the bitch right. She doesn’t deserve him,” he huffed, and Mabel couldn’t help but nod in agreement.

“I don’t think she’s gonna bother us anymore, though.” Mabel paused before adding, “Oh, he also thinks your singing is terrible.”

“Wait—what?” Bill was taken aback by that. “That can’t be right.” Did Dipper really think he was a terrible singer?

“I heard him with my own two ears, Bill.” Mabel insisted, though her sincerity was debatable. He narrowed his eyes.

“You’re lying to me. You are a filthy liar.”

“Am I, though?” Mabel said in a teasing tone. Bill tossed one of her throw pillows at her. She giggled in response, throwing it back at him. “Believe me or not, he’s coming over soon, so you better be the best damn gentleman you can be if you ever wanna win his heart back!” she playfully scolded.

* * *

 

Dipper knocked on the door, standing at Mabel's doorstep, mental condition not any better. The relief from the phone call was only temporary; he felt like he wanted to die.

“Hey, bro-bro!” Mabel exclaimed as she opened the door and let him inside. Dipper didn't want to see Bill, so he was unsurprised and disappointed to see he was still here.

“Hi, Pine Tree,” Bill says awkwardly.

The term of endearment still gave Dipper nostalgia. He'd always used it, no matter where they were or what they were doing. Dipper didn't know how he felt about Bill using it now, seven years later. It didn't make him feel  _ uncomfortable, _ but he couldn't say he liked it.

“Hi, Bill,” he responded, sitting down on the opposite side of the room. Dipper's hands were hidden inside his pockets and he had a timid look on his face; his cheeks appeared to be a burning red. The way Dipper looked gave Bill another flashback. It was Dipper's birthday, and Bill was spending the night with him, entangled in blankets and watching movies.

_ Dipper and Bill held each other while watching the movie on the TV, though they weren't paying much attention to it. Instead, they were sharing a few kisses, running their hands along each other's bodies. _

_ Bill leaned down to gently press kisses to Dipper's neck, softly nipping the skin, making Dipper moan quietly. “Do you like that?” he had whispered in his ear. _

_ Dipper responded with nothing but a “mm-hm” and a kiss to his cheek, raking his nails along Bill's scalp. He exhaled, loving the sensation. He wanted  _ more  _ of his Pine Tree. _

_ Bill's hands snuck up Dipper's shirt, eagerly feeling the cold skin beneath the fabric. His kisses became rougher as Bill got on top of him and Dipper's moans gradually increased in volume. Before long, Bill's hands had taken off Dipper's shirt and he'd pinned him against the couch. His face was red, his cheeks burning. _

“Bill? Bill!”

The blonde man blinked twice, suddenly returning to existence after being snapped out of the shamefully pleasurable flashback. “Oh. Sorry, I just—memory.”

Dipper nodded and didn't ask what it was about. Instead, he asked, “Why do you always have flashbacks whenever you look at me?”

He blinked again. “What?”

“At lunch, you were staring at me, and when you finally snapped out of it, you said you were remembering something. Why do you keep flashing back to things whenever you look at me?”

He shrugged. “Not sure. I guess—” He wanted to choose his words carefully, so as not to tell him that he had been thinking about the times they were having sex as teenagers. “—y’know, some of your mannerisms remind me of things we used to do in high school.”

Dipper pursed his lips. “Oh.” The response was quiet, barely audible, and slightly shy. Bill was suddenly scared he had said the wrong thing.

Mabel, who Bill and Dipper had forgotten about, cleared her throat and stood up. She began talking, and she knew Dipper was listening, but he wasn't. He was staring into space as his train of thought led him down a path he loathed. 

Bill's heart had been aching ever since the day he forced himself to disconnect from Dipper. Every day, he wished he would've done things different. Every day, he wished he would've defended his boyfriend instead of succumb to fear and selfishness. Every day, he prayed that God would reset time and let him have another chance. But his chance never came.

And now, with a newly-single Dipper in front of him seven years later, he's never felt farther apart from him. Dipper was distant; he had forgiven him but still didn't want to talk to him. Bill understood he wasn't emotionally ready for another relationship, but it was like Dipper didn't even want to be  _ friend _ s. He desperately wanted to hold him in his arms again, to kiss the muscle on his arms and rake his nails through his hair. Bill craved the sound of his own name in Dipper's voice; he used to hear it every day when they dated, how he would exclaim it with such joy and passion— _ God _ , nothing in the world was more beautiful than Dipper Pines, this adorable, incredibly strong, sexy, intelligent ball of happiness that deserved the entire fucking world.

In that moment, Bill's heart hurt like it had never hurt before. He felt completely lost, like he had been dropped in a cave with a flashlight, but the batteries were dead. He  _ needed  _ someone to help him; he needed Dipper by his side again.

Bill simply couldn't live without him.

“I'll be right back,” Bill says, excusing himself to go to the bathroom. He locks the door behind him and collapses onto the floor, silently sobbing into his hands.

_ If only you knew how much I miss you. _


	20. 7:00 PM - Snap Out of It, Motherfucker

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: cliffhanger.  
> Vii is an angel, they did 60% of the work. Love you, Vii. <3

#  **7:00 PM - Snap Out of It, Motherfucker**

Mabel wanted to yeet something across the room.

She knew  _ exactly _ why Bill had excused himself out of the living room so suddenly; it was written plainly on his face. Mabel wanted to scream out in anger. Bill was torn to pieces because Dipper was acting like he wanted nothing to do with him, but she knew what was  _ really _ happening. Dipper was still in denial of his feelings for him, and it was tearing Bill apart. Mabel took a deep breath in an attempt to calm herself down, to no avail. Finally, she took a throw pillow on her sofa and began to beat her brother with it. “WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!” she yelled in fury, catching her brother completely off guard. She was met with a waterfall of protest and complaint from Dipper, shielding himself with his arms and curling up into a ball.

“HEY! WHAT THE HELL?!” Dipper exclaimed, trying to fight off Mabel with the little strength he had. Eventually, Mabel ceased her attacks, and Dipper used his hands to straighten his hair out again. “Mabel, what the  _ hell  _ is wrong with  _ you?! _ ”

“Can’t you see why Bill is so upset?!” she yelled at him.

Dipper was confused as hell as to why Mabel was acting like this. “He seemed fine to me! Why are you acting so angry?!”

“Because you’re  _ hurting  _ him and it’s OBVIOUS AS FUCK!” Mabel almost screamed, much to her brother’s shock. Mabel only cussed to add humor to something she said; when she said something that was vulgar and unfunny, it could only mean she was absolutely  _ furious _ .

_ How was he hurting him? _ All they did was have a conversation, Mabel explained what they were going to do, and Bill went to the bathroom. Dipper stayed silent and did nothing the whole time! “What did I do wrong?!”

“You’re SCARED to tell him how you feel, and it’s DESTROYING him,” she hissed. “You’re in TOTAL denial of your feelings for Bill because you’re too SCARED of being hurt all over again! SNAP OUT OF IT,  _ MOTHERFUCKER!” _

Dipper stood up and immediately became defensive, matching Mabel’s volume and intensity when he spoke, trying to battle this demon that came out when Mabel became angry. It was never a pretty sight, and once it began, it was next to impossible to stop. “I’m not _ready_ for another relationship right now! I need some time to _get over Pacifica!_ _And I’m not even in LOVE with Bill!”_ He didn’t understand why he couldn’t just have some space, some time to think without being pounced on like a piece of meat. He might consider getting back together with Bill, but he didn’t want to do it now. He still had too many emotions to work through; a new romantic relationship would only do more harm than good.

Mabel clenched her teeth and stepped closer to him.  _ “BULL. SHIT,” _ she spat, mirroring what Tambry had told him a few short hours ago. She knew her brother too well. He wasn’t  _ emotionally unprepared  _ for a new relationship, he was  _ scared _ of one because of all the pain associated with it. If he were emotionally unprepared, he would still be hurting over Pacifica. But Mabel knew her brother’s mind like the back of her hand. When someone betrays Dipper once, they’re on thin ice with him, and if they mess up again, Dipper’s completely ready to drop them like a hot potato and never look back. He wasn’t in love with Pacifica any longer. He wasn’t attached to her, and he didn’t have any trouble getting rid of her. He literally cussed her out on the altar and slapped her across the face!

As her train of thought continued, something occurred to her: after the first time she cheated on him, Dipper never really loved her. He was trying to  _ convince himself _ he did. What he really wanted was to find someone new, someone he could trust with his whole heart. Someone that would treat him right, and make sure he felt like the happiest man in the world. Pacifica had been failing to do that from the moment Dipper and she got back together all those years ago. Dipper never fully trusted her again. Her adultery cut him so deeply in his heart that it damaged his ability to have full faith in someone. But even now, with Pacifica permanently out of his life, those scars still lingered. They have morphed themselves into  _ fears,  _ and if there’s one thing Dipper hates the most, it’s facing his fears.

Dipper loves Bill. She  _ knows _ he does. The morning’s events were screaming that message at him for a reason. He has an unconditional and undying love for Bill, but because of what he and Pacifica did to him, his ability to trust someone’s been damaged and he’s  _ afraid _ to admit he has these feelings because he doesn’t  _ want  _ to have them. What was really angering Mabel was that he couldn’t see that Bill wasn’t going to hurt him.

Ever since the moment Bill poured his heart out to Mabel, she always saw sincerity and true emotion in him. He was someone that wanted to give Dipper the whole world, to treat him like a king and be the best goddamn partner anyone could ask for. It was Bill’s fear that drove him to destroy their first relationship, and Dipper couldn’t see that he was  _ genuinely sorry. _ Mabel is very good at reading people, and she could tell that Bill _ was not lying.  _ He was trying to fix their relationship, to restore what once was, but Dipper wouldn't let him do that because he was scared of loving someone again.

“You’re not understanding that Bill’s actually sorry,” Mabel explained to him, voice quieter, but still every bit as serious. “You’re not understanding that  _ no one _ , not even Bill, is going to hurt you anymore. If you really  _ weren’t  _ ready for another relationship, that would mean you’d still be crying over Pacifica, but _ you’re not _ . You dropped her like a hot potato  _ immediately _ when you found out she was a whore because you were  _ ready _ to let go of her. You didn’t want her because you didn’t trust her anymore. You wanted to go back to Bill, but because of what he did, you were too scared to. And now you’re scared of love because in  _ every experience  _ you’ve had, you’ve ended up getting hurt.” Mabel took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. She had obviously hurt Dipper with her words, as tears were falling down his face now. Gently, she added, “Bill’s not going to hurt you.  _ I know you love him. _ But _ you  _ need to talk to him. Your feelings are raw. You need to heal, you  _ twat. _ ”

Dipper stared at his sister. Normally, at any other moment that Mabel would’ve used a British insult, he would’ve laughed, but he was too shocked to laugh.  _ Was Dipper really this transparent? _ Mabel had this almost-magical ability to see through everyone’s bullshit so well (except in Pacifica’s case, of course). He didn’t want to admit that she was right...but it was highly likely she was. The  _ dominant emotion  _ he experienced throughout this entire day was  _ fear _ . When he woke up, he was scared that his suppressed memories about Bill were going to interfere with his marriage. He was scared that he had accidentally chosen the wrong person to spend the rest of his life with. After the wedding, he was scared that Mabel and Bill were dating. He was scared of forgiving Bill. He was scared of Tambry when she yelled at him for being scared of forgiving Bill. He was scared during the lunch at Applebee’s.

Dipper was scared of everything.

Even now, he was scared of doing the wrong thing, of letting someone in. He wanted to trust Bill, but fear still lingered. He bit his lip and looked anywhere but at Mabel. “I can’t.”

“You can,” Mabel insisted. “You can and you have to. I know you’re scared but you can’t keep living in fear of who’s going to hurt you and what might happen if you just let him in.” She continued, voice firm enough to get her point across. “Bill would never hurt you, not on purpose. He just wants to fix things with you. You don’t have to even stay with him for the rest of your life if you don’t want to, but just _talk_ to him, Dipper! You’re tearing him and yourself apart by just being scared of what-ifs and questions over and over! For once in your life, turn off your head,” she pointed a finger at his forehead, her finger just barely grazing the asterism hidden behind his hair, “and start listening to your heart.” She jabbed a finger at his chest while looking him in the eyes, sighing. “You have nothing to be afraid of with Bill, so just talk to him, okay? I want you to be happy, Dipper, and I wouldn’t tell you all this if I knew it wouldn’t make you happy.”

Dipper, at that moment, realized two things as he tried to fight the new wave of tears forming. The first, being that he hated how transparent and easy he was to read in Mabel’s eyes. The second, that she was also right. She was right about a lot of things and he wanted to tell her that talking to Bill would be easier said than done; he couldn’t just turn off his fears, after all.

But he didn’t want to be scared anymore.

He didn’t want to keep lying to himself either or make anyone else unhappy, and deep down, he wanted to fix things too. Because even after everything that's happened, he still loved Bill.

And Bill loved him too. He knew he did, and it was hard to swallow that.

“Okay,” he breathed out, “I’ll go talk to him. Thanks, Mabel.” He smiled down at her and her expression relaxed.

“Don’t mention it.” She smiled back and stuck her arms out, “Awkward sibling hug?”

Dipper laughed a bit then, “Awkward sibling hug,” he replied and hugged her back, pats exchanged and said in unison. 

“Go get ‘em, Dippy,” Mabel whispered in encouragement. Once they separated, Dipper sighed, knowing exactly what he was about to do. “I’ll be back," he told her as he walked toward the bathroom.

He couldn’t help but pause at the door, like the gears in his body just decided to lock up and stare and his fear from earlier. As if it had just come back in waves. He wanted to just turn back and leave things be the way they were. They couldn’t possibly be _that_ bad, right? 

But they were. He knew they were. 

Turning back and avoiding Bill wouldn’t be right. It wouldn’t be fair to the guy he'd always loved.

Not to mention, Mabel would skewer him if he didn’t go through with it after what she’d said. There was no way out of this. With a moment of brief hesitation, he knocked on the door. His hand felt numb.

“ _ Not now, Mabel, _ ” came a voice on the other end. It was muffled but sounded stuffy. Almost like Bill had been crying. He bit his lip.

“It’s, uh, Dipper," he replied. There was a heavy amount of silence on the other side, then a shuffle. Suddenly, Bill’s voice sounded a lot closer than it was a few moments ago. 

" _ What do you want?” _

“I need to talk to you.” He pressed a hand against the door. “Can you come out?” He bit his lip and added, “please.”

There was another deafening pause. It had Dipper’s worries whirling back but quickly ended by the response given on the other side of the door. “ _ Give me a second _ .”

“Okay," he said quietly, a bit relieved. He backed away a bit from the door. 

_He was really going to do this, wasn’t he?_

The door clicked open to reveal the messy haired blond man. He looked fine for someone who had just been crying. In fact, if Dipper didn’t know any better, he’d say Bill hadn’t shed a single tear. However, the stuffiness in his voice gave him away; it pained him. “What do you want to talk about?” Bill asked, those soft, honey-brown eyes of Bill's eyes on him.

Immediately, Dipper felt his confidence waver having his eyes watching him. He always had Bill’s full attention whether he liked it or not, both then and now. He was the only one Bill ever had eyes for.

“I--Remember what you asked me at Applebee's?” he started, that seemed as good a place as any to begin this.

Judging by Bill’s body language, he wasn't sure where this was going. “Yeah.”

“And remember what I told you?” he asked with a bit of hesitation.  “Well...I might be ready to answer that now.”

“What?” 

“Bill, I still love you."


	21. 8:00 PM - Kiss

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is 1745 words; we're sorry it's shorter than usual. We hope you enjoy.

#  **8:00 PM - Kiss**

Bill blinked twice. The hairs stood up on his neck, and goosebumps rose everywhere.

_What did he just say?_

“Pine Tree--”

“Wait,” he says, cutting him off, taking a deep breath. He couldn’t believe what he’d just heard. Dipper must’ve been mistaken somehow; there was no way Dipper could feel love for him. What he did was terrible, and it was clear Dipper didn’t fully forgive him yet. He still appeared frightened, too scared to let anyone in. He couldn’t say he loved him _this quickly_ ; it wasn’t possible. “Mabel said the reason why I kept saying I wasn’t ready for a new relationship was because I was scared to start one because of how much you hurt me and how much Pacifica hurt me, and that I need to wake up because you won’t hurt me anymore,” he continues, echoing his thoughts. Dipper was shaking, and he was fidgeting with his hands; he was clearly nervous. “She told me she could tell I still loved you, and that I wanted to be with someone else and not Pacifica the whole time because when she cheated on me the first time, she broke the trust. But I wasn’t acting on my love for you because I was scared of leaving Pacifica, of going to someone else--of going back to you--and being hurt again.” Bill’s head swam, overwhelmed by the sheer amount of information Dipper was throwing at him. “I don’t want to be scared anymore.”

Bill held his breath. _Dipper was scared because Bill and Pacifica hurt him._ It truly created a shooting, stabbing pain in his heart, knowing that he was responsible for scarring him. It was his fault that his Pine Tree was afraid of love. He didn’t want to tell him how he felt because Dipper was _scared of him._ He wanted to slump to the floor and cry again, but he bit his tongue and willed the tears away. “Pine Tree…” He really didn’t know what to say--he thought he’d already said everything he could. He felt his voice break. “I’m _so sorry_ for scaring you out of love. I swear to God, I _never meant to hurt you._ I was a stupid teenager that was scared of having to go back to my abusive parents--”

“See, that’s why this isn’t your fault,” Dipper interrupts. “It’s mine. I didn’t let myself forgive you because I didn’t want to hear your reasoning behind it. I should’ve let you explain yourself. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize,” Bill says immediately, putting his hands on Dipper’s shoulders. Dipper was still one or two feet shorter than Bill, so he was looking down at him as he said this. “I didn’t want to explain myself when we broke up. This isn’t your fault.”

“Yes, it is,” Dipper insisted, looking down at the ground in shame. “You _wanted_ to explain yourself _after_ we broke up. I didn't let you. I never wanted to look at you, never wanted to talk to you. I didn’t want anything to do with you. I was in denial.”

Bill sighed. “Do you really...I mean, you _really_ think you love me?”

The smaller man stared up into the blond man’s eyes. “I know that I wasn’t happy when you weren’t a part of my life,” he confesses. “The last time I remember being _truly content_ without a care in the world is when I’m with you. All of my best memories happened with you, or Mabel, or both.” His cheeks turned beet red as he went on. “I mean, true happiness is true love, isn’t it?”

Bill found it more and more difficult to resist the tears. “Can I hug you?” he whispered, not wanting Dipper to see him cry.

He blinked. “Yeah.”

Bill immediately pulled Dipper into his arms, burying his face in his shoulder and breathing in his delicious scent. Only then did he let himself cry. “I’ve wanted to hold you like this for so long,” Bill whispers. “I’ve missed this so fucking much.”

The brown-haired man hesitantly wrapped his arms around Bill’s torso. The feeling was somehow familiar and alien at the same time. “I’ve missed you, too.” Dipper wanted to cry, but there weren’t any tears coming up, so he decided to soak in the feeling of hugging his ex-lover for the first time in seven years as much as possible. Bill’s embrace was steadily growing tighter, but he didn’t mind.

Neither of them knew how long they stood there, holding each other. Bill lost track of time as he was intoxicated by the nostalgic smell of Dipper’s hair, and his clothes. He hadn’t changed a bit since they last saw each other. It was the same scent that lingered all over his skin when he was pressing kisses down his body. It was the same scent that Bill hoped to eventually wake up to every morning. It was the same scent that made him want to laugh and scream and cry and jump.

_God, how he missed that scent._

Bill wanted to kiss Dipper’s neck, but he wasn’t sure if Dipper was ready for that, so he just dug his nose into the crook of his neck and stayed there for a long time. Eventually, they broke away, and Dipper saw the many tears rolling down Bill’s face. “I forgot how nice it felt, to be held by you,” Dipper muttered, not wanting to look straight at Bill. He was still a bit embarrassed.

Bill swallowed. “Are you still scared of being in love?”

“Not with you.” Dipper stared at his feet. “I really do think you’re sorry, so there’s nothing to be scared of anymore, is there?”

Bill wanted to scream with joy. He didn’t think this evening would turn in this direction. _It really was the season of miracles._ “No,” he says. “I don’t want you to be scared of me. You don’t have to be.” Bill bit his tongue before saying the three words he’s wanted to say for forever. “I love you.”

Dipper seemed to be taken aback, and he wondered if that was the wrong thing to say. Before his train of thought could lead him down a darker path of worry and doubt, Dipper spoke up. “I’m...not sure if I’m ready to say that back to you. But I want to.”

The blond man nodded. “That’s okay.” He stared at Dipper’s cheek. “Is it okay if I kiss you?”

Dipper blushed again. “Sure,” he whispered softly and apprehensively.

Bill ran a thumb across his face, and pulled his cheek to his lips. He didn't think he would ever get to do this again, kiss his Pine Tree like this, being so close to him once again. He'd give anything to kiss him on those plush lips of his, but he knew that would was moving a bit too soon. The last thing he wanted was to make his Pine Tree uncomfortable or scared again, but he couldn't help but feel _overwhelmingly happy_ by just being able to press a simple kiss to his cheek.

Dipper didn’t expect to feel so happy from this kiss. He expected to be nervous or anxious, or possibly even scared again, but it was relaxing. He enjoyed the feel of Bill’s lips on his skin. He didn’t know if that was a good or bad thing, but at this point, he didn’t really care. Dipper knew that Bill was the only person he _wanted_ to be with; he didn’t want to find someone new.

When Bill broke away from the kiss, Dipper felt like he craved _more_ of Bill’s kiss, something that lasted longer. Without thinking, Dipper places his hand on the back of Bill’s head and pulls his lips to his own.

Bill was shocked, caught off guard by the action he didn’t think Dipper would take. The kiss was soft, careful, and over much too soon, Before he could even recover from his shock and react to it, the brown-haired man pulled away with a heavy blush on his cheeks. “Sorry,” he apologized quickly, looking anywhere but at Bill. He felt embarrassed for losing control of himself like that. “I just--I wanted to try that again,” he explained, a bit self-conscious with the way Bill was staring at him--a mixture of shock, surprise, and something else he couldn’t identify in that moment. It made his heart skip a beat, how _flustered_ the other man looked.

“Bill?” he said, trying to snap the blonde man out of his shocked state. “Are...are you okay?”

Bill seemed to stumble over his words for a moment, unsure of how or what to say but when Dipper least expected it, he was being pulled back into yet another kiss. He gave a small noise of surprise as Bill’s lips crashed back against his, kissing him with a passion that would have toppled him over if Bill weren’t holding him up.

It was with an intensity he’d never felt before which was both overwhelming and exhilarating. He found himself kissing back and wrapping his arms around the other's neck in an insatiable need to deepen the kiss, to which Bill easily complied. They both had missed this, from the other's scent, to the taste of their lips, it was hard not to get carried away. In a swift movement, Bill had Dipper pressed against the wall. Dipper made a soft groan after being pressed against the hard surface so suddenly, but he wasn’t complaining. Both men pulled apart, gasping for air, having left each other more than just breathless.

They were both too absorbed in the moment and trying to catch their breaths that they hardly noticed the footsteps inching closer and closer.

“Well, it’s about damn time!” Mabel chimed in. “Not that I’m not happy for you guys, but I’d kinda appreciate it if you didn’t fuck in the hallway please, thanks.”

Dipper immediately turned red for the millionth time tonight, startled by his sister's sudden presence and vulgar language. “Oh…sorry.” He tucked tufts of his hair back behind his ear and tried to look casual. Bill had forgotten how cute he looked when he was flustered. It made him want to kiss him again, but with Mabel there, that probably wasn’t the best idea.

Bill held Dipper's hand and smiled at him, suddenly feeling so much better about the future ahead of them, now that he finally had his Pine Tree back by his side.


	22. 9:00 PM - A Painfully Nostalgic Dinner

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! So this chapter is 1.7k words, so we're sorry it's shorter, but it gets the point across.  
> Sorry, since this ends on an angsty cliffhanger.
> 
> Love you all. ❤❤❤

#  **9:00 PM - A Painfully Nostalgic Dinner**

Mabel was ecstatic that Bill and Dipper were finally back together again...sort of. None of the three knew if Bill and Dipper were boyfriends again yet, but even if they weren’t, passionate kisses were great progress. She forced them out of the house once again so Bill could buy him dinner. During the car ride, Bill thought about how he could ask Dipper if he would consider being his boyfriend again.

He felt like the question was inevitable after their encounter in the hallway, but he still wasn’t sure if Dipper was going to say yes because he wasn’t able to say “I love you.” Well, _technically_ he did when he said “Bill, I still love you,” but he probably just said that to summarize his complex emotions. Maybe, if the date went well, after the dinner was over, he’d pop the question.

Eventually, the two men arrived at the restaurant. Bill held Dipper’s hand as they walked into the building and were seated at a table. Dipper didn’t know what to say to Bill, so he pulled his phone out again and scrolled through his social media feeds, waiting for Bill to start a conversation.

Dipper hated how awkward he was being. He wished he was better at starting conversations, but he knew it was never his strong suit. Normally, when he was stuck in an awkward situation and he didn’t know how to make it better, he would rely on Mabel’s greater social ability to get him out of it. But, of course, this was _his_ date. Mabel wouldn't be here to rescue him. He knew he should be doing this on his own, but he decided instead to wait for Bill to carry the job of starting a conversation for the both of them.

After two minutes of painful silence, he cleared his throat and said something. “So...are you still embarrassed from Mabel walking in on us?”

Dipper smiled. “I mean...kind of? I guess it was going to happen eventually but I didn’t think it would be so soon.” He tucked his long hair behind his ear and continued speaking. “I mean, you know how I feel about people seeing us be intimate. I always hated PDA.”

Bill stared at the smaller man’s rosy cheeks and big, brown eyes. “I think it’s cute when you’re flustered,” he says, grinning wide. “I’ve always thought that.”

His compliment makes Dipper blush. Compliments don’t come often, and as a result, he’s not completely used to them. Not even Pacifica said something nice every so often. Looking back on their relationship, he wanted to slap himself for being so blind to her self-absorbedness. “Thanks. I mean, I’m _not,_ but thanks.”

Bill furrows his eyebrows. “The hell do you mean you’re not?” He sat up straighter and cleared his throat, and Dipper grinned. Bill did this a lot back when they dated in high school--he was about to launch into a long tangent about all the reasons why Dipper should love himself. Bill looked Dipper straight in the eye and began talking. “You’re the most adorable human being on the planet.”

“How? What’s so adorable about me?” Dipper pressured.

“Well, for one, you have the most adorable and kissable button nose I have ever seen.”

Dipper blushed at that. “I do not,” he mumbled in denial, opening the menu in some attempt to cover his face. Bill huffed, pushing the menu away from his face with his hand and leaning over the table to look at him. “You _so_ do, I’m looking at it, and it _is_ adorable.” He punctuated this with a small boop to the his nose, grinning at how flustered the brown-haired man became—though, he could make it a little worse. He still had plenty of things to say about his precious little Pine Tree, after all. He continued. “Not to mention your hair.”

“What about my hair?” Dipper asked a bit apprehensively, insecurity bleeding through his words. He knew his hair was a mess more often than not but he never really had the time—or willpower—to fix it.

Bill smiled at him. “It’s still as fluffy as I remember,” he chuckled a bit, “Kinda like a sheep, actually.”

“I am not a sheep.”

“I didn’t say that!” Bill had to keep from laughing as he recalled an old memory. “Would you prefer I compare it to a lamby-lamby instead?”

“Oh my god!” Dipper groaned loudly as the memory came back in vivid detail. It was an accident, but once, Bill had asked about a photo they had laying around their house. Mabel was quick to show him just where it came from and Dipper wanted to die on spot. “I was hoping you’d forget about that.”

Bill was on the verge of cackling. He couldn’t help it. Dipper’s face was as red as a tomato at this point, and it was absolutely adorable how embarrassed he got. “I’m sorry, _darling_ , I'd never forget something as cute as that.”

“Pet names will get you _nowhere_ , Cipher,” he shot back weakly, trying to ignore the warmth in his chest that came from hearing that.

Bill grinned in response. “Well, I wouldn’t know about that. It's gotten me this far, hasn’t it?” he quips. “And if I remember correctly, you used to love my pet names for you.”

“ _Used to_ is right, you sound like a lovesick moron.”

“Maybe I am a lovesick moron _for you.”_

Dipper cringed with amusement. “Oh my God, quit being cheesy!”

“Never! In fact, I’ll keep _worshipping_ you with pet names and compliments until the day I die because _you deserve the world_ and so much more and I—” He took Dipper’s hand and pressed a kiss to his knuckles. “—would do my best to give it to you.”

Dipper was at a loss for words. Never in seven years had he heard something so profound and filled with nothing but pure love and adoration. He knew they were playing around, but he still wasn’t sure how to respond to it.

They were only snapped out of the moment by the waiter who cleared his throat, giving a pointed glance at the PDA before him. The glance was full of disgust, making Dipper uncomfortable and Bill bristle. “I’m sorry, but could you please not make such a scene? It’s very distracting to our other customers,” he said with a fake sense of politeness which seemed very forced.

Dipper bit his lip, wanting to retract his hand. He couldn't, as it was kept in place by Bill, who seemed very annoyed at this person. “Really? How so?” he asked with the same fake tone the waiter used. The waiter was clearly taken aback by the attitude and didn’t like it.

“Well, you should know that public displays of affection are very distracting, especially in a dining place such as this. It’s very unprofessional and I’d like to ask you to keep that to a minimum.”

“Well, maybe you should tell that to _that_ couple over there,” Bill said, voice growing sassier as he pointed to a table with a heterosexual couple sitting incredibly close to each other, kissing each other on the noses and giggling. “How come you didn’t tell _them_ the same thing?”

The waiter hesitated for a moment. “I already did,” he stated simply. “Now, this doesn’t have to be a big deal--”

The waiter was cut off by Bill standing up out of his seat and boldly walking over to the straight couple at the table. He politely smiled at them and said, “Hi, sorry to interrupt you. Did that waiter over there--” he pauses for a short moment to point at him-- “ever tell you to stop your public display of affection?”

The couple seemed unnerved by how suddenly they were accosted by this strange, blond man. “N-no,” the woman stammered, glancing at her male partner.

Bill wore a big smile on his face. “Oh! How _interesting,_ because THAT waiter just told my boyfriend--” Bill still wasn’t sure if he could call Dipper his boyfriend yet, but he couldn’t find a more appropriate word, so he decided to roll with it. “--to stop _our_ PDA, even though it was pretty clear we weren’t bothering anybody. I mean, did _you_ see anyone get upset at us, did you?”

The woman furrowed her eyebrows, seemingly in disgust. “No, I didn’t.”

“Yeah, of course you fuckin’ didn’t,” Bill spat, not caring about whether or not the straight couple minded his vulgar language, “because _you’re_ heterosexual.” Bill walked back over to his table with Dipper, his gaze still locked on the couple. “And _we’re_ not.”

Dipper began to feel nauseous as Bill continued talking. “We’ve been through _a lot_ today, okay? I had to crash his wedding because he was about to marry a whore, and he had to forgive me for some terrible shit that I could tell wasn't easy for him. And we're here tonight just to have a pleasant, peaceful dinner. And you're fucking ruining that, so why don't you get your _homophobic bitch-ass_ the hell out of here and get us a waiter that actually _wants_ to take our goddamn order?!” Bill sat back down as he gave a dirty look to the homophobe before him. He exhaled, letting out a shaky breath as he smoothed out how wrinkled shirt. The waiter walked off without another word, leaving the customers all around them stunned.

By the time Bill had finished talking, Dipper was mortified for several reasons. First, Bill had just used _very vulgar language_ in front of everyone. Second, he called him his boyfriend; he knew they'd shared that intimate moment in the hallway, but…he wasn't sure if he was okay with the title yet. And third, this _homophobic bitch-ass_ (in Bill's words) completely destroyed his self-esteem. The nostalgia he got was painful. Suppressed memories came flooding back, and it was too much.

Before Bill could say anything else, Dipper stood up and ran for the exits of the restaurant, ignoring Bill's panicked shouts of “PINE TREE!” and ran back to Bill's car, crying into his hands, wanting to hide from the world forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...yeah.
> 
> The next chapter will hopefully be much longer, and so will the grand finale on Christmas Eve.
> 
> Oh, and the epilogue on Christmas Day. That should be long, hopefully. Dunno, we're not sure what it'll be yet.


	23. 10:00 PM - Suppressed Memory

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY!  
> This is the last chapter before the finale & epilogue (sob). This has been a really fun ride, and as far as we're concerned, a big success. Thank you to EVERYONE who's taken the time to leave kudos and comment regularly. You guys are our heroes.

#  **10:00 PM - Suppressed Memory**

Bill didn’t know what he’d done wrong.

He ran after Dipper when he realized he was on the verge of tears. Bill saw Dipper climb into the passenger seat of his car. He knocked on the window, hoping Dipper would roll it down. “Pine Tree?” he asked, concern and worry coating his words. “What’s wrong? Did I do something?”

Dipper didn’t have enough mental energy left to roll his eyes at him. Of _course_ , he’d done something, but that’s not what he was crying about. He simply gestured for him to enter the car with his arm instead of speaking. Bill quickly obliged and got in the driver’s seat next to Dipper and pulled him close to his chest. “What’s wrong, sweetheart?”

Dipper sniffed, trying to stop all the tears from flowing due to his embarrassment. Wiping his face, he said, “It’s nothing you did, it’s just...some _repressed memories_ came back really, really quickly and I had to leave.” The smaller man refused to look at Bill, averting his gaze. He wanted the earth to swallow him whole.

Bill’s heart felt like it had just been stabbed. He knew exactly what Dipper was talking about. “It’s all the homophobia we had to face, wasn’t it?”

Dipper nodded. “Yeah.” Back when they dated seven years ago, not too many people were very friendly to the gay community, and this toxic ideology bit Bill and Dipper in the ass when they went public as a couple. When Dipper came out, it was as if he’d lost half of his friends in an instant. Almost everyone that loved him suddenly hated him overnight, and it was incredibly difficult to go through. The same thing happened to Bill (obviously), but they promised each other they wouldn't let it get to them. They would go out on dates and be yelled at by homophobes. They’d kiss in the hallways of their schools and have books and papers thrown at them. Homophobia was everywhere, and they did their best to evade it.

But then they broke up, and Dipper started dating Pacifica, and all of a sudden, the hate had gone away. Of course, some of it still lingered (mostly from ignoramuses that couldn’t grasp the concept of bisexuality), but because Pacifica and Dipper were a straight couple, he didn’t have to face nearly as much hate. Due to all the pain and suffering that came with having a boyfriend instead of a girlfriend, Dipper pushed those memories to the back of his subconscious, trying to enjoy his new heterosexual relationship with a woman he _thought_ was wonderful at the time.

In the time since Dipper graduated high school, he surrounded himself with close friends and family, and none of them were against the idea of same-sex romance, so he knew that if he and Pacifica didn’t work out for whatever reason, and he began dating a guy, that they would be fine with that. And in the hours following the wedding crash and the small romance that blossomed between him and Bill, it _was_ fine. Because they hadn’t gone out in public acting as a couple yet.

Dipper grabbed onto Bill’s shirt tightly, trying to control his breathing. “I just _forgot_ how much hate we used to face ever since I was in a relationship with a woman,” Dipper explained. “I suppressed those memories, and when the homophobic waiter came to us, it all came rushing back and I--” He cuts himself off, trying to prevent a choked sob. “--couldn’t take it.”

Bill pressed a soft kiss to the top of his head, caressing Dipper’s cheek with his hand. “Pine Tree,” he whispered, “You shouldn’t let those dumbasses get to you. Remember, we promised each other all those years ago, that we would never let the hate get in the way of our relationship?”

Dipper nodded wordlessly.

“Do you think that promise still stands? ‘Cause I do,” Bill says, gently raking his nails in Dipper’s hair. He could see his Pine Tree was beginning to relax.

“Yeah,” Dipper mutters. “I-I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault,” Bill whispered as he ran his hand across Dipper’s back. “Do you want to get dinner somewhere else?” The purpose of this whole dinner was so that Bill and Dipper could bond as...boyfriends? Partners? Friends-with-benefits? Both men still weren’t sure of where their relationship stood.

Dipper sighed, getting off of Bill’s body and sitting back down in the passenger seat. “I...might have an idea. It’s not dinner, but it’s better. At least, I hope you think so.” Dipper wasn’t totally sure if Bill was going to like it--especially given the unknown state of their platonic/romantic relationship--but he knew there were much worse ideas.

Bill put the keys in the ignition and started up the engine. “Tell me where we’re going.” He was eager to hear where his Pine Tree wanted to go after this train wreck of a dinner.

Dipper wiped more of the moisture from his eyes and put on his seatbelt. “Do you remember that park that we used to go to when we were dating? We used to go every weekend, and you’d sneak out of your house, and you’d pick me up, and we’d eat whatever we can find at the convenience store? Then we’d get a blanket and stargaze?”

Bill nodded. “Of course. Something like that is hard to forget, especially with you.”

Dipper blushed again, the anxiety and pain of what had just happened in the restaurant finally beginning to fade. It was in the past--the very _recent_ past, but it still wasn’t the present. “I’d like to go there with you.”

Bill couldn’t have driven fast enough. As they traveled down the streets of Gravity Falls, they listened to an eclectic and nostalgic playlist that reminded them of their time together as teenagers. About five minutes into the ride, Dipper was suddenly reminded of one of the things that was nagging at the back of his mind. “Hey Bill, can I ask you something?” he said.

Bill turned the volume knob to the left so he could more easily hear him. “Of course.”

Dipper fidgeted with his hair anxiously. “When you were talking to that straight couple in the restaurant, and she told you that he’d never told them to stop their PDA, you--”

Bill interrupted him. “I used the word ‘boyfriend.’ That must be bothering you, right?”

He exhaled. “Yeah. And I didn’t know...why you said it.”

“I had to think of a word quickly to describe our relationship, and I knew that ‘boyfriend’ wasn’t totally accurate because...I don’t think either of us know where this relationship stands right now. But I couldn’t think of anything else, so I just used it as a simplification.”

“Oh, okay.” Dipper felt somewhat relieved at his words. “‘Cause I didn’t know if you thought that we were...boyfriends, or if you just used that word without really meaning it.”

Bill thought for a moment. “Where _does_ our relationship stand?” He figured now would be as good a time as any to get the answer to that question.

Dipper paused. “I dunno. I mean, we’ve kissed, and we seemed pretty happy with each other back in the restaurant before that whole thing happened.”

“And I happen to love you,” Bill added, grabbing Dipper’s left hand and squeezing it tight. “I know it’s still a little early, and you don’t have to answer this if you don’t want to, but do you love me?”

Dipper stared thoughtfully at Bill for a moment. He wasn’t completely sure he was ready to say yes--

\--until something occurred to him.

The waiter at the restaurant had made Bill feel uncomfortable and discriminated against, and Bill stood up and willingly defended him against the homophobia, making a very public scene in the restaurant. Seven years ago, he had done just the opposite.

_Bill has really changed._

Instead of succumbing to the hate and leaving him again, when faced with the same dilemma--in the same environment--Bill had a different reaction than he did as a teenager. Only someone that _truly cared_ about him and wanted to be with him would recognize the opportunity to repeat a mistake and _not_ take it.

“Yes.” The word left Dipper’s mouth quickly and quietly, and Bill seemed a little surprised, like he didn’t expect him to answer so fast.

“Really? ‘Cause if you need more time to think about it--”

“I already thought about it,” Dipper says. “Instead of making the same mistake twice, you actually defended me and stood your ground. Seven years ago, when you were faced with the same problem, you had a different response. You’ve really changed, and that means...you really love me. And you won’t hurt me.”

Bill smiled, internally screaming at himself not to cry. He’d finally _redeemed_ himself. Dipper finally saw that Bill had no intention to ever hurt him again, no, on the contrary, he wanted to give him everything and protect him from all the pain that he knew he couldn’t deal with on his own. “Yeah,” he said simply. “I do love you.”

“I love you, too,” Dipper said.

His grip tightened a bit on the steering wheel upon hearing those words. Bill wasn’t sure how he was able to keep it together. It was like the void in his heart was filled. What he’d lost all those years ago--while still incredibly new to them both--was back, and he couldn’t help but feel overjoyed. “If I weren’t driving this car, I’d kiss you so much right now,” he said honestly, not caring that it sounded corny as fuck. He smiled once he heard Dipper laugh. It was that same kind of giggly laughter he’d heard all those years ago, and it made his chest warm.

It wasn’t long before they reached the park. Just being here gave them both memories from all those years ago, when they didn’t have nearly as many responsibilities and worries. It used to be just them, ignoring the naysayers that said homosexuality was wrong and guaranteed eternal damnation. They were young teenagers in love; they didn’t want to listen to anyone else.

It was dark out now, the area only lit by the street lamps here. The light reflected on the snow, making it appear brighter than it actually was.

Bill stopped the car and glanced over at the brown-haired man beside him staring mesmerized out the window. He wanted to laugh at that look on his face but he bit back his laughter, only to snap Dipper out of his thoughts. “You wanna head out there?”

Dipper blushed, slightly embarrassed he zoned out like that and nodded. “Yeah.”

With the clicks of seatbelts being unbuckled, they headed out of the car. It was a lot colder outside now since it was so late, but it wasn’t anything he wasn’t used to by now. Still, Dipper couldn’t help but shiver--not only because of the cold, but the wave of nostalgia that washed over him at that moment. Memories of just being adolescents and ideal dreams and fantasies of the future, of things they’d do when they were older, of mapping out the stars above them, trying to spot any constellations, cheesy moments that he’d think about long after Bill had gone home, and eating junk food that was too sugar-packed for their own good.

A warm hand took his cold one, lacing their fingers together and he looked up at Bill. The blonde smiled down at him a bit and asked, “Are you remembering all the things we used to do here, too?”

Dipper nodded. “Yeah.” He held his hand a bit tighter. Now that he had a moment to just think, he realized something. “So much changed since then.”

Bill couldn’t help but chuckle a bit. “Kind of, yeah,” he agreed. Dipper was right, a lot of things _had_ changed over the years. “Wanna know what hasn’t changed?”

Dipper knew Bill well; he would most definitely take this opportunity to make a sex joke. He shot him a flat look. “If you’re going to say ‘your dick’, I’m leaving.”

“Well, I wasn’t expecting you to be so forward, but I’m sorry that changed too.”

“ _Oh my god,_ ” Dipper groaned with amusement, trying to turn around. “I’m leaving.”

Bill laughed, nearly doubling over as he tried to keep his hold on Dipper who was trying to break out of the handhold. “No, honey, come back. That wasn’t even what I was going to say.”

“No, you lost your chance for making such a bad joke,” Dipper said as he finally broke free and started walking back to the car. That was honestly awful, and he hated that he thought it was funny.

“You brought it up!” Bill yelled in his defense as he tried to catch up to the shorter man. He would have been worried he messed things up again but he couldn’t be when he saw traces of a small smile forming on Dipper’s lips. “Come on, you’re laughing. I can see you’re trying not to laugh.”

Dipper grinned. “Doesn’t change the fact you’re awful.”

“But you love me.”

“I do. But you’re still awful.”

“I’m very aware of that, sweetheart,” Bill responded as he kissed the back of Dipper’s hand. “But the point is, you love me.” Bill pulls Dipper close and presses a soft kiss to his forehead, right where his birthmark is.

Dipper wraps his arms around Bill, sinking into the hug. “Yeah. I do.”


	24. 11:00 PM - I Love You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO!  
> Yeah...we missed a day.  
> We're sorry. We were very busy and I write very slowly. Midnight came too quickly.  
> I _did_ stay up until 2:30 am writing this, but I didn't get much done. I hope the NSFW at the end of the chapter makes up for that. You could say this fanfic is going out with a _bang_. 
> 
> And yes, this is the end.  
> I can confirm this chapter is basically nothing but fluff and sex, so grab your hot chocolate and popcorn! Since this is the last chapter, it's pretty bittersweet for Vii and I, and we'd like to thank every single one of our readers that took the time to comment and support us throughout December. May your 2019 be filled with lots of happiness and Billdip NSFW.
> 
> If you ever want to contact me, my Discord tag is normally Alejandro#9208 (though, for the holidays, there are a bunch of emojis in it: 🎁🎅🌟Alejandro🌲🎄⛄#9208). Feel free to send me a message if you want to talk at all! You can also follow me on Twitter and DM me or tweet at me! I'll always be happy to talk to you! Please don't think you're bothering me; you never are.
> 
> Hope you enjoy the sex! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

#  **11:00 PM - I Love You**

Hand in hand, Bill led Dipper through the park to their favorite spot to stargaze and forget about the world around them. It had been an incredibly long time since they were both here at the same time. Nostalgia washed over them as they walked through the grass.

Dipper couldn’t bring himself to come here in the first few years after he’d broken things off with Bill due to the horrible misunderstanding and heartbreak. He didn’t want to think about Bill or surround himself with those past memories. He wanted to get rid of anything that made him think about Bill, yet he always found himself coming back to the park, following the path out of habit only to turn back before reaching the end. He was afraid he might see Bill there, just waiting for him. Dipper was scared of dealing with any of the emotions that came with seeing his ex-lover in the small spot they used to spend so much time in together. He didn’t want to taint those memories, nor did he want to face them.

If anyone had told him he’d be coming back to this place with the man that broke his heart all those years ago, he honestly wouldn’t have believed them. He’d roll his eyes and move on, continuing to pretend like he wasn’t thinking about it.

Despite everything, Dipper was happy the day had ended the way they had now. He may not be getting married, but he had the love of his life back and that was all that mattered to him now.

“I missed that smile,” Bill said softly, snapping him out of his thoughts. “What are you thinking about?”

Dipper wasn’t even aware he was smiling just then since he’d zoned out so much. “Oh, nothing. Just how much I missed being here.” He bit his lip before adding, “And how much I missed you.”

Bill couldn’t describe the warmth he felt in his chest upon hearing that. _God, he wanted to sweep the boy off his feet and smother him_ . Instead, he smirked. “ _Now_ who’s being cheesy?”

“You’ve been cheesy all night. I’m allowed to be at least a little cheesy,” Dipper responded cheekily.

Bill chuckled; he couldn’t argue with that. “Alright, alright you got me there. We’re here, by the way.”

Dipper looked up and noticed the place looked just about the same as it did when they were teenagers, save for the snow coating the small hill. The emptiness he felt being near here before was nowhere to be found; it was replaced with a sense of comfort that felt like the emotion he’d experienced all those years ago.

The hand holding his let go and he looked over at Bill, only to find him unbuttoning his jacket. “What are you doing?”

“I forgot to bring a blanket, so we’re using my jacket.”

“Oh my God! Bill, put your jacket back on! It’s cold!” Not to mention it was _snowing_. On Christmas Eve! “You’re going to freeze. You could get a cold, y’know!”

Bill wasn’t phased by this as he shrugged off his jacket and laid it down on the hill, sitting down on it. “Well, it’s a good thing I have your love to keep me warm tonight.” He gave him a wink and grinned, patting the empty spot beside him.

Dipper gave the other an incredulous look and snorted with amusement. “You’re an idiot.”

Bill hummed in response, loving the blush that settled on the other’s cheeks. “We already established that, honey. Don’t keep me waiting.”

Dipper rolled his eyes at the other’s ridiculousness but took a seat beside him anyway. There wasn’t much space on his jacket, but it wasn’t bad by any means. On the contrary, it was actually pretty nice and gave them an excuse to snuggle closer to each other--not that they needed one. Bill wrapped an arm around him just like he used to and Dipper rested his head on the other’s shoulder. It was something they’d do on colder nights to keep warm and Bill was still as warm as Dipper remembered.

It was quiet. There was no one around but them, and they were both grateful for that. It was a comfortable silence, the kind you’d find in a quiet library.

“The sky’s clear tonight,” Dipper pointed out in a small murmur, breaking the silence as he looked up. Millions of stars decorated the otherwise pitch black sky. It was mesmerizing. “The stars are beautiful tonight.”

“Yeah,” Bill agreed quietly, equally amazed by the view. It was beautiful and never ceased to make him feel so small. After all, there was so much out there, an endless stream of stars. In the grand scheme of the universe, he was insignificant, but he was okay with that. He smiled as he nuzzled Dipper’s hair. “Not as beautiful as you.”

Dipper blushed at that. “There’s thousands of stars out there, Bill. You can’t possibly think that.” He wasn’t anything special, after all.

Bill seemed dead set on proving him wrong as he huffed, “I definitely can.” He shifted a bit so he was now on his side, facing Dipper. He was a bit taken aback by the sudden seriousness Bill displayed. “You outshine every one of the stars out here tonight, including the damn sun.” He tucked a stray strand of Dipper’s hair behind his ear and continued. “You’re beautiful, sexy, and handsome in every single possible way, shape and form. I’ve waited to tell you that for so long.” He pressed his forehead against his. “And I won’t stand by and hear you think anything else, Pine Tree.”

Albeit Dipper still wasn’t used to hearing such compliments directed towards him, hearing them now made his heart warm and lit his face on fire, something he hadn’t felt before with anyone else. And now, with Bill being so close to him, he wasn’t sure how to respond. Unsure how to say what he felt, he decided to let actions speak for themselves and pulled the other into another kiss. It was soft, gentle and timid and wordlessly communicated a “thank you” to the blond man.

Bill accepted the kiss, capturing his lips in a quick motion. Kissing his Pine Tree was something he adored and missed doing more than he would have liked to admit. When Dipper cupped his cheeks, he allowed himself to get lost in the taste of his lips and the feeling of his palms on his skin. They pulled away to catch their breath, which was visible in the cold air. “I love you,” Dipper whispered quietly, a soft smile on his lips.

Bill’s heart swelled. _He remembered that smile._ “I love you, too.” He pulled him closer and pressed a small kiss to the other’s forehead birthmark. “Thank you for giving me a second chance.”

Dipper blushed, humming softly. “No problem,” he said a bit awkwardly. He was always at a loss for words when Bill kissed his birthmark, not to mention the flood of warm memories that came brushing past when he did.

After a short moment, he couldn’t help but notice Bill was shivering. “We should probably get going.”

“Already?” Bill was surprised. “I thought you wanted to spend some time here.”

“Bill, you’re freezing. I don’t want you getting a cold or something.” He got off Bill’s makeshift blanket and stood back up. “We can come here some other time. Come on, put your jacket back on.”

“Fine, fine.” He rolled his eyes. Bill was pretty sure wouldn’t get sick from being in the cold for a while, but he did appreciate his Pine Tree’s concern. That was the only reason he decided to heed the kid’s warning.

As he shook his jacket out, his attention was caught by a bright flash in the sky. “Dipper, look! A shooting star!”

Dipper looked up, just barely catching sight of it. “I see it. Are you going to make a wish?”

He thought for a moment. “No, my wish was already granted by a different shooting star.” He could see Dipper roll his eyes at the small pun, though he took pride in it anyways. “What about you?”

“Me?” Dipper asked, a bit surprised.

Bill nodded. “Yeah! Don’t you have anything you want to wish for?”

Dipper paused. “Maybe a trip to the convenience store, just like we used to?” His stomach rumbled and he smiled sheepishly. “I’m hungry.”

Bill internally whined. Dipper was adorable but he couldn’t help but tease him. “Wishes don’t come true if you say them out loud, Pine Tree.” He tsked at him playfully as he slid his jacket back on and walked over to him. “Though, for someone as cute as you are, I’ll make an exception.”

“I’m not cute.” Dipper took the other’s hand and laced their fingers together. “But thanks.”

He almost laughed at how offended Bill looked at his response. “Do I have to tell you how cute you are all over again?”

“Please, no. I don’t know how to process compliments.”

“As you wish.” Bill smiled at Dipper as he climbed into the passenger seat, eagerly awaiting to arrive at the store. Even though he didn’t want to hear it, Bill wanted to tell Dipper how cute he looked, sitting in that seat with a big smile on his face.

* * *

 

The ride to the store was pretty nice, and it wasn’t too far away, either. It was actually within walking distance, but Dipper didn’t want to risk Bill getting a cold by spending more time outside, even if he did have a jacket on.

Once they were in the store, Dipper couldn’t help but think about all the times they used to spend messing around in the aisles and loading up on snacks and sweets, spending an unreasonable amount of money--typically almost their entire paychecks from their jobs. Speaking of sweets, he may or may not have picked up a hefty amount of chocolate while Bill was in the other aisle trying to find whatever it was he wanted.

“You still have the worst sweet tooth, don’t you?” came a voice behind him. He turned around and was both surprised and amused by the familiar packet in Bill’s hands.

“It’s better than those awful Peeps, you _ass_ ,” Dipper sassed with a grin.

“ _Peeps are underappreciated_ ,” Bill insisted sternly. He didn’t understand why Dipper always thought they were so gross.

“They’re repulsive,” Dipper said, making a face to match his disgust.

Bill raised an eyebrow, enjoying this playful and sassy attitude coming from Dipper. “Excuse you! Tell that to the candy corn _trash_ you enjoy.”

“Hey, candy corn is good!” Granted, there were many better choices, but it wasn’t that bad by any means.

Bill hummed in disagreement. “ _Trash._ ”

Dipper playfully shoved him. “ _You’re_ trash.”

“I’m quality trash,” Bill clarified. “I'm a recycling bin filled with flowers.”

Dipper snorted. “Can't really argue with that one.”

Bill grinned. “Alright, hold these for me.” He carefully handed the box of Peeps him. “Pitt Cola, right?”

“Yes, please,” he said, taking the box. With that, Bill was off with a small “I’ll be back”. He looked down at the box of nasty treats Bill wanted to get himself. Dipper still couldn’t understand how Bill liked these things; they tasted like a slushie concentrated three times over.

After their brief trip to the convenience store, Dipper and Bill headed for Dipper's house, telling themselves they'd call Mabel tomorrow morning and fill her in on what happened. Both men set their things down on Dipper's dining table.

Dipper was completely exhausted. So much had happened in the past 24 hours, it was insane. He started this day trying to convince himself to love the woman he was about to marry, and now he was going to spend it in the arms of his ex-boyfriend. Funny how life works out sometimes. “Do you want to eat the food now or do something else first?” Dipper pulled off his coat and felt a strong urge to change clothes. He'd barely been able to all day.

Bill embraced him, wrapping his arms around Dipper's small frame and holding him close. “I want to spend some silent time with you, just us. Maybe think about what the hell just happened today.”

Dipper chuckled. “Yeah, this was the weirdest day of my life.” He glanced at his bedroom door. “Do you want to go to my room?”

“Of course,” Bill says, eager to get cozy with him under the bedsheets. His willingness to show this much physical and emotional affection in such a short amount of time was nothing short of a miracle.

Maybe Christmas really was a magical time of year.

Dipper led Bill into his bedroom and closed the door, suddenly insecure. He didn't know if it would be okay to... _undress_ in front of him like this. He wanted to change into something more comfortable, but Bill was standing right there.

Bill seemed to notice his internal conflict. He put his hand on the doorknob and said, “Do you want me to leave so you can change?”

He sighed in relief. “Yeah.” Dipper would've been lying if he said he wasn't waiting for Bill to say it.

“Okay.” He left the room, closing the door behind him. More relaxed now, Dipper unbuttoned his shirt and discarded his pants, opting for more comfortable clothing: basketball shorts and an oversized T-shirt.

He opened his door again to let Bill in, only to realize an obvious problem—Bill didn't have a change of clothes, either. Bill noticed this too, as he grinned and murmured, “Do you want me to take my clothes off?”

Dipper stammered. He didn't want to appear thirsty or desperate, so he muttered a simple response as he sat on his bed. “Sure, if you want to.”

Bill smiled. His Pine Tree was shy and embarrassed again, and he was going to cherish this. He unbuttoned his shirt quickly and discarded it on the floor, then unbuckled his pants and also let those fall to the ground. Dipper blushes furiously and looks down at his lap, trying not to look at Bill’s nearly-naked body as much as he wanted to. Once he was undressed, he sat on Dipper’s bed next to him,. Gently placing his hand on the back of Dipper’s head, Bill pulled his lips to his and kissed him softly.

When they broke apart, Dipper felt himself wanting more. He wrapped his arms around his torso and buried his face in the crook of his neck, wanting nothing more than to stay here like this forever and drown himself in the blond man’s warmth. He couldn’t believe he was in bed with Bill, of all people, like this. A small part of him wanted to see if he could take this any further.

Bill whispers something that interrupts Dipper’s train of thought. “I’ve been waiting to hold you like this for forever. I know I’ve already said that, but I don’t think you get how much this means to me.”

Dipper’s hands greedily run down Bill’s back, wanting to feel his skin as much as he could. “I know,” he whispered as he continued to trace his spine with his fingernail. he also missed being held by Bill like this. To be able to do this and.. that stray thought came back to mind that had him biting his lip. He wasn’t sure if he should say it out loud but.. “Maybe you could... _show me?”_

Bill paused. “...What?” He pulled away just enough to look at the smaller man in his arms, unsure if he heard him correctly or if he was just imagining things. Having Bill’s full attention on him, he felt his own confidence waver, but he was incredibly desperate but he wanted to see just how far this could go.

Dipper took a deep breath and looked him in the eye. “Show me how much this means to you.”

Bill ran a finger along Dipper’s jawline. “Are you sure? That you’re ready...for _this?”_

Dipper hesitated. _Maybe this was a bit too soon._ After all, they’d only been “together” for a few short hours--and despite the conversation they’d had in the car--he was still unsure if they were boyfriends or not. He was probably being irrational, and it would probably be better to let this level of intimacy wait.

But at the same time, he didn’t care. He wanted Bill to show him how much he loved him. “Yeah. I’m sure.”

The blond man felt his heart begin to race. Just this morning, Bill thought that there was no possible way they could be together and that he was just a burden on the world. He absolutely never would’ve guessed they’d be where they are right now.

Bill’s right hand sneaks up Dipper’s shirt, resting on his abdomen and gently pushing him down onto the mattress as he straddled him. “Okay, then, my love.” He leans down and presses a kiss to the tip of his nose, looking at Dipper with a unique cross between lust and love in his eyes. “I’ll show you.”

Dipper exhaled softly. He couldn’t believe they were about to do this. It felt like his first time all over again, being able to show the highest level of intimacy to his true love. Dipper arms wrapped around Bill’s torso and pulled him closer; he froze up when he felt the bulge in Bill’s underwear briefly brush over his groin.

Bill’s breath became shaky as his other hand slid up Dipper’s shirt, pulling it over his head. His hands roamed freely across Dipper’s toned torso, soaking in the feeling of his soft, smooth skin that he missed _so fucking much._ Bill began biting and kissing Dipper’s neck, only to quickly move down to his chest. Dipper gasps at the sensation of Bill’s mouth against his cold skin; it was intoxicating, and his thought process became blurry as he relished in this amazing feeling.

Bill continued moving lower, leaving a trail of bite marks along his body. Once he arrived at Dipper’s waist, he looked up at him, tapping the hem of his basketball shorts. “Can I take these off?”

Dipper nods tentatively. “Yeah.” He thought that asking for consent like this was _incredibly sexy,_ and it even made his member harden a little.

Bill’s fingers sneak under the basketball shorts and Dipper’s boxers and slowly drag them down to his knees, allowing his boner to spring free. It was much longer than it was seven years ago, and was already leaking a bit of precum. Dipper’s breath caught in his throat, and he closed his eyes, afraid that Bill might not like what he sees.

The blond man was shocked at how much he’d grown; he estimated that Dipper must be about six inches long by now. “God _damn,_ ” Bill muttered under his breath. “You’ve gotten bigger.”

Dipper let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. “T--thanks,” he breathed awkwardly.

Bill grinned as he wrapped his hand around the shaft and began stroking, eliciting delicious moans of pleasure from Dipper. He snickered. “You like that, don’t you, Pine Tree?” he asked him in a low, husky voice.

Dipper let out a whimper. He’d forgotten how much he loved it when Bill jerked him off. He whispered a “yeah” but it came out more like a shaky breath; he couldn’t think straight when he was being pleasured like this. “I--I fucking love thi-- _nnghh--”_

Dipper’s speech was cut off when Bill takes his cock in his mouth, swirling his tongue around it and sucking, moving his mouth up and down. Dipper lets out a startled groan at the ecstacy that overcame him. He couldn’t believe he wanted to go the rest of his life without this. He’d never felt this level of satisfaction and pleasure with Pacifica--none of their nights together ever came _close_ to what he was feeling right now. “Don’t stop,” he pleads. “That f--feels so fucking _good.”_

Bill looked up at him and gave him a wink, content with how he was making him feel. He couldn’t get enough of the noises that were flooding out of him. Bill picks up the pace, sucking harder and bobbing his head up and down his penis faster. Dipper’s moans increase in volume, getting louder until he says something that’s barely coherent with his panting. “Bill, I thi-- _ahh--_ I think I’m gonna... _ahh_ \--”

He didn’t have enough time to finish his warning before Dipper came into Bill’s mouth, the warm semen coating the inside of his mouth, and it was _delicious._ Bill swallowed all of it while Dipper wasn’t looking; he knew that if Dipper had saw him do that, he would’ve groaned and said it was gross as hell (he always used to when they were dating). Bill licked his lips as he got back on his knees to look at his beautiful Pine Tree, lying on the mattress with his limbs out, clearly exhausted. His breathing was labored, his face was red, and he looked _unbelievably beautiful._

He pressed a kiss to his cheek. “Wow,” Dipper said as he was catching his breath again. “That was…”

“Amazing.” Bill finished his sentence as he ran his hand through Dipper’s hair. “You’re amazing, Pine Tree. I love you.” He hugged him tightly, not wanting to let go of this moment he knew would never come back.

“I love you too.” Dipper’s eyelids were beginning to droop, and he felt sleep was fast approaching. “Can’t believe I went seven years without that.”

He chuckled. “That’s not even a _fraction_ of how much I love you, sweetheart.”

Dipper playfully raised an eyebrow. “Do you want to show me more?”

“Of course,” Bill said eagerly, using his hand to touch himself slowly. “Anything specific you mean by that?”

Dipper’s face turned fire-truck red. Both men knew what he was talking about, but neither one wanted to say it out loud; they just wanted to _do_ it. Dipper sighed. “I...really want you to fuck me.”

Even though Bill already knew what he wanted, it was still surreal to hear him say it out loud. Bill straddled him again and put his hands on Dipper’s thighs, gently spreading his legs apart. Bill’s breath quickened as he pulled off his boxer shorts and lined himself up at his entrance, looking up at Dipper to make sure he was comfortable. “Are you sure you’re ready for this?” Bill asked him.

Dipper nodded. “Yeah. I really want this.”

Bill exhaled, still reeling from knowing that this was _real._ He _finally_ had his Pine Tree back, in his arms, belonging only to him. He couldn’t recall a time he felt happier.

Slowly albeit eagerly, Bill pushed the head of his dick inside Dipper’s ass, and both men immediately cried out in euphoria. Bill forgot what this felt like. He hadn’t been with anyone else since the break-up, so this intoxicating sensation felt nostalgically familiar yet completely foreign. He never wanted it to end.

He looked down at Dipper to make sure he wasn’t in any pain yet as he continued entering him, the pleasure only growing as each inch of Bill’s long member went inside him. _“Pine Tree,”_ he murmured, his voice bleeding disbelief. _“You’re so tight.”_

Dipper, completely out of control of his breathing, responded with nothing but a needy whine. Bill smiled as he pushed the rest of his penis inside him, all eight inches completely inside his Pine Tree. Dipper was now redder than he’d ever seen him before, panting, and whining, but Bill hadn’t ever seen a sight that was more beautiful. Bill began pulling out slowly, only to gently shove himself back inside him, eliciting a cry from Dipper’s lips. He fell into a pattern of moving in and out, in and out, in and out, accompanied by their moans of each other’s names and occasional whimpers and whines. Bill gradually sped up his thrusts, becoming drunk off the incredible sensation.

“Pine Tree,” he whispered huskily and breathlessly. “I’m gonna cum soon.”

Dipper responded through his whimpers. “M--me too.”

Bill quickened, pumping in and out of him even faster, making Dipper scream in pleasure. The sound alone was enough to drive Bill over the edge, emptying himself inside the other with a few more thrusts and Dipper following soon after, his semen landing on their stomachs.

Dipper was completely breathless, exhausted, and in disbelief. _Had he really just done that with Bill?_

Bill scooped Dipper into his arms, not bothering to clean the mess they’d made on his bed; truthfully, neither of them cared about it since they were both in their own world, alone and together. “You were _fucking incredible,_ Pine Tree,” Bill says as he kisses his birthmark. “I really, really love you. And I always will.”

Dipper’s eyelids were closing once again. He snuggled up next to him, wrapping his arms around his body and resting his head on his toned chest. “I really love you, too,” he whispers, pressing a kiss to his hot skin. “I’m so tired.”

Bill holds his Pine Tree close as he lies down on the bed and envelopes the both of them in his warm bedsheets. “Well, maybe we should get some sleep.”

Dipper sighed. “Yeah. That’d probably be a good idea.” He closed his eyes and kissed his cheek once again until a thought occurred to him. “What about the food we bought?”

Bill gently ran a thumb across Dipper’s face. “Don’t worry about that. It’ll be our breakfast tomorrow.”

He snickered. “Do you want me to do the Walk of Shame back to your house with you?”

Bill chuckled. “If I’m coming from _your_ house, it’s not the walk of shame. I’d be so proud to tell everyone you’re my boyfriend.”

Dipper smiled at his use of the word _boyfriend._ He was finally comfortable with it now, and found it appropriate. “I’d like that a lot.”

“I would too.” Bill stared into Dipper’s big, brown eyes and kissed both his eyelids. “Goodnight, my love.”

Dipper rested his head against the pillow and snuggled up closer to him again. “Goodnight.”

The two men fell asleep in each other’s arms as the clock finally struck midnight, ending the best--and most chaotic--day of both of their lives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We love you for reading this far, especially if you've been following this fic from the beginning. Your comments and kudos are greatly appreciated, and we can't thank you enough. <3
> 
> Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!


	25. December 25, One Year Later

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey.
> 
> So, this really is it. We're so thankful that you've come on this crazy ride with us, and it's been a lot of fun.  
> Here's my way of closing out the new year: gay romance.
> 
> Hope you all enjoy! ,3

#  **One Year Later: December 25**

Life was good.

Ever since the night Bill and Dipper finally made up and became boyfriends, they were inseparable. Not even Mabel had ever seen two people more in love. When they moved in together and began spending much more time together, she noticed the little things about how they interacted, like how a slight blush tints Dipper’s cheeks whenever Bill’s shoulder brushes past his, or the lovesick look Bill has whenever he admires his boyfriend. It was endearing, and Mabel seemed to never get enough of their cuteness.

Which is why she completely lost her shit when Bill called her, saying that he wanted to marry him.

She was screaming and jumping up and down, unable to contain her excitement. She had been dreaming about her brother’s wedding day for so long, thinking about how she would organize everything and it would be perfect, and not a single interruption would happen.  _ Everything _ would go perfectly, since they were the perfect couple.

Bill held the phone away from his ear so he didn’t damage his hearing.  _ Jesus, _ this woman’s scream should only be heard by dogs. “Calm the hell down, Mabel,” Bill chuckled in only slight annoyance. He began wondering if this was really the smartest idea, telling Mabel about this when she would so obviously want to tell Dipper right away.

After an additional minute of jumping and squealing, she finally regained her sanity--in some form--and began asking him so many questions, he felt like he was being interrogated. “How are you going to do it? Are you going to buy a ring? Does anyone else know? Where are you going to have the wedding?”

“Whoa, whoa, slow down!” Bill barely knew where to get an engagement ring, and he  _ definitely _ didn’t know how to find a place to have a wedding. Mabel was clearly more well-versed in this world of marriage than he was—even though she had never been in a romantic relationship. “I have a ring, and I know how I’m gonna propose, but that’s it.”

Mabel gasps. “You should put it under the tree and have him open it on Christmas morning!”

“That’s exactly what I was thinking,” Bill says with a smile. “And you  _ better not _ say anything about this to Dipper!” He knew how much of a blabbermouth Mabel could be, and he didn’t need Mabel’s talkativeness to spoil the surprise of his life.

“Of  _ course _ not! Do you think I’m some sort of bitch?!” Mabel sounded offended, but it was also clear that she wasn’t actually upset.

Bill chuckled. He decided he might be able to trust her this time.

* * *

 

Christmas Day came quickly, and Bill found himself feeling extremely anxious. There were a million things that could go wrong, and Dipper could easily say no. Bill’s stress built up as the hours went by, and he ended up getting no sleep, unlike his boyfriend. Dipper slept soundly, curled up in his arms, probably dreaming about whatever nerdy cryptography book he was reading at the moment. Bill was shaking as he held him, trying to calm himself down by syncing his breathing patterns with Dipper’s to no avail. Eventually, he gave up trying to get sleep and watched YouTube videos until the sun came up.

Dipper woke up at around 6:00, as he usually did, and was surprised to find Bill wide awake, staring at his phone. He wrapped an arm around him and pressed a kiss to his bare chest. “Hi, love.”

Bill took out his earbuds and put his phone down, kissing his Pine Tree on the top of his head. “Hi.” He tried to calm himself down— _ God, why did he have to shake so fucking much— _ and focused on his scent rather than the impending best/worst day of his life, depending on how things went. “It’s Christmas morning, we should sleep in.”

Despite what Bill had just said, Dipper got out of bed and pulled on a shirt and a pair of basketball shorts. “Everyone’s coming at 8:00, so I dunno if that’s the greatest idea. Besides, I’m hungry.” Dipper exited their bedroom and made his way into the kitchenette of their small apartment. Bill groaned and reluctantly got out of bed, put on a pair of sweatpants, and followed him.

As he stepped out of the bedroom and into the hallway, the Christmas tree became easily visible, and he could see the tiny red gift box he’d put the engagement ring in. It had Dipper’s name written in Bill’s cursive handwriting that he hated. He wished he’d practiced it a few hundred more times.

His eyes went to Dipper, who was preparing some pancakes. Bill raises an eyebrow. “Can’t you just eat all that food you made last night?”

Dipper glances at him. “I know I already made a ton of food yesterday night for this morning, but I don’t want to eat any of that yet. It’s meant for everyone. Besides, this is just a small pancake so I have something in my stomach. Do you want one?”

Bill plopped down on the sofa. “Sure.” He took his phone out again and began idly scrolling through Twitter, trying to distract himself from the question he’d be asking within two hours.

Dipper shortly finished making the pancakes, and came over to the sofa with two plates in hand, giving one to his boyfriend. He snuggled close to Bill and turned on the TV. “Can we watch a Christmas episode of  _ Everybody Loves Raymond _ ?”

Dipper laughs. A year ago, simply  _ hearing _ the name of the TV show—or even just the name “Raymond”—would bring back painful memories of their past relationship as teens. Now, he became excited whenever he heard it. Dipper opened Amazon Prime Video and scrolled through the episode list, searching for a holiday episode. “Any specific one?”

“No, any Christmas episode would be good,” Bill says, wrapping his arm around Pine Tree and nuzzling his hair. He loved spending time with him like this, being able to cuddle with Dipper on the couch without anyone bothering them.

Dipper eventually selected an episode from Season 4 entitled “The Christmas Picture”. Bill smiled to himself; this was one of his all-time favorite television episodes of all time.

Bill and Dipper spent the next hour and a half watching the television sitcom in the comfort of each other’s arms. After the fifth episode they watched ended, Dipper said, “Bill, you should probably go put on a shirt.”

Bill groaned. “But you love it when I don’t wear shirts.”

“Yeah, but not everyone  _ else _ does,” Dipper said, getting up and putting their plates in the sink to wash them. “Go put on a shirt.”

He exhaled sharply. “Fine,” he said in a tone indicating he wasn’t really mad. Dipper smiled as he went back into the bedroom. Truthfully, he  _ didn’t _ want him to put on a shirt, but they were having company over. Dipper could control his urges, unlike Bill. If he had a dime for the amount of times Bill has coerced him into having sex in a public bathroom stall, he’d be rich.

Bill emerged, wearing his typical white collar shirt without tucking it in (it’s not like he could’ve anyway; he was wearing sweatpants, after all). He didn’t mind that the first two buttons of his shirt weren’t done—it was better than not wearing a shirt at all. As he scrubbed his plate with the soapy sponge, he brushed his lips against Bill’s. “Thank you.”

Bill pulled him into an abrupt embrace, kissing his neck and lightly sucking, leaving a small mark—not too noticeable, but definitely visible. “Anything for you, sweetheart.”

Dipper blushed, saying nothing about the mini-hickey Bill  _ definitely _ left on his neck.

Not much time passed until Mabel, Wendy, Soos, Tambry and Robbie finally arrived and sat down on the couch, talking. Bill pretended he had to go to the bathroom so no one could see him hyperventilate. He’d definitely be shaking while everyone else opened their presents.

Everyone in the living room except for Dipper knew about the proposal, so they agreed to all give their presents to each other first and Bill would give his last, starting with Mabel, then Wendy, Soos, Tambry, Robbie, and ending with Dipper’s proposal. He would have to control himself so he wasn’t visibly shaking; Dipper would know something’s up and he’d have to lie and look like a moron. He tried a few breathing exercises, none of which worked at all.

Bill knew that he couldn’t delay this moment because he was anxious; he had to face it head on. Taking a deep breath, he re-entered the living room, taking a seat next to Dipper and trying to distract himself by focusing on the giving of gifts.

Normally, Dipper would’ve gotten on his case for not saying hi to everyone, but he was already giving everyone their gifts, so he didn’t have the opportunity. Bill was glad, since he didn’t think it was necessary. Everyone already knew what was about to happen.

He zoned out until Dipper gave him his present. “Merry Christmas, Bill,” he said with a smile. He gave him a large paper bag with many layers of wrapping paper inside. He reached in the bag and pulled out… a family size bag of Doritos.

Bill instantly wheezed and began cackling at his lover’s gift, not only because it was funny, but because he was happy he finally had a reason to act all shaky and emotionally unstable as he gave Dipper his gift. After he was able to somewhat control his breathing, he hugged his boyfriend and whispered a choked “thank you, I love it” and sat back down on the couch.

Dipper patted his head. “I’m glad. But your actual gift is yet to come.”

Bill’s laughing ceased at his words. “What do you mean? What do you have for me?”

Dipper wore a mischievous smile as he sat back down. “You’ll see.”

Bill grinned. He knew that he wouldn't be able to get it out of Dipper what his mysterious gift was, so he didn’t try to ask--unlike Mabel, who wouldn't stop bothering him about it as everyone else opened their gifts. Again, Bill wasn’t paying attention as everyone else unwrapped their presents--he was thinking about what he should say when he proposed, and he was also thinking about what Dipper’s mysterious gift was.

It barely felt like any time had passed before it was time for Bill to give his presents. He awkwardly walked up to the tree and grabbed all the presents he got from under the tree. “Merry Christmas, guys.”

Mabel eagerly tore her gift open. It was a pair of pink earbuds--she’d broken her old ones a few days before Christmas, so he thought this would be a nice gift to get her. She smiled wide and thanked Bill with a hug.

Wendy, Tambry and Robbie’s gifts were $30 Spotify gift cards--he knew that they were all addicted to music, so that would keep them covered for a good three months. Everyone thanked him, and watched intently as he grabbed Dipper’s gift from under the tree. “Pine Tree,” he said as he began to shake again. “This is my Christmas gift to you. I really hope you like it.”

Dipper sits up a little straighter. “What is it?”

Bill walks--no, more like waddles--over to where his boyfriend is sitting on the couch, gets down on one knee, and opens the small gift box. “Dipper, will you marry me?”

Dipper stares at the beauteous ring in Bill’s hand; he couldn’t believe he was asking him this. His heart stopped, and the hairs on his neck rose. He couldn’t produce any sort of human noise--he was in total shock.

Until he remembered what his actual gift for Bill was.

He stood up and walked over to the tree, pulling out a small gift box that was tucked behind the rest of them that nobody had noticed before. He turned to Bill and opened it, also getting down on one knee. “I was just about to ask you that.”

Bill felt a lump form in his throat as he stared at his boyfriend standing on one knee with a ring in his hand.  _ He wanted to propose to him first. _ Dipper was ready to spend the rest of his life with him--something that Bill  _ never _ thought he would be prepared for.

This was a miracle, two years in a row.

Bill let the tears fall as he leaped to Dipper’s side and pulled him into the tightest hug he could possibly manage. He didn’t even hear everyone else’s (mostly Mabel’s) screams and cheers of joy. He kissed the top of Dipper’s hair and nuzzled it, whispering an “I love you” as he pulled him close again. He wanted to scream, jump, cry--he was experiencing so much emotion, it was blinding. He thought he couldn’t get any happier when he and Dipper got back together a year ago, but this… was much different.

“Put the rings on!” Mabel cheered. Bill blinked, and let go of his new fiancé, taking his right hand and sliding on the beautiful ring. Dipper did the same, and Mabel suddenly became a crying mess. She pulled the both of them into a tight hug, jumping up and down with joy.

Miraculously, it really was the best Christmas ever.

**Author's Note:**

> Updates are daily throughout December!


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